Healing, reconciliation, and restoration of incorrectly annulled marriage

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TrudeeT

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Hi, I’m new here. I have an unusual request, but I am asking for prayers for the complete healing, restoration, and renewal of our marriage of 22 years. We have an annulment which I am appealing to the Roman Rota because I believe it was wrong and should not have been granted. Neither of us has moved on into other relationships, and circumstances have changed which will only strengthen our marriage bond (he is now Catholic). Any prayers for a softening of J.'s hard heart and the desire to reconcile, and/or appeal to Rome if necessary is greatly appreciated

Thank you, M.

I didn’t mention earlier that my feelings for my husband began to turn back to love and compassion about a year ago, as he was treating me the way he did in the beginning. He came out here to help our son get set up for college and was very kind to me. I prayed about it, and by the time both kids moved in with me last August, I was certain my feelings were sincere, and I shared this with him. Unfortunately my timing was off because just a couple of weeks after that, he went back to the midwest to an empty house with both kids gone - and he began searching online for someone else. That is why I prayed so much for those months leading up to August, to make sure my motives and feelings were authentic. Neither of our kids or I had any idea he was even considering dating again, and I was heartbroken when he emailed me saying he wanted to move on with his life at that point.

He will be moving down here in June. He claims he has met someone down here who is supposedly annulled also, who he wants to ‘date exclusively’ (but realistically, she is like the 3rd woman he’s met online, and they’ve only gone hiking and to dinner once when he was here visiting our kids - my heart and logic both tell me it just isn’t real, and won’t last, especially since they both know that I am appealing to the Rota. To proceed with a relationship knowing I am appealing would ultimately be adultery - but that’s not why I’m appealing, and never has been). Anyway, isn’t it just like the enemy to cause more chaos and confusion when we are trying to do what we believe God is calling us to do, to stand firm in our Catholic faith? I’m praying spiritual warfare prayers as well, and each time I ask God to take away my feelings for him, I just end up feeling more firm in my love and faith. I know this is long, but I wanted to include the updates as well. Thank you and know that I am praying for everyone on here as well!
 
Keeping you and your husband and children in daily prayer…
 
J†M†J
I will pray for your intentions in my rosary tonight.

God Bless
In Jesus through Mary
Steve
 
Thank you again for your prayers. I don’t know why, but I felt so hopeful yesterday, and today I feel like just giving up - it almost feels like too much work to keep praying for this man and our situation. It isn’t really anything he did or didn’t do - I just feel almost apathetic, like I just don’t care anymore. The kids have so many problems of their own, and with me trying to work, keep the house in order (which it isn’t), and be there for them - I guess I’m feeling kind of selfish, like I just have nothing more to give to my kids, J., my job, housecleaning, God - anyone. I guess it’s what they call a ‘dark night of the soul’ maybe? God bless you all, and I really do appreciate it.
 
TrudeeT:

I’m praying for you and your husband.

Praryerfully,

Renato
 
Praying for your intentions.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now, and in the hour of our death. Amen.
 
TrudeeT said:
Thank you again for your prayers. I don’t know why, but I felt so hopeful yesterday, and today I feel like just giving up - it almost feels like too much work to keep praying for this man and our situation. It isn’t really anything he did or didn’t do - I just feel almost apathetic, like I just don’t care anymore. The kids have so many problems of their own, and with me trying to work, keep the house in order (which it isn’t), and be there for them - I guess I’m feeling kind of selfish, like I just have nothing more to give to my kids, J., my job, housecleaning, God - anyone. I guess it’s what they call a ‘dark night of the soul’ maybe? God bless you all, and I really do appreciate it.
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You are certainly in a very dark place in your life of much suffering and stress. Are you able to have a really open hearted talk with someone, perhaps your parish priest or some nun or perhaps a layperson you know. Keeping you in daily prayer…
 
TrudeeT said:
Thank you again for your prayers. I don’t know why, but I felt so hopeful yesterday, and today I feel like just giving up - it almost feels like too much work to keep praying for this man and our situation. It isn’t really anything he did or didn’t do - I just feel almost apathetic, like I just don’t care anymore. The kids have so many problems of their own, and with me trying to work, keep the house in order (which it isn’t), and be there for them - I guess I’m feeling kind of selfish, like I just have nothing more to give to my kids, J., my job, housecleaning, God - anyone. I guess it’s what they call a ‘dark night of the soul’ maybe? God bless you all, and I really do appreciate it.
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Trudee I can understand why you’re feeling drained. This battle you fight is draining on you, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Take a vacation from your worries, put it all into God’s hands. His Will will be done, whether your house is spotless, or not - so go easy on yourself. It sounds like you need a spiritual retreat, even if it is just some quiet time with a close friend, or alone with your prayers in your bedroom. I find a walk in the woods where I can truly appreciate God’s amazing work to be one of the best spiritual retreats I’ve never had to spend a penny on! His beauty surrounds us, and sometimes it helps to just be thankful for all that he has created, and Praise him for granting us eyes to see it, ears to hear it, and our hearts to love it. I find that renewing my appreciation for all he does, helps me to return my trust in him for all he has yet to do in my life.

I pray that you will find peace Trudee. And regain your passion for your family, your work, and your faith. God Bless.
 
Thank you for your kind words and prayers - you are all such a blessing to me! I was in a minor car accident today - no injuries thank God, and not my fault (an uninsured illegal immigrant backed into me). But now I do have a big insurance mess to try to clean up. J. is still being very cold, and even my parents (who have always loved him like their own child) and my parish priest are all saying to just forget about him and move on. I know they have my best interest and health at heart, but I’m still very confused and not sure which way to go - feel like I am just floundering. Is it true that when we are too exhausted to even pray, we can ask our guardian angel to pray for us? I haven’t prayed fervently for my own situation in 2 days, and it seems everything is going downhill. You are all in my thoughts and prayers daily, and will continue to be. God bless:)
 
Barb and Diana Lynn, you are both right - I really do need a little retreat away from all of this. I just started a new schedule at work this week, and I now have weekends off. I think I’ll take the kids and go for a little hike on Saturday. The weather has been beautiful, and it would be such a refreshing change. Thank you for the great advice:)
 
Trudee,
I know exactly how you feel. Trials in this life can be very wearisome and draining on a person, both physically and spiritually. You can ask your guardian angel to pray; just as we all are praying for you. Sometimes it’s o.k. not to go into a lengthy prayer, just say: Jesus, help me. That’s all. He already knows are needs and situations. He’s right beside you as is our Blessed Mother. I will pray for her intercession. She brings me so much comfort. Please hang in there and don’t despair. Praying very hard for you!
 
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