Help a husband

[BlindSheep]

I think it would not be wrong for you to abstain, at least when she would be most likely to ovulate (around 2 weeks after her period starts, give or take a few days) because of the risk of abortion caused by the pill. You may even be obligated to do so - talk to a good priest about this.
Regarding her not letting you get a word in edgewise - my husband does that sometimes, and I’ve found that putting things in writing and leaving it for him to read when he’s in a relaxed mood helps. It might help if she had a chance to talk to another woman who uses NFP. Give her time to mull it over - it sounds like she’s scared of being trapped in a life she doesn’t want, and forced to become someone she doesn’t want to be. It is a scary step to take, a surrender to God, and pushing her may only make her resist more.

 

[Columba]

MR B:

In regards to the b.c. acting as an abortificient, I mentioned this and she insisted that the pill she is on only lowers her hormones (another fallacy thanks to the mother-in-law nurse!).

Good Lord, have mercy on us! And what does she think this “lowering of hormones” actually does?

You could counter with “Yes, it does change your hormones, and your hormones are what allow your body to be “friendly place” for a newly conceived human being! If you mess with the hormones, you’ve created a hostile environment for your child!”

My wife and I are training to be CCL NFP trainers up here in the Great White North, and though I’ve known about the ways the pill does it’s work, it’s been eye opening to understand the details of all the artifical means of contraception.

Something to think about, though: In light of your understanding that the Pill can act as an abortificant, you must be very carefull about how you approach your sexual relationship with your wife.

Look at it this way: Your words say “I disapprove”, your actions say otherwise. As long as you are still “making love” to her while she is knowingly going against your will (and God’s will) in something that intimately concerns the both of you, then she has no reason to change! Why would she? By your actions, she’s still “OK”, right?

If you were to abstain, then it would allow you to bring the Truth of the situation in to sharp focus.

You say you are fasting, that is awesome! It’s the best thing you can do right now, because it will also prepare you to fast from desires other than hunger for the sake of the Truth.

You carry the greater burden, my friend, because God, who is the Truth, has called you to accountability. Your wife has way less CULPABILITY in this situation than yourself. Be Careful who you are serving in this situation.

But again, take this with a grain of salt, as I am but a lay person who does not speak with any authority. Speak with an orthodox priest (ie one that understands that Artificial BC is wrong) and let him guide you in this.

God Bless