Help encourage a drug addict CAF'r

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In order to take care of his family, he has to be sober. If he is using, he can’t take care of anybody including himself. There is nothing more addictive than heroin and oxys. A person in early sobriety can not be around them. They are a ticking time bomb.

You may be right about medical advice. However, I am just sharing my experience.

I live and work at ground zero of the heroin epidemic. Every year we have more od deaths than there are days in the year. There are two methadone clinics in a town of 36,000 people. And they are full. I do advocacy work for the disabled. I deal with a lot of addicts. I have never seen anyone put together more than 3 years of sobriety while on methadone. The people who have managed to put together more than 5 years have kicked methadone.

When anyone goes to a detox or a rehab, they are under the care of both a medical doctor and a psychiatrist. Both of which will be able to give him the advice that no one else should be giving him.

I think that the initial advice of going to a detox and a rehab and if that fails going to the emergency room to get admitted covers seeking medical advice. Getting off methadone would be handled entirely at the detox and rehab under a doctors daily monitoring.

Sometimes, you have to ask friends and family for help when you can’t take care of your obligations. I was forced to move home with my late wife when her terminal illness became too much for me to take care of while working full time. You have to swallow your pride for the good of your spouse. That is how I ended up living and working at ground zero of the heroin epidemic. It is where 5 generations of my family have lived.

In early sobriety, no one can take care of anyone with their drug of choice staring at them. Coming off heroin is 10 times more difficult than most drugs. You need to have structure in your life, and you can get that by living in a halfway house or sober house. If he relapses, he will be no good to his family. He will be harmful to them.

I can’t tell anyone how to live life, I am not trying to pick a fight with anyone. I am just sharing my experience with the only thing that I have seen that works. I am trying to be a good Christian instead of sitting on the sidelines ignoring someone who is crying out for help.
 
I also come from a city where there is a serious heroin epidemic. Two of my close friends have lost immediate family to overdoses. One of these people is a medical professional herself and the other one, who was also previously a drug abuser themself, is now running a non-profit to educate people and families about the opiate epidemic.

In addition to that, I was involved with the music and arts industry for several decades. The number of people I know who had addictions to heroin as well as alcohol, meth, and various types of pills is large. Some of them are dead. Some of them are or were in prison.

Before I was married I had a 10 year relationship with a person who was cross-addicted to alcohol and other drugs. He eventually died. His death was traumatic for me. I don’t know if he OD’ed or just died from the physical effects of so many years of abusing his body.

In addition to knowing people, I have read widely.

I appreciate that you have personal experience in this area, as do I. I get some sense from your post that you believe you are very knowledgeable on this subject. Please understand that many of us also have knowledge and experiences that we may not want to share on the public forum. I am not going to talk in detail about what my friends have been through and I really don’t want to talk about what I myself went through either. It’s private.

Also, no matter how experienced you are, you still need to be careful about giving out medical advice on this forum. You do not know all the details of Spyridon’s experience and he really needs counseling and medical help from people who are right there on the scene, see his situation, and can help address his day to day needs. Telling someone via the internet they need to do this and do that and do the other thing is not all that helpful and may even be harmful if the advice you’re handing out contradicts what the person’s doctor or counselor thinks is best for him.

In short, I think it’s better if we stick to praying for the person and not try to judge what they need based on our own experiences. Your mileage may vary.
 
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Don’t apologize. You’re not a bad person; you’re a decent person with a monkey on his back. No one here has any less love for you because you stumbled.

Get some help, dude. This is a life threatening condition you’re struggling with. It’s an absolute emergency. Treat it as such. Dying fixes nothing. Plus I’d miss having you around. 🙂

Get back on the right track. You can do it. Get the appropriate professional help.
 
While I’m sure this advice is meant well, Spyridon’s wife is ill and needs drugs, and he is caring for her, so it may be difficult for him to just ditch out on sick wife unless he can find another caregiver
If he’s swiping her medication, he’s doing more harm than good.
Also, it’s inappropriate to tell someone in a methadone program that they need to get off it. I realize that the programs are controversial and there’s a variety of views on them, but being on a methadone program or not is both a personal decision and a medical decision of the person.
I believe that Methadone does have a place in drug treatment; however, it hasn’t been effective here. He MUST consult a professional and consider another strategy.
 
I believe that Methadone does have a place in drug treatment; however, it hasn’t been effective here. He MUST consult a professional and consider another strategy
Maybe, maybe not, but deciding whether methadone has been effective is a question for a physician with experience treating addiction. Who knows, maybe but for the methadone there would have been a dozen more relapses.
 
It’s only one part of a larger treatment plan. Hopefully, he’s actually seeing someone experienced.
 
People have reached out to me regarding my experience that I shared earlier. Their points are valid. Based on their thoughts I’d like to briefly amend my past stated opinions.

AA and NA have both helped a lot of people recover from addiction a day at a time. Both programs will work if you follow them. Stylistically there are differences, and a person would be well served checking both of them out.

I am not a Medical Doctor or Addiction Specialist. My advice is purely anecdotal from my limited experience. I am not qualified to give an opinion on methadone that anyone should follow. You can take it for what it is worth. (This and two dollars still won’t buy you a cup of coffee at Starbucks)

What I previously said is what I have seen work. It was poorly composed. Several people have told me that I came off unintentionally authoritatively. I am not an authority. I am just a guy with an opinion just like everyone else.
 
I also know that it’s true that you can still find AA meetings where addicts are absolutely unwelcome, or where the abuse of drugs other than alcohol isn’t adequately addressed - but again, I wouldn’t slam AA as a waste of time because of that.
I hadn’t really intended those comments to become public (although I can see how HolySpirit may have thought otherwise). But since they have I’d like to extend that remark by acknowledging my observation that this is becoming less and less frequent as time passes. I even have specific knowledge of a meeting that used to be very firm about not talking about drugs other than alcohol (to the point where those who identified as addicts were made to leave), but that some years back turned that around and now explicitly welcomes everyone seeking recovery.

Spyridon - please please please find yourself a home in whatever 12-step fellowship suits you best, and also have a serious discussion with a physician who’s familiar with the nature of addiction.
 
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Holy God
Holy Almighty
Holy Immortal
Have mercy on us

Holy God
Holy Almighty
Holy Immortal
Have mercy on us

Holy God
Holy Almighty
Holy Immortal
Have mercy on us

Lifting Spyridon in prayer. Keep him in Your grip, Lord.
 
I won’t pretend that anything I’d say would outweigh the force of craving you are suffering from.

Do you have anyone who can sit and hold your hand? To be with you so you’re not alone in this?

You have my sincere prayers and wishes for a way to overcome this thing. Addiction is a monster. 😧
 
Im sorry guys,

I relapsed. All sorts of drugs…,

I just wanna die
Do not apologize. It’s an addiction, a disease. Not a character defect.

These drugs change your very brain chemistry. You cannot use mere willpower to defeat something that influences the very seat of of the will, itself.

Get help, get better, and forgive yourself.
 
@Spyridon…please, please call the VA or NA or someone. Don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault. Like QC said - it’s a disease.

You can do this - we know you can.
 
Hey @Spyridon, come the weekend I’m gonna pray a rosay just for you and 30 minutes Eucharistic adoration also dedicated only for you.

In the meanwhile be reminded a relapse isn’t the end of the world. I know it hits your moral hard but you haven’t ruined all the work you have done so far. Just as with sinning pick yourself up and retake the path you have been on.

God bless you my friend.
 
Spy, I just put you in the Adoration intentions book at the chapel.
I also said a whole Novena for you before this happened so the only thing for you to do is just get back up and let God take over and don’t use.
I will keep praying for you.
 
St Jude Prayer for Addiction

God of life, You made me in Your perfect image, to live in Your love and to give You glory, honor and praise. Open my heart to Your healing power. Come, Lord Jesus, calm my soul just as you whispered “Peace” to the stormy sea. St. Jude, most holy Apostle, in my need I reach out to you. I beg you to intercede for me that I may find strength to overcome my illness. Bless all those who struggle with addiction. Touch them, heal them, reassure them of the Father’s constant love. Remain at my side, St. Jude, to chase away all evil temptations, fears, and doubts. May the quiet assurance of your loving presence illuminate the darkness in my heart and bring lasting peace.

Amen.
 
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