Help (Flylady)

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Mommyof02green

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Okay, I fell off the wagon! Well there really isn’t a wagon, but I think you know what I mean. I’ve gone in streaks… good, clean, not perfect, but “livable” to you better call Kim and Aggie!

Okay, so it doesn’t stay bad for years like those on the show, but it sure does start to look and feel that way… Oh the mountains of dirt and filth.

After reading several postings back in July/August I thought I would give flylady a try. Well I did good at first, (I even was able to wash some of the walls). The house was coming together, clutter and junk was on the way out of the door.

I did good for the most part during the month of September too. I had a few hick-ups a day or too that slipped. (But I got on track the next day and things were going good.)

October moved in and I haven’t done things in weeks! Dishes are piled everywhere, the laundry room once again has a mountain of clothing and the living room has its own mountain of clothing (The clean cloths).

I’ve got new floor rugs in the bedrooms and bathroom. Clothing makes such nice floor rugs don’t you think! 😊

The plus is that I went nearly 2 whole months with a livable house. I’ve never gone that long before! So I see the good with Flylady.

However, I’m now overwhelm and don’t know if I can do it. Sure I can crisis clean and get things in order. (Mom is coming over tomorrow to help crisis clean). However, can I keep it up is another question.

I’ve joined a local flylady group, but they aren’t supportive. I’ve tried to contact them to let them know my struggles in hopes to get some feed back. However, NO one in the group has responded.

Seeing I found out about flylady from this forum I thought I would post here and see if I can get some positive feed back and support from the “flybabies” here!

God Bless.
 
Ha! I’m in the same spot, emotionally speaking! Except my house is on the market so it always has to be clean. But emotionally I am in the same spot. I feel like I just manage to keep the house in the same condition that it’s in (which thankfully isn’t too terribly bad, since we have to keep it ready for people to come looking). But doing *extra *things, or actually *improving *the house? Forget about it! Also, we are without a microwave right now and so everything is cooked in pots on the stove, it seems. The dirty pots were just sitting there all day waiting for me! And then they have to soak for a while and clutter up the sink for new dirty dishes :eek:

But today I really got on a roll and with a lot of Heavenly help, I was able to clean all the pots, do my regular housework, and even a little bit extra 🙂 What did I do differently today? I said the Rosary! First time all week that I’ve managed to say a whole one 😊

I’m so silly, every time this happens it goes hand in hand with my spiritual life! I don’t pray because I’m feeling frazzled because of the house and then I don’t feel “refreshed” from praying and don’t have the energy/motivation to put extra effort into my chores. It is a viscious cycle!

My advice to you would be to go ahead and do the crisis cleaning tomorrow and then work a plan to make sure you have a time not only to do the necessary household chores, but to pray. Prayer has got to be a priority. If I don’t pray, my housework doesn’t go well. Granted, even when I do pray I have hard days, but I get through a whole lot happier at the end of the day 🙂

Oh, and I also find myself thinking “How do I know I will keep this up and it’s not just a one-time thing?” That kind of attitude does nothing but demotivate me. I think it will help if I’m conscious of it and try to be humble about it, realizing I will fail from time to time, but that God will give me the grace I need to make it through each day.
 
Flybaby here.

When I find myself getting overwhelmed and spinning in circles with everything that has to be done I kind of do a modified crisis clean schedule. I get my chores done in 15 min blocks then rest the last 15. I call it doing a cycle. And usually by the third cycle the house is presentable again. I find by doing it that way I stay focused on the task at hand better and don’t fall into piddling and fiddling which I am so apt to do.

My biggest obstacle is my inner brat who looks at the control journal and stomps her foot saying “You can’t MAKE ME” Zone work is just a joke. All I need to do is 15 min, but try getting my little tush away from the computer long enough to do it…🤷

One thing I do is divide my home blessing hour chores into a daily task. So one day is vacuum, one is dust, one is sweep/mop kitchen floor and so on.

Every day I do one type of laundry. It rotates on a 3 day schedule, lights, darks, towels. Most days it only takes one load, sometimes it takes a second. But I wash, dry, fold, and put away the day’s load. (but I must confess, sometimes it gets away from me and becomes a cycle chore.)

I know I am my own worst enemy. But I just keep plugging along. Even at its worst its better than normal used to be. Don’t get discouraged. Just jump back in.

Arlene
 
Arlene said:
I know I am my own worst enemy. But I just keep plugging along. Even at its worst its better than normal used to be. Don’t get discouraged. Just jump back in.

Arlene
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I second this. I think that is why I like flylady. She has you begin where you are. So if you fall off the wagon you just jump back on wherever you can catch it. I LOVE zones! They keep me sane.

My sister is my support. I hope everyone can find a close friend as a support. Sometimes we strangers just don’t get it on a personal level.
 
Hello! I’ve lurked here a long time, but thought this was worth posting to.

If your mom is supportive, could she help keep you accountable? Could she come over once a week and help you clean up and enjoy a cup of tea?

You could go over to her house once a week to help her, too. Maybe she needs help with running errands, doing heavy scrubbing like the floorboards or the tub, or out of reach things like the ceiling fans.

You are very blessed to have a supportive mom!
 
One of the key things of all flylady’s emails is “You are not behind!”

Of course I feel behind if I don’t do a zone thing in a day - for instance I finally boogied my car today, but it was called for on Wednesday. But I do have so much done I am really proud of myself! Yeah! My DH is doing the flybaby thing with me too.

The other day I not only cleaned out my closet – I bleached the grout in the kitchen (and shined the sink!). I find myself being able to do only two or three things as “routines” for now, and that’s fine: I am 7 months pregnant, and have three kids to care for!

A funny thing…not a flylady thing, but rather familial, and I just dusted it the other day and really thought about it:

My dad gave me a round piece of glass. It can stand up, or it can be a paper weight, either way, in the center of the circle is engraved the words “To It”

Get it?

This was my dad’s way of avoiding procrastination – I can’t say “when I get around to it.” Because I do have a ROUND “TO IT”

LOL

I look att hing loveingly when I think of doing my little house blessings and daily chores. I too seperate the house into blessing zones – Monday: Kitchen, Tues: Bathrooms, Wed:Floors, Thurs: Errands, Friday: dusting, living & family rooms, Saturday: Bedrooms.

You are not behind, you just jump back in when and where you feel like it.
 
Hello Momof2green,

Just a suggestion from a fellow perennial flybaby: It sounds like you and your family have too many articles of clothing! If there’s that much clothes laying around, it must be because no one is really missing them - give them away. I was reluctant to do this myself, thinking, “oh, I/he/she might want to wear this again someday”. “MIGHT”??? “WANT”??? - If they don’t need it, give it away, someone else needs it more. That’s want the Gospel calls us to do, too.

Purge, purge, purge. You won’t regret it.
 
nobody said:
Hello Momof2green,

Just a suggestion from a fellow perennial flybaby: It sounds like you and your family have too many articles of clothing! If there’s that much clothes laying around, it must be because no one is really missing them - give them away. I was reluctant to do this myself, thinking, “oh, I/he/she might want to wear this again someday”. “MIGHT”??? “WANT”??? - If they don’t need it, give it away, someone else needs it more. That’s want the Gospel calls us to do, too.

Purge, purge, purge. You won’t regret it.
Click to expand...
That is such a good point. To combat this problem myself I stopped buying hangers. I have a color of hanger for each family member to make sorting laundry easier. When the hangers are full that is it.

We found a level of clothing that keeps us rotating well with how often we do laundry and how much storage we have. If something new comes in, something old goes out. So far it is working except that it does give my husband an excuse not to replace some of his more worn items. But otherwise it works great.

My sister and I discussed that some people have too many clothes to have all of them put away at the same time. It really emphasized to us about the need for homes for everything. A hanger is a home and space in the closet for said item on a hanger is another home.
 
Honestly, we don’t have that many clothing… I just haven’t been doing the laundry like I should and things aren’t getting put away in the dressers or dirty clothing hamper.

I have a feeling that it looks worst then it really is.

Seeing I haven’t kept up on the laundry it’s everywhere… (We’ve all been lazy about putting stuff away)

The kids go through 2 outfits a day. One outfit for school and one outfit for after school. They have enough clothing to last them 6 days and that’s it. So there really isn’t much.

Hubby and I have about 7 days worth of clothing.

It’s just I haven’t been doing laundry every day like I should so the laundry is backed-up. I got behind on the laundry and lately I’ve only been washing what we need for the next day and not doing more then that… So the laundry really isn’t getting done. I just haven’t added to the mess so to speak.

I said a mountain of laundry, but that mountain also included towels, blankets, sheets, etc. Also what I might consider to be a mountain could just be a mole hill to some.

After all the stuff is in hampers (at least the clean stuff is; the dirty stuff can be found everywhere). We just have been cycling between the hampers in the living room and hampers in the laundry room. (I mean the floors around the house :)) Having some hampers full of stuff to me is a mountain. And when say all the stuff is in the hamper or floor that is exactly what I mean… there is nothing in the closets/dressers.

When I joined Flylady back in July/Aug I went through our clothing and got rid of 10-30 gallon garbage bags of clothing. At this point I really don’t feel I can down size more!

However, I thank you for the suggestion!

Someone suggest that I have Mom come up weekly. Well that’s not the easiest thing for us to do. Her hubby works 3rd shift and she needs to wake him up. So she’s limited on the hours she can be here. (Some may say why doesn’t he set the alarm? Honestly he works long and hard hours that he doesn’t hear the alarm… Mom has to be sure he gets up)

I also work 3rd shift… so it can be difficult for me to get up “early”… that is to say before 10 am!

Add that with the drive. It can take up to an hour to get to each other houses… So it was a real treat that she came today. I don’t get to see my Mom much outside of church.

We have several towns between us. I live in the north and she lives in the south. On Sundays we drive south and they (Mom and her hubby) drive north to meet in a town between us to go to church. I’m blessed that we get to at least see each other every week that way.

Thanks for all the replies!
 
There is always the laundromat route. Take it all, spend a Saturday, and get it all finished and put up in the same day.
 
Mommyof2green,

So good to hear what headway you made with clothing when you joined Flylady! Kudos!

I got so far behind on my house while I was pregnant that I thought it would never recover. She is now 5 weeks old and I am just starting to get into the “zone” again.

Please remember that the most important aspect (that I have seen) from Flylady is to give yourself credit for what you accomplish, not guilt for what you don’t. That, I think, is what speaks to so many people. Accomplishment creates momentum. Guilt makes us sedentary.

Give yourself credit just for noting that you fell off the wagon! 👍 Thanks for this thread. It has reminded me to continue blessing my home. I had forgotten that during my difficult pregnancy. You reminded me to bless. Thank you!!
 
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