Help I'm addicted to laziness

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danielsisk619

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I don’t know what to do. I’m addicted, addicted to laziness and the government and my parents are my enablers. I need help.

It started 3 years ago when I lost my job and got my first unemployment check. At first I was diligent in job hunting but soon my persistence waned. Finally I was sitting at home watching TV and surfing the net everyday while lying on my unemployment forms. Then after exhausting my unemployment my mother started helping me by paying my bills. Sadly, and unbeknownst to me at the time, my mother had to cash in her retirement in order to help me. Now that I know I intend to put money in a retirement fund for her once I am able. So now I was taking money from my mother and still doing nothing.

Eventually I finished night school and got my Associates in computer programming and found a job. Sadly it didn’t last, thanks to a personality conflict between me and the company’s owner. So once again momma and the government came to the rescue. My mother paid my bills and the government paid for me to fill my stomach with junk via food stamps. All the while I’m sitting around the house doing nothing.

Then about a year ago I moved in with my mom and step dad here in Visalia. While here I’ve learned just how correct Benjamin Franklin was he said “The best way to help the poor out of poverty is to make them uncomfortable in their poverty.” I know this to be true not because I am uncomfortable in my impoverished state but because I’m exceedingly comfortable in it. Here living with my parents I have access to over HD digital cable with premium channels, high speed internet, a comfortable bed, central heating, air conditioning, my mother’s great cooking, and pizza or Mexican food on the nights she doesn’t cook. The only discomfort I have is the chore of cleaning up dog **** and my nagging conscience. Of course my conscience use to be easily drowned out by the TV or surfing the net. That’s not the case anymore.

So I need help. I’m addicted to laziness and I don’t know what to do. There’s a part of me that wants to just move out now despite the fact that I have no where to go. Another part of me wants to move out and start walking to DC in hopes of getting there by August 28th. Of course there’s a big part, the lazy part, of me that just wants to stay where I am until they finally kick me out, which might be in a few months.

All I ask is that you pray for me and if you have any advice please share.

Thank you and God Bless.
 
Yep, you may be lazy and unmotivated but you also sound depressed. I think it was brave to be so honest on this board. How old are you exactly? I’m assuming you are male because of your user name, right? I think you should make a plan and do things one step at a time while checking in with us here for some accountability.

It sounds like your days and nights have no structure at all, so firstly maybe you should start getting up early each morning and going to Mass. Go to the priest and go to confession, start with a clean slate. Explain that you know you need to change some behaviors and ask for his advice.

Next maybe sell any computer games or electronic toys that are sucking your life away and give the money to your mom.

I have a few more “thoughts, ideas and indignant remarks” but I would like to hear your response on what I’ve said so far.

God bless you.
 
Don’t focus on the enablers, Daniel. The focus must be on your own motivation and choices. And becoming mature. You’re still basically living as a child.
Walking to DC is a fantasy that doesn’t guarantee a job or an apartment…but who knows if it would break the cycle. You need to make practical decisions for your life. And to think more for others. Remember that Jesus command is to love others as self, God above all. And He judges us by the lives of practical charity that we live…see Matthew 26 verses 31-46.

Please God you can carve out a good life for yourself rather than, forgive me, a parasitic one! Step by step.
…I can understand something of how difficult it would be for you…

Good on you for wishing you could. God grant you will! 🙂
 
Sloth is basically when one knows the right thing to do, but chooses some other activity instead. The thing chosen always provides immediate gratification. It is like, I should go work on my project - an effort that may be arduous or tedious, but instead I will play a game or watch a movie.

It is due to a lack of fortitude. Fortitude involves the control of our inner life, our appetites and desires, our emotions, and our fears. We receive fortitude from Christ. It is also a gift of the Holy Spirit. Doubling your spiritual efforts with a sincere desire to conquer sloth will help the problem.

Some people have found that an amount of self-denial or mortification can help to overcome the sin of sloth. For instance, limit the amount of TV that you watch, fasting, or not allowing yourself idle time.
 
If your health is good, have you considered joining the military? They are very good at instilling a work ethic in the lazy. You can get your attitude adjusted, travel and have some adventures, and most importantly do something worthwhile by serving your country all at the same time. I’m not joking. At the end of four years you would have you pride again and also have paid your mother back her retirement savings. Two of my brothers-in-law spent time in Iraq, so I’m not naive about the risks.
 
i’m glad your conscience is bothering you because sloth is a deadly sin.

your soul will die and your body will die, lying there on the couch with the clicker in your hand.

minus all the “maybe’s” i like kindness’ directive: **start getting up early each morning and going to Mass. Go to the priest and go to confession, start with a clean slate. **

for a while, that will mean you’ll have to get up tired. do NOT wait till you get to bed on time before you get up in the morning. it will never happen. instead, get up in the morning and go to mass. after a few days of doing this exhausted, you’ll start going to bed at night OR you’ll start staying in bed and sleeping all day again…

i’m going to tell you EXACTLY the same thing i tell the women i sponsor in AA (they’re addicts, too)

every morning pray (you go to Mass)
every morning shower and brush teeth and put on clean clothes (that means you have to do laundry.)
every morning eat breakfast. if the cereal box has a cartoon mascot, don’t eat it.
every morning, wash the dishes in the sink.
every morning feed the cat (or kids or dog or all of them. no one gets left out.)
every day turn in at least ONE job application. (Unless you stay home with kids. you don’t.)
every day follow up on at least ONE job application.
every day eat a meal that you cooked.
every evening, clean up after the meal.
never turn on the TV or computer until after dinner and ONLY if the rest of the list has happened.
every night pray again.
every night, go to bed 8 hours before you need to wake up for Mass.
 
danielsisk619 said:
I don’t know what to do. I’m addicted, addicted to laziness and the government and my parents are my enablers. I need help.
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Just stop it. You are not addicted to anything. People use addiction as an excuse for many behaviors that are not true addictions, this being one instance. It cheapens the word for the things that are truly addictions. You may have a bad habit of laziness and using people, but you are not addicted.

If you realize you have this problem and yet do nothing about it, perhaps you really do need to seek professional counseling. You are too young to be sitting there doing nothing. You need to find out why you have no motivation to stop living off of anyone that will support you, if you ever hope to have a meaningful, healthy relationship with anyone in the future.

Great advice given by Monicatholic as usual. Now follow it and stop wallowing in self pity about something that you have the power to change but choose not to.
 
First off, it is great that you realize that something is wrong. There are people I know who are addicted to laziness but whom would never admit it.

Try taking little steps at a time. One thing I do to combat laziness is to get up in the morning and exercise. It puts me in a productive mood for the rest of the day and it’s good for me too.

I love laying on the couch all day watching TV but I always feel guilt when I realize how much of the day I have wasted. Take things one step at a time when turning things around

Good Luck
 
Get dressed up. If you’ve gained too much weight to wear your suit, go buy another suit, or at least wear dress pants, dress shirt, and tie. Cut your hair, and remove any piercings. Cover any tattoos. If by some strange chance you have sculptured nails, get rid of them.

Go to the closest hospital and find the Human Resources Department.

Ask for a job application and fill it out. Ideally, you should also give them a copy of your resume–you can type one up on your computer while you’re watching TV at home.

With an Associates in Comp Sci, you are qualified for several nice jobs at the hospital.

Unit Clerk
General Office Assistant
Medical Records (filing)
Maintenance (yes, janitorial/housekeeping)
Dietary (Cafeteria)

Hopefully you won’t find these jobs beneath you. Everyone who works in a hospital is helping to make patients well and help healthy people stay that way. These jobs are not going to make you wealthy, but they will pay a living wage and enable you to move out of your parents’ home. (You’ll probably have to find a roommate, but many hospitals have other people who are looking for roommates.)

Most hospitals are always short-staffed in the above departments. Some hospitals (ours, e.g.) have a hiring freeze because of Medicare and Medicaid reimbursements that are not coming (we live in Illinois, one of the “broke” states). However, hospitals can’t keep their doors open without adequate numbers of the people above, so they will break their own hiring freeze to hire unit clerks, dietary, etc… Sometimes managers will fill in and do their own office busy work, but this makes it difficult for them to get any real work done, so they usually end up hiring an Office Assistant.

What I’m telling you is that usually hospitals will hire people for the above jobs if they have qualified applicants, and you sound qualified.

It’s possible that you will enjoy hospital work, and perhaps decide to take up a health care profession. Most hospitals will reimburse your tuition to go to college for nursing or many other health care professions.

It is also possible that if you continue to work at the hospital, you can work your way up to the Information Systems Department. Most of the people who work in IS in our hospital did not have computer science degrees; they were just interested in computers.
 
I will pray for you, that you heed guidance, from the spirit and those you love. My advice. Move… move something. Mow the lawn. If you are at home mooching you need to respect your mom and ensure that ‘her’ house is clean every day.
Go to mass everyday. It will help with your so called ‘addiction’. I am addicted to the Body and Blood of Jesus. I’m proud of this. And I do it as often as I can. I just love the Mass and Eucharistic adoration. But I also work a full time and a part time job. I have to ‘work it in’ anywhere I can. That is work. Playing a video game is an exscuse. I’m sorry but maybe you need honesty. Everyone claims an addiction. It is a cop out exscuse for you not accepting accountability for your own actions.
Video games, tv … how about you read the Bible? Or volunteer at a soup kitchen or your Church. Service… Jesus came not to be served but to serve.
If all of this does not work. Join the Marines. They have a great plan for motivating the youth.
I pray you heed this. You will be happier I guarantee it.
 
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