Help.... I'm backsliding

[Nabooru]

For about ten years I was involved in Hinduism, and a smattering of Buddhism and New Age. It took a nightmare followed by a panic attack to send me back to God. It’s a long story and I won’t tell it all here.

I’ve enjoyed being a Christian (again… I was raised in the LCMS but later thought I was too good for Christianity and actively disparaged it). But recently I’ve been tempted to return to Hinduism. I think of all the color and brightness of it, how pretty its patterns and idols are to look at, the nag champa incense, the the beautiful gods and goddesses (detached though they are), the music, the aesthetics of it all. I remember how exotic and mysterious my bedroom and office space used to look when it was covered with images of multi-armed deities, how perfumed they were with constantly-burning incense, and how I would sit in front of a murti and chant words I couldn’t understand, not even knowing what they literally meant. I had Indian architectural pieces and art all throughout my living space.

I hardly ever felt good as a Hindu, since I was upset with the concept of countless reincarnations to please a distant god, eventually ending in a dissolution of self into a formless…spirit godhead thing. The slightest error on my part could render all the work I’d done so far to end my samsara cycle worthless - I’d have to come back again to correct it and pay the price. I didn’t feel close to God and I was not a better person, or even that good of a person. So I really don’t know why I miss it, except for the prettiness and outward showiness of it, and the feeling of being “different” and “enlightened” as a white Hindu convert. But at times this temptation is very strong. I did spend a very long time as a Hindu, and I’ve only been a returned Christian for a year and a half or so.

Please help me fight this off!

 

[codefro]

I just got to say… I read your post rather quickly so if I am mistaken I apologize in advance… but nowhere do you mention that you miss Hinduism because it was the truth. Yet, your quick reference to “return to God” had some weight that you came to the Church because it was true. If I like at your reasons for wanting to be Hindu again, it is merely aesthetics. You like the way the statues look, or your bedroom looked, or your home, etc. I can understand the thought of the beautiful statues being attractive in your religion (I myself am a Catholic, yet I have always had a fascination with the look of statues of the buddha), yet I would not ever be able to devote myself to the statue of the buddha because I know I would be wasting my time. The One True God, made incarnate in the man Jesus Christ, is the one who said “I am the way, the truth, and the life” and anybody who wishes to come to the Father must come through Christ. So if I could encourage you, please go and visit God. Go to visit the Blessed Sacrament, and get on your knees and ask God to make himself more real to you than maybe it has seemed.

On another applicable level, why not make a shrine in your home? You could make a shrine devoted to our Lady or another saint/s by getting a kneeler, statues, candles- an area where you can constantly ask for the intercession of your patron saint/s. I pray the Lord bless you.

 

[Inwe86]

For about ten years I was involved in Hinduism, and a smattering of Buddhism and New Age. It took a nightmare followed by a panic attack to send me back to God. It’s a long story and I won’t tell it all here.

I’ve enjoyed being a Christian (again… I was raised in the LCMS but later thought I was too good for Christianity and actively disparaged it). But recently I’ve been tempted to return to Hinduism. I think of all the color and brightness of it, how pretty its patterns and idols are to look at, the nag champa incense, the the beautiful gods and goddesses (detached though they are), the music, the aesthetics of it all. I remember how exotic and mysterious my bedroom and office space used to look when it was covered with images of multi-armed deities, how perfumed they were with constantly-burning incense, and how I would sit in front of a murti and chant words I couldn’t understand, not even knowing what they literally meant. I had Indian architectural pieces and art all throughout my living space.

I hardly ever felt good as a Hindu, since I was upset with the concept of countless reincarnations to please a distant god, eventually ending in a dissolution of self into a formless…spirit godhead thing. The slightest error on my part could render all the work I’d done so far to end my samsara cycle worthless - I’d have to come back again to correct it and pay the price. I didn’t feel close to God and I was not a better person, or even that good of a person. So I really don’t know why I miss it, except for the prettiness and outward showiness of it, and the feeling of being “different” and “enlightened” as a white Hindu convert. But at times this temptation is very strong. I did spend a very long time as a Hindu, and I’ve only been a returned Christian for a year and a half or so.

Please help me fight this off!

Is sacrificing the Truth for a pretty-looking room worth it in the end? Your attraction to Hinduism is superficial. The Catholic Faith is so much deeper. Spend some time reading Sacred Scripture and get to know God. Deepen your relationship with Him. Falling in love with the Truth will help kick your temptations.

 

[Inwe86]

On another applicable level, why not make a shrine in your home? You could make a shrine devoted to our Lady or another saint/s by getting a kneeler, statues, candles- an area where you can constantly ask for the intercession of your patron saint/s. I pray the Lord bless you.

I second this idea. I have a beautiful shrine in my room. And yes, I have plenty of colorful statues, candles and pictures.

 

[Aussiegal]

It sounds like you are being attacked and seduced by the great “liar” Satan, he is offering you all the pleasures of the flesh and senses, he dosen’t want to loose you! But what is to gain at the end of all this if you are to loose Heaven. Where will these temptations lead you…I think you already know the answer to this!

You say you have been a returned Christian for a year and a half. I trust you have fully confessed your past and are holding nothing back. Do you have a good spiritual Director to guide and help you through this? Immerse yourself in spiritual weapons when these temptations come–The Rosary, The Sacraments, The Holy Mass. Read scripture daily and pray, pray, pray so you never loose sight of the truth and all that is of God.

I will keep you in my prayers.

 

[Nabooru]

It sounds like you are being attacked and seduced by the great “liar” Satan, he is offering you all the pleasures of the flesh and senses, he dosen’t want to loose you! But what is to gain at the end of all this if you are to loose Heaven. Where will these temptations lead you…I think you already know the answer to this!

You say you have been a returned Christian for a year and a half. I trust you have fully confessed your past and are holding nothing back. Do you have a good spiritual Director to guide and help you through this? Immerse yourself in spiritual weapons when these temptations come–The Rosary, The Sacraments, The Holy Mass. Read scripture daily and pray, pray, pray so you never loose sight of the truth and all that is of God.

I will keep you in my prayers.

I do feel like this sometimes, like I’m being tempted by all the glitter and buzzing that is Hinduism. I liked the sensation of being different and feeling like I was smarter than everyone else. I liked the Indian and Middle Eastern-style clothing I wore to stand out. I liked how my pluralistic religious views made me look enlightened and academically trendy. So perhaps pride plays a role, too.

 

[katcecelia]

You might also look for a Latin or Eastern Rite mass that has a more formal aesthetic feel to attend when the yearning is strong…

 

[codefro]

I do feel like this sometimes, like I’m being tempted by all the glitter and buzzing that is Hinduism. I liked the sensation of being different and feeling like I was smarter than everyone else. I liked the Indian and Middle Eastern-style clothing I wore to stand out. I liked how my pluralistic religious views made me look enlightened and academically trendy. So perhaps pride plays a role, too.

Is this a troll thread?

 

[bre]

Lord, hear our prayers

 

[katcecelia]

and who says Christians must have drab colors in their homes?.. maybe you could find a poster of a stained glass rosette… and some of the Eastern Icons are very colorful and bright

 

[Aussiegal]

I do feel like this sometimes, like I’m being tempted by all the glitter and buzzing that is Hinduism. I liked the sensation of being different and feeling like I was smarter than everyone else. I liked the Indian and Middle Eastern-style clothing I wore to stand out. I liked how my pluralistic religious views made me look enlightened and academically trendy. So perhaps pride plays a role, too.

Is the desire to feel different and smarter than another worth the risk of loosing your soul?
PRIDE certainly does play a part in this, but I do admire your honesty.

I would run from this as fast as my legs would carry me, educate yourself on the risks of dabbling in New Age religions, it’s simply not worth it!

 

[Contra_Mundum_1]

Our faith is so beautiful, colourful and vibrant. I can’t imagine higher art than what Catholicism has produced. Maybe you could investigate this aspect of our faith more.

Pray the Rosary every day in order to fight off this temptation. It is such a powerful weapon.

God bless.

 

[InJesusItrust]

As an ex-Hindu, I would say stay away. Demons will tempt you and torment you to leave Christ, but do not budge. Eventually you might have to deal with spiritual oppression.