Help! need advice on confession

[lit_lover88]

I am probably not posting this in the right place but I know you nice people will help me.

I was confirmed in the Catholic church a year ago. Everything was going wonderfully, RCIA was amazing, the people going through it with me, the sponsors, it was just beautiful. Then afterwards some of my peers ugliness surfaced, and I let it affect me so deeply that I have only been to mass 3 times since May, and I haven’t been to confession since. I have been struggling with my beliefs my whole entire life, leaning towards paganism, and after I disagreed with some of my fellow catholics, a woman popped into my life who is Wiccan. I started going to her house for classes, i.e. learning about herbs, candles, and stones. Now my inner turmoil is calming a little and I know in my heart that I belong in the catholic church, but I also know in my heart that I can’t conform to EVERYTHING that the church teaches. I’m ok with gay people and I’m ok with pagans and people of differing religions. So having said all of this, I really want to get back into the church and recieve communion. However I need to go to confession first, but the problem is, I don’t feel guilty for partaking in wiccan classes. I don’t feel that I did anything wrong by studying these things, because I did not practice anything. I didn’t EVER pray to any other Gods, anytime my friends said a spell, I said a prayer similar to what there spell was and directed toward God. I never took part in tarot, or astrology, or divination. However I do not feel that they did anything wrong by doing these things, as long as they did not force them on me. So in my eyes I did not commit a sin, but in some of my peers’ eyes I did. How can I admit guilt for something that I don’t feel guilty for? How do I solve this problem? The only thing I feel guilty for is keeping this side of me from the church, and not being true to myself.

 

[EasterJoy]

This isn’t something for a typical confession. Catch your pastor and see when you can meet with him about your situation. You need to come back, but you’ll do better if you have your immediate shepherd helping you to do it.

 

[tawny]

I am probably not posting this in the right place but I know you nice people will help me.

I was confirmed in the Catholic church a year ago. Everything was going wonderfully, RCIA was amazing, the people going through it with me, the sponsors, it was just beautiful. Then afterwards some of my peers ugliness surfaced, and I let it affect me so deeply that I have only been to mass 3 times since May, and I haven’t been to confession since. I have been struggling with my beliefs my whole entire life, leaning towards paganism, and after I disagreed with some of my fellow catholics, a woman popped into my life who is Wiccan. I started going to her house for classes, i.e. learning about herbs, candles, and stones. Now my inner turmoil is calming a little and I know in my heart that I belong in the catholic church, but I also know in my heart that I can’t conform to EVERYTHING that the church teaches. I’m ok with gay people and I’m ok with pagans and people of differing religions. So having said all of this, I really want to get back into the church and recieve communion. However I need to go to confession first, but the problem is, I don’t feel guilty for partaking in wiccan classes. I don’t feel that I did anything wrong by studying these things, because I did not practice anything. I didn’t EVER pray to any other Gods, anytime my friends said a spell, I said a prayer similar to what there spell was and directed toward God. I never took part in tarot, or astrology, or divination. However I do not feel that they did anything wrong by doing these things, as long as they did not force them on me. So in my eyes I did not commit a sin, but in some of my peers’ eyes I did. How can I admit guilt for something that I don’t feel guilty for? How do I solve this problem? The only thing I feel guilty for is keeping this side of me from the church, and not being true to myself.

You need to discuss this with your priest.

 

[Dorothy]

And remember to ask our Blessed Mother to pray for you!

With regard to gay people…we need to love all people and desire their good, in union with our Lord. But that doesn’t mean we are to approve of their actions if they are living the life style.

With God all things are possible to endure, and that goes for all of us in any difficult situation we may be in.,

Our Lord has made His grace available to us. Thanks be to the Lord!

 

[WiccanWoman]

You can tell by my screen name what religion I follow.

I agree 100% with the above posters. Take time to make an appointment, and when meeting, be very clear in explaining to your Priest/Pastor/Spiritual Advisor your predicament, what you’ve done, and why you are feeling uneasy.

It is my personal opinion as a Catholic by birth who attended Catholic schools and also took classes in/by other religions, I was informed by more than one Catholic Priest and Professor during college (St. John’s University in Queens, NY) that the careful study of any area in pursuit of wholesome knowledge is not sinful unless you allow it to lead you into actual sin. Using the advice which was given to me, if as you say, you only attended/observed Circle and did not worship in the name of the God/dess that may have been used at that event, that you said prayers using the name of the Catholic God, that would be like attending services at Synagogue, sitting in a Quaker meeting, being present for prayer at a Mosque, etc. You’re not a “believer” - you’re an observer. Your advisor may consider what you’ve done as walking a very fine line and may worry that you might easily be influenced to actually practice a religion other than Catholicism. I would not blame him at all as I see it that way, too, due to your expression of acceptance of what people of my faith do, and how we do it.

There is a problem unique to religions equated with the terms Pagan, Wiccan, Heathen, etc., as folks tend to equate them immediately with evil, and disrespect of (their) God, a practice of Satanism, etc. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I have a particular pet peeve – when some folks use the word “occult,” mangling it by saying “occultic” and “practicing occultism.” The word itself is an innocent one. Its original meaning is, quite simply, that which is “hidden.” From the Merriam-Webster Dictionary:

origin - Latin occultare, frequentative of occulere

First Known Use: 1500

as verb - to shut off from view or exposure - also to cover, eclipse

examples:

<the actor’s private life had long been occulted by a contrived public persona>

as adjective -

1: not revealed : secret
2: not easily apprehended or understood : abstruse, mysterious
3: hidden from view : concealed
4: of or relating to the occult [that which is hidden]
5: not manifest or detectable by clinical methods alone ; also : not present in macroscopic amounts

— oc·cult·ly - adverb

If you’ve ever been to a doctor who needs to run tests to see if blood is in a stool sample, they classify it as a test for “fecal occult blood.” Does that mean that the blood is practicing non-Christian acts? Of course not. The mysteries of any religion can be labeled occult, because they are hidden, and must be studied to be learned. Keep that in mind should you be wrongfully accused of “occult practices.”

Anyhow, be clear and honest when speaking with your Priest/Advisor. You can’t fully practice any religion with your whole heart unless you unburden yourself of any worries and misunderstanding you may have.

I hope you be blessed with peace of mind.

 

[MomaMary8]

I agree that you need to talk to your priest. He should be able to help you sort out the things that are causing you inner turmoil. A good priest should help you examine what you are going through and help determine if you have sinned and what you have done that was sinful. Remember, it is not your eyes or your peers’ eyes that we must judge our sinfulness, but God’s eyes. It is said that the just man sins 7 times a day and I know I am a far cry from being called a “just woman.” I need to strive to have all my works begin and end with Him, if I am doing things that do not begin with God in mind, then I must ask why I was doing them… should I continue to do them…am I truly sorry and willing to avoid doing them again…

Here are the 5 steps to a good confession:

1. Examine your conscience.
2. Be sincerely sorry for your sins.
3. Confess your sins.
4. Resolve to amend your life.
5. After your confession, do the penance the priest assigns

May God bless and keep you!

.

 

[EasterJoy]

…There is a problem unique to religions equated with the terms Pagan, Wiccan, Heathen, etc., as folks tend to equate them immediately with evil, and disrespect of (their) God, a practice of Satanism, etc. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I have a particular pet peeve – when some folks use the word “occult,” mangling it by saying “occultic” and “practicing occultism.” The word itself is an innocent one. Its original meaning is, quite simply, that which is “hidden.” …The mysteries of any religion can be labeled occult, because they are hidden, and must be studied to be learned. Keep that in mind should you be wrongfully accused of “occult practices”…

With all due respect, WiccanWoman, you were either misinformed during your Catholic formation or else have forgotten what you were taught.

You have to keep in mind that to a Catholic there isn’t “our God” and “your God”. There is the one True God, and there are false gods. This is not to say that there are not real unseen spirits or that people cannot practice a false religion with honest and perhaps even praiseworthy intention capable of pleasing God (who alone reads hearts). I mean that by the First Commandment human beings are forbidden from trying to bring these powers under their sway. This is because those who are obedient to God will help us by the bidding of God, and those who are not obedient to God don’t have any scruples about lying, deceit, or spiritual conquest of blind stupid babies in the woods like us. There is no one in the spirit world that is in a big hurry to be our personal servant. Really–think about it! Except those who are in reality serving a greater power than either of us, why would any spirit of such power put himself at our beck and call?

The main problem with Wicca and all the other modern incarnations of witchcraft is that there is no single understanding of what on earth “powers” there are out there. There is no ultimate “good”, but just the good as it is perceived by a limited human being. More to the point, the spiritual goal is to “harness” or “redirect” spiritual powers, not to learn the will of God, become obedient to God, and get one’s power to do good from the graces Providence provides. I do not know why the danger of this is not obvious. Hidden, I guess!

More to the point, having anything to do with spiritual practices that are not overtly and totally done in service of the one True God is absolutely forbidden to us. Period. Certainly it is not allowed to pretend to join in prayers to false gods or to equate the one True God with false divinities that the practitioners all around you believe have nothing to do with the one true God, the Trinity of whom Our Lord Jesus Christ is the Second Person. (Please pay particular attention to CCC 2117, OP–text follows.)

 

[EasterJoy]

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church:

**III. “YOU SHALL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE ME” **

2110 The first commandment forbids honoring gods other than the one Lord who has revealed himself to his people. It proscribes superstition and irreligion. Superstition in some sense represents a perverse excess of religion; irreligion is the vice contrary by defect to the virtue of religion.

**Superstition **

**2111 **Superstition is the deviation of religious feeling and of the practices this feeling imposes. It can even affect the worship we offer the true God, e.g., when one attributes an importance in some way magical to certain practices otherwise lawful or necessary. To attribute the efficacy of prayers or of sacramental signs to their mere external performance, apart from the interior dispositions that they demand, is to fall into superstition.41

**Idolatry **

**2112 **The first commandment condemns polytheism. It requires man neither to believe in, nor to venerate, other divinities than the one true God. Scripture constantly recalls this rejection of “idols, [of] silver and gold, the work of men’s hands. They have mouths, but do not speak; eyes, but do not see.” These empty idols make their worshippers empty: "Those who make them are like them; so are all who trust in them."42 God, however, is the "living God"43 who gives life and intervenes in history.

2113 Idolatry not only refers to false pagan worship. It remains a constant temptation to faith. Idolatry consists in divinizing what is not God. Man commits idolatry whenever he honors and reveres a creature in place of God, whether this be gods or demons (for example, satanism), power, pleasure, race, ancestors, the state, money, etc. Jesus says, "You cannot serve God and mammon."44 Many martyrs died for not adoring "the Beast"45 refusing even to simulate such worship. Idolatry rejects the unique Lordship of God; it is therefore incompatible with communion with God.46

**2114 **Human life finds its unity in the adoration of the one God. The commandment to worship the Lord alone integrates man and saves him from an endless disintegration. Idolatry is a perversion of man’s innate religious sense. An idolater is someone who "transfers his indestructible notion of God to anything other than God."47

**Divination and magic **

2115 God can reveal the future to his prophets or to other saints. Still, a sound Christian attitude consists in putting oneself confidently into the hands of Providence for whatever concerns the future, and giving up all unhealthy curiosity about it. Improvidence, however, can constitute a lack of responsibility.

**2116 **All forms of divination are to be rejected: recourse to Satan or demons, conjuring up the dead or other practices falsely supposed to “unveil” the future.48 Consulting horoscopes, astrology, palm reading, interpretation of omens and lots, the phenomena of clairvoyance, and recourse to mediums all conceal a desire for power over time, history, and, in the last analysis, other human beings, as well as a wish to conciliate hidden powers. They contradict the honor, respect, and loving fear that we owe to God alone.

2117 All practices of magic or sorcery, by which one attempts to tame occult powers, so as to place them at one’s service and have a supernatural power over others - even if this were for the sake of restoring their health - are gravely contrary to the virtue of religion. These practices are even more to be condemned when accompanied by the intention of harming someone, or when they have recourse to the intervention of demons. Wearing charms is also reprehensible. Spiritism often implies divination or magical practices; the Church for her part warns the faithful against it. Recourse to so-called traditional cures does not justify either the invocation of evil powers or the exploitation of another’s credulity.

 

[Dorothy]

Easter Joy,

Thank you for both of those posts!

 

[WiccanWoman]

B]Certainly it is not allowed to pretend to join in prayers to false gods or to equate the one True God with false divinities that the practitioners all around you believe have nothing to do with the one true God, the Trinity of whom Our Lord Jesus Christ is the Second Person.

…and the original poster did no such thing. In fact, the O/P indicated:

I did not practice anything. I didn’t EVER pray to any other Gods, anytime my friends said a spell, I said a prayer similar to what there spell was and directed toward God.

The O/P didn’t say s/he “pretended” anything. Additionally, s/he did not blaspheme, did not take God’s name in vain, did not pray to a false god, etc.

I identified with the O/P because I meet with a group of women of several different religions and we all pray together. Some of our words may be different, but our intent is the same. We are not ashamed to pray in each other’s company for the good of mankind as a whole, and for one another. If the woman on my left inserts the name of Jesus into our prayer, and the woman on my right names Allah, and the woman in front of me calls upon El Shaddai, and the woman behind whispers to Shekhinah, or Brahman, or quite simply, God… they are not reproached, and none of us are required to pray in a certain fashion with certain words. In fact, some non-English-speaking guests have used their native languages, and I cannot say what they prayed. Regardless, we hold hands together in peace and harmony, and we offer our prayers together as women, as sisters.

When we do this, I do not believe that anyone “pretends” to pray in one way or another. We pray from our hearts. To do otherwise would be a deception, and I do not believe by what is said by the O/P that any deception took place. None takes place among my prayer groups, either. (If the O/P gives further details, and it turns out I am mistaken, of course I’ll apologize.)

I’ll grant that the O/P’s use of the word “spells” does irk me… a lot. If what the others were doing was an attempt to somehow manipulate someone, well, that’s just wrong. I cannot possibly generalize on all who practice my faith or a form thereof. I can speak only for myself the few I know personally. Our belief is similar to the computer term “GIGO” - garbage in, garbage out… and so, making any attempt at forcibly bending someone to do your will is both wrong and immoral, and can lead only to disaster. People of most all religions have been known to pray for such results, but I won’t even do that. I’m only a human being. It’s not my place to know or pretend to know how things are supposed to be.

It is in that light, and that light only, that I chose to believe the O/P’s words, and joined in giving the wise advice to seek the (name removed by moderator)ut of their Spiritual Advisor… “You can’t fully practice any religion with your whole heart unless you unburden yourself of any worries and misunderstanding you may have.”

I won’t derail the O/P’s thread any further.

Namaste.

 

[lit_lover88]

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church:

**III. “YOU SHALL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE ME” **

2110 The first commandment forbids honoring gods other than the one Lord who has revealed himself to his people. It proscribes superstition and irreligion. Superstition in some sense represents a perverse excess of religion; irreligion is the vice contrary by defect to the virtue of religion.

**Superstition **

**2111 **Superstition is the deviation of religious feeling and of the practices this feeling imposes. It can even affect the worship we offer the true God, e.g., when one attributes an importance in some way magical to certain practices otherwise lawful or necessary. To attribute the efficacy of prayers or of sacramental signs to their mere external performance, apart from the interior dispositions that they demand, is to fall into superstition.41

**Idolatry **

**2112 **The first commandment condemns polytheism. It requires man neither to believe in, nor to venerate, other divinities than the one true God. Scripture constantly recalls this rejection of “idols, [of] silver and gold, the work of men’s hands. They have mouths, but do not speak; eyes, but do not see.” These empty idols make their worshippers empty: "Those who make them are like them; so are all who trust in them."42 God, however, is the "living God"43 who gives life and intervenes in history.

2113 Idolatry not only refers to false pagan worship. It remains a constant temptation to faith. Idolatry consists in divinizing what is not God. Man commits idolatry whenever he honors and reveres a creature in place of God, whether this be gods or demons (for example, satanism), power, pleasure, race, ancestors, the state, money, etc. Jesus says, "You cannot serve God and mammon."44 Many martyrs died for not adoring "the Beast"45 refusing even to simulate such worship. Idolatry rejects the unique Lordship of God; it is therefore incompatible with communion with God.46

**2114 **Human life finds its unity in the adoration of the one God. The commandment to worship the Lord alone integrates man and saves him from an endless disintegration. Idolatry is a perversion of man’s innate religious sense. An idolater is someone who "transfers his indestructible notion of God to anything other than God."47

**Divination and magic **

2115 God can reveal the future to his prophets or to other saints. Still, a sound Christian attitude consists in putting oneself confidently into the hands of Providence for whatever concerns the future, and giving up all unhealthy curiosity about it. Improvidence, however, can constitute a lack of responsibility.

**2116 **All forms of divination are to be rejected: recourse to Satan or demons, conjuring up the dead or other practices falsely supposed to “unveil” the future.48 Consulting horoscopes, astrology, palm reading, interpretation of omens and lots, the phenomena of clairvoyance, and recourse to mediums all conceal a desire for power over time, history, and, in the last analysis, other human beings, as well as a wish to conciliate hidden powers. They contradict the honor, respect, and loving fear that we owe to God alone.

2117 All practices of magic or sorcery, by which one attempts to tame occult powers, so as to place them at one’s service and have a supernatural power over others - even if this were for the sake of restoring their health - are gravely contrary to the virtue of religion. These practices are even more to be condemned when accompanied by the intention of harming someone, or when they have recourse to the intervention of demons. Wearing charms is also reprehensible. Spiritism often implies divination or magical practices; the Church for her part warns the faithful against it. Recourse to so-called traditional cures does not justify either the invocation of evil powers or the exploitation of another’s credulity.

yeah, i just said I didn’t put “any other gods before HIM” and I didn’t practice anything…

 

[lit_lover88]

Also, WiccanWomen, I did not mean to offend you with my use of the term “spells” I only used that term because thats what my friends say. They use that word very loosely, and no they do not try to bend the will of others in their practice, they are wholeheartedly against that.

 

[gardenswithkids]

I am probably not posting this in the right place but I know you nice people will help me.

I was confirmed in the Catholic church a year ago. Everything was going wonderfully, RCIA was amazing, the people going through it with me, the sponsors, it was just beautiful. Then afterwards some of my peers ugliness surfaced, and I let it affect me so deeply that I have only been to mass 3 times since May, and I haven’t been to confession since…

Others have suggested making an appointment with a priest for Confession. I think that’s a great idea if you know a really good priest and can meet with him sometime very soon. However, if that extra step of having to contact and set up an appointment keeps you from promptly getting to Confession, just find a nice parish that offers frequent Confessions and go to Confession. Please go.

As I read your post, I want to address something else too. Please do not let the sins, failings and imperfections of other Catholics keep you away from the Church! We’re not perfect–none of us. There’s a reason why Jesus instituted the Sacrament of Confession. It wasn’t just for you–it’s for all of us, including whoever it was in your RCIA that disappointed you.

You fell away from the Church a very short time after you joined Her. Whatever the other problems the people in RCIA had, it seems that they did not do a good job of preparing you for spiritual attacks. Please, please, please do not let anything keep you away from the Confessional.