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Pete_1
Guest
In principle is it a sin to enter into a relationship with someone who after a few months you may never see again e.g they are moving to another country?
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Pete_1
Guest
No one?
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love4mary
Guest
Define what you mean by “Relationship”.
If you mean a relationship based on friendship, then this is a good thing and hardly a sin.
But if you mean a romantic relationship, maybe not a sin (assuming you are keeping it chaste), but hardly advisable if you know you will never see this person again. Why “play” with emotions in this manner. Someone will be hurt.
If you mean a relationship based on friendship, then this is a good thing and hardly a sin.
But if you mean a romantic relationship, maybe not a sin (assuming you are keeping it chaste), but hardly advisable if you know you will never see this person again. Why “play” with emotions in this manner. Someone will be hurt.
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Pete_1
Guest
I mean the latter.
But don’t you think that being able to spend at least some time with a person is better than none at all?
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love4mary
Guest
That would depend on how serious the relationship got. If it progressed to the point where you fall in love, then the parting will be incredibly painful for both of you.
But if kept on the friendship level, then yes, a relationship may be wonderful for both. It all depends on the levels of feelings you both experience.
But if kept on the friendship level, then yes, a relationship may be wonderful for both. It all depends on the levels of feelings you both experience.
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Padilla7921
Guest
How far are you guys going to be apart when you split?
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RosaryFan
Guest
Why not? There would be nothing wrong with starting a romantic relationship (presuming you keep it chaste, of course). Even if the person is moving to another country, who’s to say they won’t ever move back or meet up with you again? You may be nurturing a relationship that could continue at a future time. Things can always change. I’d say go for it! You can’t deny your feelings of affection for someone. If that was the case, I wouldn’t have married my husband because he may die some day and leave me forever - with a broken heart.
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Catholic_Dude
Guest
But it is wrong to build up hopes and get attached for something that wont last.
It’s similar reasoning why mixed marriages (a Catholic marrying a non-Catholic) are not good for practical purposes.
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RosaryFan
Guest
What do you mean by “wrong”? Do you mean it’s a sin? What if both parties enter into this relationship freely and knowing full well it will end shortly, but do so anyway because they enjoy each other’s company? Why is it “wrong” to enjoy each other’s company before they have to part? This is, of course, presuming they practice celibacy, as they should. If both parties understand the relationship is temporary, then I would think there isn’t much building of hopes.
Love happens. Sometimes it changes the course of our lives. How do you know if this couple falls in love, the person who is leaving the country won’t change their mind and stay, or that the person staying won’t agree to go with the person leaving the country?
Lastly, I know many couples who are mixed religions, and their marriages are strong and loving. In fact, in many instances, it’s a wonderful ingredient for conversion of the non-Catholic half of the marriage to the Catholic faith. I think God places us with whomever we need for our salvation.
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Catholic_Dude
Guest
I mean “wrong” in the sense that it could lead to emptional problems and cause emotional pain, not that it is a sin.
What you are describing can be taken on two levels. It is perfectly fine to want to get to know someone before they leave. But if this knowledge is based on feelings of long term relationship, like marriage, then it is a bad idea. Dating is not to get to casually know someone, but rather to see if that someone would be a compatible future spouse. If you know for sure your encounter will be short lived, it is a abuse of dating to get romantically involved rather than a non-dating friendship.
I don’t, but this should not be based on wishful thinking. If someone really has to move away you should keep that in mind and not try to get emotionally entangled to the point of a heart wrenching separation when it finally occurs. Yes feelings of love happen and are important, but that should not cloud proper judgment.
There are such things as strong and loving mixed marriages, but that is not only not the ideal, the Catholic has an added burden on themself (and if the non-Catholic is not Baptized then it isnt even sacramental marriage). Further, there are plenty of mixed marriages out there which actually put the Catholic party in danger and hold back growth, sending mixed messages to the children and even hindering the children from growth in the Catholic faith.
The very fact the spouses are not on the same page spiritually/theologically (which is the definition of a mixed marriage) is solid proof it is not ideal, and if the other spouse is just as serious about their faith as the Catholic is makes it a house divided by definition. Imagine getting married and not being able to have the Holy Eucharist along side with your spouse!
That is not something any Catholic should take lightly.
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Just_wondering
Guest
I don’t think it’s sinful to enter a relationship that you’re not sure you can continue. When I started falling in love with my now-boyfriend, I hesitated to do or say anything about it because he was scheduled to leave the country in a few months. I didn’t want to get involved and have my heart broken.
Fast-forward to three weeks before he’s leaving. We’re both guests at a mutual friend’s birthday party. My now-boyfriend mentions that his boss offered him another contract to stay a year longer at his job, and that he’d decided to turn it down and had bought a ticket home instead. At that point, I couldn’t help it and I started crying, right there at the party! :crying: I was deeply embarrassed, and my now-boyfriend took me outside to talk about it and calm me down. Turns out he felt the same way, but didn’t want to get involved because he was leaving. Anyway, he took the second contract and stayed an extra year here because of me. Now he’s gone home to his country and we’re in a long distance relationship, until we can organize visas for something more permanent (i.e. marriage).
Just because someone’s plans for the future don’t match with yours, that doesn’t mean you should abandon all thoughts of seeing whether the relationship has merit. Plans change, especially for love. If I had buried my feelings, I might have lived my whole life wondering whether I’d ever meet another man as wonderful as the one I’d let leave without saying anything. I’m so glad we decided to give it a chance.
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RosaryFan
Guest
Beautifully put!I don’t think it’s sinful to enter a relationship that you’re not sure you can continue. When I started falling in love with my now-boyfriend, I hesitated to do or say anything about it because he was scheduled to leave the country in a few months. I didn’t want to get involved and have my heart broken.
Fast-forward to three weeks before he’s leaving. We’re both guests at a mutual friend’s birthday party. My now-boyfriend mentions that his boss offered him another contract to stay a year longer at his job, and that he’d decided to turn it down and had bought a ticket home instead. At that point, I couldn’t help it and I started crying, right there at the party! :crying: I was deeply embarrassed, and my now-boyfriend took me outside to talk about it and calm me down. Turns out he felt the same way, but didn’t want to get involved because he was leaving. Anyway, he took the second contract and stayed an extra year here because of me. Now he’s gone home to his country and we’re in a long distance relationship, until we can organize visas for something more permanent (i.e. marriage).
Just because someone’s plans for the future don’t match with yours, that doesn’t mean you should abandon all thoughts of seeing whether the relationship has merit. Plans change, especially for love. If I had buried my feelings, I might have lived my whole life wondering whether I’d ever meet another man as wonderful as the one I’d let leave without saying anything. I’m so glad we decided to give it a chance.
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Howard_Roark
Guest
It all seems pretty cold to me…no room for falling in love. No great love story ever began “We knew our relationship would end on August the 5th…”
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