Help with an unusual issue

[Girlio]

Hello -

I am a sensitive… or an empath as it is more commonly known outside of the Catholic Church. I posted a few days ago looking for people with similar experiences and I was given some great advice about books to read about particular saints and ways to find a spiritual director or priest to talk to… (thank you, by the way) but I have an additional need.

My workplace is toxic. Particularly my boss. She is emotionally volatile and is probably a narcissist though it is not within my professional ability to diagnose her as such. I take on her energy at all times and she drains me very quickly if she’s in her office. I’ve worked for her for three years and have known the entire time that her energy was draining to me but this year has been particularly difficult for our organization and she is worse than ever!

This afternoon was the last straw. I was in the office alone, feeling great, and then she came in with another person and they had a heated conversation that lasted an hour. During this hour I started to get cramps, then pains in my arms, a headache, nausea and by the time they left, but I was completely exhausted. That was at 2pm and I still have not recovered completely.

This happens all the time. I am working toward leaving the organization, but that will not be possible for a while. In the meantime I need a way to block her energy so that I am not being constantly drained.

To be clear, this is not a problem I have only with my boss. I pick up the emotions, physical pains and feelings of others on a regular basis, but she is becoming a health risk for me.

I know I need to talk to a priest, but as I currently don’t know one that I trust, that could take a while. I know there are empaths on these forums. Can someone PLEASE tell me any methods you use to protect yourself from this outside on a regular basis outside of the sacraments? Any specific prayers? Any rituals? Meditations? ANYTHING?

You can PM me if you need to… but please if you can offer anything I would appreciate it. I do know an empath in real life who uses white light and crystals to manage this “gift”… so I know there is something that will work (no, it’s not hooey…) but I would like to find something in Christianity because I don’t really want to go down the crystals road… if I don’t find something soon though, I will…

Please don’t tell me this is my imagination. It’s not.

Thank you!

 

[elohimrules]

I am very sensitive to others emotions because I grew up in an alcoholic home. I was the one to sense the pain for everyone and could feel the heaviness of silence. As an adult Alanon taught me how to seperate myself from others or its called “detatching” setting boundaries with not just your words but with your emotions. Dont know if that helps or not.

 

[Girlio]

I am very sensitive to others emotions because I grew up in an alcoholic home. I was the one to sense the pain for everyone and could feel the heaviness of silence. As an adult Alanon taught me how to seperate myself from others or its called “detatching” setting boundaries with not just your words but with your emotions. Dont know if that helps or not.

Hi! I’ve been working on that as well and it does help… I didn’t grow up in an alcoholic family, but I might check out Alanon online and see if I can find something new that will be beneficial. Thanks!

 

[Lookingforjoy]

Could you maybe pray to God and turn the situation and pain over to Him? Or ask for intervention from an appropriate saint? Sort of feel the emotion, acknowledge the emotion, and then imagine it passing on to God.

 

[pianistclare]

I know I need to talk to a priest, but as I currently don’t know one that I trust, that could take a while. I know there are empaths on these forums. Can someone PLEASE tell me any methods you use to protect yourself from this outside on a regular basis outside of the sacraments? Any specific prayers? Any rituals? Meditations? ANYTHING?

You can PM me if you need to… but please if you can offer anything I would appreciate it. I do know an empath in real life who uses white light and crystals to manage this “gift”… so I know there is something that will work (no, it’s not hooey…) but I would like to find something in Christianity because I don’t really want to go down the crystals road… if I don’t find something soon though, I will…

We’re mostly Catholic here. We utilize prayer to solve our problems. A well and sincerely prayer Our Father will do infinitely more for you than those crystals. (and yeah, it is hooey, sorry.)

Why don’t you trust priests? They are very trustworthy. Unless you’re afraid of what he will say.
He’ll likely ask you to put your trust in God, not “stuff”.
Good luck.

 

[Girlio]

Could you maybe pray to God and turn the situation and pain over to Him? Or ask for intervention from an appropriate saint? Sort of feel the emotion, acknowledge the emotion, and then imagine it passing on to God.

Hello - Yes, that is a very good idea, and that is what I do as a first course of action, always, and most of the time it works. It is unfortunate that this woman is in constant chaos and we’re in the same room 8 hours a day. That is why I’m searching for… I don’t know what…

Thank you!

 

[esieffe]

Avoid using crystals and related tools. These things reside in the occult realm and will “twist” any spiritual gifts and sensitivities you may have.

Take care.
-E

 

[HNA444]

What about wearing a cross necklace or pendant of a saint, and just hold it dear to you when these situations arise. Might help you to calm down. And also, I like this short prayer: ‘O Holy Spirit, sweet guest of my soul, abide in me and grant that I may ever abide in Thee.’

 

[Girlio]

We’re mostly Catholic here. We utilize prayer to solve our problems. A well and sincerely prayer Our Father will do infinitely more for you than those crystals. (and yeah, it is hooey, sorry.)

Why don’t you trust priests? They are very trustworthy. Unless you’re afraid of what he will say.
He’ll likely ask you to put your trust in God, not “stuff”.
Good luck.

Yes, I know you are mostly Catholic here. I was born and raised Catholic and still want to be Catholic which is why I am asking for advice on a Catholic board instead of some place else.

Please don’t read any snark into this reply. I do not intend to be snarky in any way.

We could have a very long chat over crystals being hooey and I suspect we would never agree. You wouldn’t warn kids about stranger danger if strangers weren’t dangerous… would you? Seems that would be a silly waste of time.

You question why I don’t trust priests? It’s not all priests I don’t trust. I have met several wonderful priests in my lifetime, however we no longer live near each other and aren’t in contact anymore. I suppose I could get in contact with them and no, I wouldn’t fear what they had to say on this topic…

I could also ask the Sister who first told me that I was a “sensitive”… (She did me a great service that day. My life improved dramatically!) but she was recently elected Prioress so she’s extremely busy and I don’t feel like I should bother her right now. Also, she is not a sensitive so she finds it hard to relate to me in that way.

I do have reasons not to trust individual priests, but I don’t apply those reasons as a blanket to every ordained person I meet. I know five people first hand who suffered sexual abuse in the Catholic school system that I attended as a child… soooo that was the first reason I ever had not to trust a priest. Seems legit.

Currently, I live in a very small, rural location. I know my priest as a priest… but also socially. He is manipulative. He mocks people behind their backs. He doesn’t keep secret things confidential. He is often drunk. I suppose I AM afraid of what he will say… to the other people in town… about my confidential information.

I will continue to pray for the people I “feel”… and for some relief for myself because I am exhausted. Thanks.

 

[Girlio]

Avoid using crystals and related tools. These things reside in the occult realm and will “twist” any spiritual gifts and sensitivities you may have.

Take care.
-E

Yes, I am aware of that… I’ve seen it happen to others. That is why I’m looking for suggestions, I have no desire to go that route, but the stuff I know isn’t working. I’m just so frustrated today. I think this lady is going to hurt my health!

 

[Bluebright]

Well firstly I must say I am sorry you are suffering. My opinion follows, just that. Then I must strongly urge you not to go the route of crystals and things, that will likely lead to the occult which is one of the devils tricks. You do not want to be tricked do you? think of poor Eve, don’t enter into any chat with the devil.

You don’t need to trust the priest, trust God, he will speak through the priest. Go to confession (sounds weird but hear me out). You are being tempted now, by this distress and bombardment of negative feelings from your boss. If you confess this distress and your temptation to go the crystal route to your priest and ask for help, he will advise you and Jesus will speak through him. I have done this and I cannot even tell you how much it helped, my priest was like an angel he consoled me and told me what to do. Mostly stay calm and pray and read the scriptures but put in a far better, personal way than that.

I don’t think I am totally an empath like you, but I am certainly affected by people’s emotions and have always felt in tune with how others are feeling or the general ‘feeling’ of people. As a child it was always, don’t shout or speak loudly near me in case I cry, lol. I was constantly called sensitive. I still am but hide it better as an adult. My belief in God means I know he shares this little sensitivity with me to help others. It is quite hard at times I agree.

Anyway go to your priest, don’t try handle this on your own, I promise you it will not be the first time he has heard this and his first reaction will likely be compassion. In the mean read some works of the saints, many of them had gifts and were tempted. St Faustina always fled to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I too find this comforting. Many would pray the rosary, you may find this helps. Remember though these are sacramentals (if blessed) and not to be used as some sort of superstitious thing (like crystals) and so they infer grace if used properly but aren’t grace in themselves.

Finally, see the face of Jesus in your boss and work on forgiveness and begin treating her as if she were the most loved saviour and you may find you can lessen the bad feelings a little. Mention you wish this in confession too. God bless

 

[ChurchSoldier]

Hi! I’ve been working on that as well and it does help… I didn’t grow up in an alcoholic family, but I might check out Alanon online and see if I can find something new that will be beneficial. Thanks!

www.adultchildren.org

 

[pianistclare]

Yes, I know you are mostly Catholic here. I was born and raised Catholic and still want to be Catholic which is why I am asking for advice on a Catholic board instead of some place else.

Please don’t read any snark into this reply. I do not intend to be snarky in any way.

We could have a very long chat over crystals being hooey and I suspect we would never agree. You wouldn’t warn kids about stranger danger if strangers weren’t dangerous… would you? Seems that would be a silly waste of time.

You question why I don’t trust priests? It’s not all priests I don’t trust. I have met several wonderful priests in my lifetime, however we no longer live near each other and aren’t in contact anymore. I suppose I could get in contact with them and no, I wouldn’t fear what they had to say on this topic…

I could also ask the Sister who first told me that I was a “sensitive”… (She did me a great service that day. My life improved dramatically!) but she was recently elected Prioress so she’s extremely busy and I don’t feel like I should bother her right now. Also, she is not a sensitive so she finds it hard to relate to me in that way.

I do have reasons not to trust individual priests, but I don’t apply those reasons as a blanket to every ordained person I meet. I know five people first hand who suffered sexual abuse in the Catholic school system that I attended as a child… soooo that was the first reason I ever had not to trust a priest. Seems legit.

Currently, I live in a very small, rural location. I know my priest as a priest… but also socially. He is manipulative. He mocks people behind their backs. He doesn’t keep secret things confidential. He is often drunk. I suppose I AM afraid of what he will say… to the other people in town… about my confidential information.

I will continue to pray for the people I “feel”… and for some relief for myself because I am exhausted. Thanks.

What are you talking about? I didn’t read any “snark” in your post???
You didn’t put down any faith. People sort of assume that when they do that the OP is not Catholic. You’re the one who said you can’t find a priest you trust.

One priest is a problem. I know one like that too. Find another one.
I’m not sure why you get upset that people respond to exactly what you wrote.
I’m being honest.
You are sensitive.
Check.

I’ll unsubscribe.

 

[Girlio]

What are you talking about? I didn’t read any “snark” in your post???
You didn’t put down any faith. People sort of assume that when they do that the OP is not Catholic. You’re the one who said you can’t find a priest you trust.

One priest is a problem. I know one like that too. Find another one.
I’m not sure why you get upset that people respond to exactly what you wrote.
I’m being honest.
You are sensitive.
Check.

I’ll unsubscribe.

You’re right, I didn’t put down any faith. My mistake. I’m glad you didn’t read any snark because there wasn’t supposed to be any. Ha! I put that in there because I was having such a horrible day that I might have been snarky without intention.

I think it’s best that you do unsubscribe. I’m not sure our personalities are compatible.

 

[Girlio]

www.adultchildren.org

Thank you! I will check it out!

 

[Girlio]

Well firstly I must say I am sorry you are suffering. My opinion follows, just that. Then I must strongly urge you not to go the route of crystals and things, that will likely lead to the occult which is one of the devils tricks. You do not want to be tricked do you? think of poor Eve, don’t enter into any chat with the devil.

You don’t need to trust the priest, trust God, he will speak through the priest. Go to confession (sounds weird but hear me out). You are being tempted now, by this distress and bombardment of negative feelings from your boss. If you confess this distress and your temptation to go the crystal route to your priest and ask for help, he will advise you and Jesus will speak through him. I have done this and I cannot even tell you how much it helped, my priest was like an angel he consoled me and told me what to do. Mostly stay calm and pray and read the scriptures but put in a far better, personal way than that.

I don’t think I am totally an empath like you, but I am certainly affected by people’s emotions and have always felt in tune with how others are feeling or the general ‘feeling’ of people. As a child it was always, don’t shout or speak loudly near me in case I cry, lol. I was constantly called sensitive. I still am but hide it better as an adult. My belief in God means I know he shares this little sensitivity with me to help others. It is quite hard at times I agree.

Anyway go to your priest, don’t try handle this on your own, I promise you it will not be the first time he has heard this and his first reaction will likely be compassion. In the mean read some works of the saints, many of them had gifts and were tempted. St Faustina always fled to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I too find this comforting. Many would pray the rosary, you may find this helps. Remember though these are sacramentals (if blessed) and not to be used as some sort of superstitious thing (like crystals) and so they infer grace if used properly but aren’t grace in themselves.

Finally, see the face of Jesus in your boss and work on forgiveness and begin treating her as if she were the most loved saviour and you may find you can lessen the bad feelings a little. Mention you wish this in confession too. God bless

Hello! Thank you for this very thoughtful reply. I will find a priest in a neighboring town and see if I can get something scheduled. I simply do not feel comfortable talking to the local priest about this topic. Anyway, your reply helped me quite a bit. I appreciate it.

 

[Bluebright]

Hello! Thank you for this very thoughtful reply. I will find a priest in a neighboring town and see if I can get something scheduled. I simply do not feel comfortable talking to the local priest about this topic. Anyway, your reply helped me quite a bit. I appreciate it.

I’m glad I could help a little. I have had problems with a boss before in a terrible time in my life, it was dire, I empathise.

I’m sorry I didn’t see what you said about your priest before replying. I see your issues and will pray for him and you (and your parish). It makes me appreciate my priest even more (and all those I have ever known/met). God bless you