Help with overcoming masturbation.

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I am currently 15 right now, and I have been committing this terrible sin for two years. I go to Reconciliation every week, but I cannot get over the weekness of the flesh. And, I am too embarrassed to tell my father or my spiritual advisor about my addiction. I also know that it is an interference with my calling to the priesthood. I don’t know what to do. I would appreciate your help. Thanks.
 
WAC said:
I am currently 15 right now, and I have been committing this terrible sin for two years. I go to Reconciliation every week, but I cannot get over the weakness of the flesh. And, I am too embarrassed to tell my father or my spiritual adviser about my addiction. I also know that it is an interference with my calling to the priesthood. I don’t know what to do. I would appreciate your help. Thanks.
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Well you need to tell your Father during reconciliation as that would be one of the reasons you are there. I find the fact that it make me uncomfortable to make that confession very helpful in avoiding the sin. You are right the first time is tough, but it won’t kill you and in fact once you are finished being reconciled with God you will find strength in not doing it any more… oh make sure you are not going to Porn sites… In fact set your filters so you don’t get tempted. Kind of like an alcoholic needs to make sure they have no booze in their house just to avoid temptation.

God Bless you…keep on praying…
 
the best means in overcoming sins of the flesh, is prayer, and confession,
and i know by my own experiences, if you do reveal this sin to your confessor, that alone will be a great help in overcoming it, for one because the dread of confessing it again will really make you think twice, and also because by confessing, you will receive the special and necessary graces to overcome this sin,
one devotion that helped me greatly was saying 3 Hail Marys in the morning and at night for the intentions of purity and holiness, although it’s not an instant cure, but when i began that devotion, i noticed myself rapidly overcoming my sins, and i reached a point which i have since not sinned in that way again,

i know it’s humiliating and embarrassing, but your priest is there to help you, he became a priest to tend to wounded souls, and by revealing this to him, he will not be angry or repulsed, he will instead be glad, because then he can begin to work on your soul, he will pray for you and help you overcome this,
also keep in mind, your priest has more then likely heard this sin hundreds, if not thousands of times, and has also heard sins much more shameful, but do you think he is upset at people coming to him with these sins? not at all, it is a great joy when souls come to the confessional dead, but when absolved, they leave new and alive,

perhaps next time you see your priest, ask him if he can help you with a problem, but that you are afraid to say it out loud, because you are very embarrassed at the sin you have been committing, and it is very likely that he will know what you are talking about, or atleast it will not take him long to figure it out,

and other then that, just be patient with yourself, don’t let this cause you to be angry or bitter with yourself, because if you are going to overcome it, you need to do it by a calm and steady repentance, and not by violent passionate displeasure, because you can’t easily pick yourself up again by beating yourself down,
of course we should be sorry for our sins, but to get angry with ourselves over our sins is also a hidden pride, because it is not regarding ourselves as the weak creatures we truly are,

the best protection against these sins, and every other sin, is by praying for help at the moment of temptation, or even before being tempted, meaning throughout the day to ask for protection from falling into temptation,

well…that’s all for now, i hope this helps you, if you have any other questions please ask,
ok take care and i will be praying for you.
 
Pax Christi vobiscum,
I will do that, but I won’t be able to meet with my spiritual advisor this week. I am going on a retreat this weekend, and I will going to confession tomorrow, so I will aleast be able to recieve the Precious Body. Thank you for your prayers.
Gracias
 
I am in no way trying to minimize sin, but I have never heard of anyone overcoming sin that was this hard on themselves. You are 15, and there is a lot of crazy things going on developmentally in your body.

Pray, hope, and don’t worry. The more you focus on it, the more you are thinking about it, and the more likely you are to keep doing it. Take it easy on yourself, find some good literature on the topic, and focus on loving God and enjoying life more than focusing on sin. This is how many people I know have overcome these temptations. Christ came to make us free, not slaves, to sin! 😉
 
Some facts you might want to know:

I have spoken to two doctors about this subject. This is what they have told me:

(a) In some men, prolonged abstinence can lead to pain throughout the day due to pressure on the prostate. If you have frequent nocturnal emissions, that helps, but if not, good luck; I abstained for 3 weeks and felt like I had a mild of case of “blue balls” for days.
(b) Don’t expect it to get easier with time - that is, until you’re of, say, middle age and your testosterone decreases.
(c) Some men, however, never experience any pain with abstinence. Some end up in pretty bad straights - blood in their emissions, for example. It just depends on where you fall on the spectrum.

So, it’s simply untrue when people say that masturbation is just an addiction like nicotine or caffeine. There are some sex addicts, but more likely than not, you aren’t one.

– OAO
 
Going to Reconciliation every week is no good if you are intentionally holding back your sin. You need to confess this. I know it’s embarrassing (I was sooo nervous to say that in my first confession), but remaining in a state of sin will NOT help you overcome your masturbation habit. You need God’s grace for this fight, and unless you make an honest confession you’re cutting yourself off from your greatest Ally. Step one: confess!
 
Take this advice from someone who used to masturbate daily and had a terrible addiction to pornography.
I just read the bible, prayed, and fought hard, and it changed my life.

But I say to you, that whosoever shall look on a woman to lust after her, hath already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:28

Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, lust, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is the service of idols. Colossians 3:5

…every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour: Not in the passion of lust, like the Gentiles that know not God: Thessalonians 4:4-5

Now, just think about how much Jesus loves you. We are called to love eachother just as much as He loves us. So, before you go to masturbate,think about what you are about to do. Realize that action is not showing love towards the one whom you fantasize about. The fantasy just makes that person an object of self pleasure, which is not what Jesus wants. Don’t do it just because that is not showing love towards that person whom you are thinking about.
I know it is a hard battle, I struggled for almost a decade until God delivered me from that sin. Pray,pray, and pray! Ask God for His grace and He will help you be free from the problem. It is good you realize that it is wrong, which can give you even more motivation not to do it. I did it for awhile even knowing that it was wrong, that annoying conscience :rolleyes: I will pray for you and I just say do not give up in your struggle. I hope God may bless you with the strength to overcome this. Also, bring up the point of how you go back and do it to your confessor, he will be a much better adviser than me or probably anyone else.
I watched porn everyday for almost 10 years, and now I have not watched it or masturbated for OVER A YEAR! I am living proof of what God can do. If He can work through me, He can work through anyone! Again, God Bless!👍
 
EmeraldWings said:
the best means in overcoming sins of the flesh, is prayer, and confession,
and i know by my own experiences, if you do reveal this sin to your confessor, that alone will be a great help in overcoming it, for one because the dread of confessing it again will really make you think twice, and also because by confessing, you will receive the special and necessary graces to overcome this sin,
one devotion that helped me greatly was saying 3 Hail Marys in the morning and at night for the intentions of purity and holiness, although it’s not an instant cure, but when i began that devotion, i noticed myself rapidly overcoming my sins, and i reached a point which i have since not sinned in that way again,

i know it’s humiliating and embarrassing, but your priest is there to help you, he became a priest to tend to wounded souls, and by revealing this to him, he will not be angry or repulsed, he will instead be glad, because then he can begin to work on your soul, he will pray for you and help you overcome this,
also keep in mind, your priest has more then likely heard this sin hundreds, if not thousands of times, and has also heard sins much more shameful, but do you think he is upset at people coming to him with these sins? not at all, it is a great joy when souls come to the confessional dead, but when absolved, they leave new and alive,

perhaps next time you see your priest, ask him if he can help you with a problem, but that you are afraid to say it out loud, because you are very embarrassed at the sin you have been committing, and it is very likely that he will know what you are talking about, or atleast it will not take him long to figure it out,

and other then that, just be patient with yourself, don’t let this cause you to be angry or bitter with yourself, because if you are going to overcome it, you need to do it by a calm and steady repentance, and not by violent passionate displeasure, because you can’t easily pick yourself up again by beating yourself down,
of course we should be sorry for our sins, but to get angry with ourselves over our sins is also a hidden pride, because it is not regarding ourselves as the weak creatures we truly are,

the best protection against these sins, and every other sin, is by praying for help at the moment of temptation, or even before being tempted, meaning throughout the day to ask for protection from falling into temptation,

well…that’s all for now, i hope this helps you, if you have any other questions please ask,
ok take care and i will be praying for you.
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Great Advice… God Bless you…
 
WAC said:
I am currently 15 right now, and I have been committing this terrible sin for two years. I go to Reconciliation every week, but I cannot get over the weekness of the flesh. And, I am too embarrassed to tell my father or my spiritual advisor about my addiction. I also know that it is an interference with my calling to the priesthood. I don’t know what to do. I would appreciate your help. Thanks.
Click to expand...
Hi there,
I have been in your shoes. I know oh too well everything you’re feeling. I have been doing it for 7 years. I gave up this sin for Lent, and Thank the Lord, I’ve been clean since then. I really think God wants me to help as many people as I can break this habit.
First thing, is take it day by day. If you try to cut this out right now, it’ll crush you. You’re not that strong. Ask God every day for the graces to be pure. Say “Lord, thank you for allowing me to be pure today. Please help me do it again tomorrow.” Focus on keeping clean every day. Then days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years…
Also, it would help if you had something to hold. I had a rock, another person I helped had a rosary. Just something that you can hold on tight to during temptation. It really helps.
Next, surround yourself with holy images. If you masturbate to porn, turn off that junk. Throw away the magazines. Find out how to block it on your computer. Instead of that, watch movies about the lives of saints or something on EWTN. Read the Bible instead of looking at dirty magazines. I was most tempted after school on rough days. I put Holy Cards on my ceiling fan above my bed, so I can have Jesus and other saints looking down at me at all times.
My dear, the most important thing that you need to do is change your mindset. If you think negitave thoughts, like that you are going to go to hell if you do it, that won’t work. Turn it around. Think about gaining the virtues of purity.

Please send me a PM if you need to talk to someone. It would make me happy to help you.

-Jeanne
 
Could I please ask for everyone’s prayers?

I have been addicted to this sin since I was in high school. I haven’t really started dealing with it since I became Catholic.

I have recently fallen hard and feel like I can’t recover my faith. I have constant images in my head, and I can’t stop myself. I’ve been praying the rosary, going to Mass, and trying to rely on God’s strength.

Thank you.
 
Topaz1128 said:
Could I please ask for everyone’s prayers?

I have been addicted to this sin since I was in high school. I haven’t really started dealing with it since I became Catholic.

I have recently fallen hard and feel like I can’t recover my faith. I have constant images in my head, and I can’t stop myself. I’ve been praying the rosary, going to Mass, and trying to rely on God’s strength.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
yes definitely, but i do have 3 pieces of advice - first of all, do you go to confession regularly? that was my saving grace, and i definitely would have never overcome this sin without it,
and like i tell so many others, take up the devotion of saying 3 Hail Mary’s in the morning and at night for purity and holiness.

and then one more thing that will help you, is holy oil,
just bless yourself with holy oil every day(or even more) by making a cross on your forehead with it and say something like “by this holy oil and by Thy Precious Blood O Lord, wash away all unclean thoughts and desires from my heart, mind, and memory”

and by that you can actually forget those thoughts and images in your mind,
it’s something my priest told me about, and it has worked for me, although not instantly, but just gradually.

ok well i will be praying for you, and i am sure you can overcome this, just remember to always seek Gods help throughout the day and especially during times of temptation.
 
EmeraldWings said:
yes definitely, but i do have 3 pieces of advice - first of all, do you go to confession regularly? that was my saving grace, and i definitely would have never overcome this sin without it,
and like i tell so many others, take up the devotion of saying 3 Hail Mary’s in the morning and at night for purity and holiness.

and then one more thing that will help you, is holy oil,
just bless yourself with holy oil every day(or even more) by making a cross on your forehead with it and say something like “by this holy oil and by Thy Precious Blood O Lord, wash away all unclean thoughts and desires from my heart, mind, and memory”

and by that you can actually forget those thoughts and images in your mind,
it’s something my priest told me about, and it has worked for me, although not instantly, but just gradually.

ok well i will be praying for you, and i am sure you can overcome this, just remember to always seek Gods help throughout the day and especially during times of temptation.
Click to expand...
Thank you so much for your advice!

My parish offers confession for only one hour on Saturday afternoons, so it is hard for me to go regularly. My last confession was about two weeks ago.

How do I get holy oil? Would my parish offer me a vial of it? I like that idea.
 
OAO said:
Some facts you might want to know:

I have spoken to two doctors about this subject. This is what they have told me:

(a) In some men, prolonged abstinence can lead to pain throughout the day due to pressure on the prostate. If you have frequent nocturnal emissions, that helps, but if not, good luck; I abstained for 3 weeks and felt like I had a mild of case of “blue balls” for days.
(b) Don’t expect it to get easier with time - that is, until you’re of, say, middle age and your testosterone decreases.
(c) Some men, however, never experience any pain with abstinence. Some end up in pretty bad straights - blood in their emissions, for example. It just depends on where you fall on the spectrum.

So, it’s simply untrue when people say that masturbation is just an addiction like nicotine or caffeine. There are some sex addicts, but more likely than not, you aren’t one.

– OAO
Click to expand...
First, have you read the thread, How to stop masturbating and overcome the sin of lust on this forum? forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=373387 Currently 38 pages of advice.

Second, if one researches, and asks more than two doctors, there are some reported negative side effects to sexual abstinence. There are more reported physical benefits. Many people conclude that based solely upon physical effects, abstinence is a healthier lifestyle.

Third - You are going to be a priest. That rocks! We need more priests. I am very happy for you. I don’t think that this particular sin will interfere with your plans. No one, priests included, is perfect. I am sure that many priests share your struggle.
 
Topaz1128 said:
Could I please ask for everyone’s prayers?

I have been addicted to this sin since I was in high school. I haven’t really started dealing with it since I became Catholic.

I have recently fallen hard and feel like I can’t recover my faith. I have constant images in my head, and I can’t stop myself. I’ve been praying the rosary, going to Mass, and trying to rely on God’s strength.

Thank you.
Click to expand...
Lord Jesus,You said,
“I have come to set the captives free.”
We are captive and need Your healing touch.
Free us, Lord, from our addictions,
so that we will be:
…free from the cares and worries that stifle our happiness;
…free from sins that cling to us, and to which we cling;
…free from all compulsive behavior
that prevents us from becoming what You, Lord,
have planned for us.
Bring us, loving Savior,
to the experience of abundantlife
which You promised.

Amen.
 
MtnDwellar said:
First, have you read the thread, How to stop masturbating and overcome the sin of lust on this forum? forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=373387 Currently 38 pages of advice.
Click to expand...
Yes, I’ve posted numerous times in it.
Second, if one researches, and asks more than two doctors, there are some reported negative side effects to sexual abstinence. There are more reported physical benefits. Many people conclude that based solely upon physical effects, abstinence is a healthier lifestyle.
Click to expand...
Any credible source? I seriously doubt it.

It’s called prostatic congestion, folks.

I cannot sit idly by when others consign teenagers to lives of pain.
Third - You are going to be a priest. That rocks! We need more priests. I am very happy for you. I don’t think that this particular sin will interfere with your plans. No one, priests included, is perfect. I am sure that many priests share your struggle.
Click to expand...
Where did you get that idea? I’ve thought about being a priest, but who knows. And yes, according to some surveys 95% of priests masturbate: richardsipe.com/Books_of_Note/priesthood_in_Spain.htm
 
As a 16 year old practicing Catholic, I feel your pain my brother in Christ. At times it does as if God doesn’t care.But **HE DOES **care for you. Don’t fret, don’t become discouraged, for I assure you Jesus will NEVER, EVER, EVER EVER EVER leave you alone in darkness. He created you in the Godhead, he is your Eucharistic Lord and father, and as such he will nourish you and feed you with his body and blood. hang in there. I will say a hail Mary for you:thumbsup:

I hope this video will cheer you and everybody here up. It sure has brought tears to my eyes.
youtube.com/watch?v=9Q5T9RYLiG4
 
I will pray for you, and the retreat I went on this weekend was very relaxing. Mass was in Latin and English both. They had the communion rail still and I received the Host on my tongue.
 
Hello there,I’d like to add that overcoming this sin,its good to pray the rosary.It really works.Our Mother Mary will help us with our struggles by interceding and praying for us.Pray the rosary.God bless you.🙂
 
OAO said:
Where did you get that idea? I’ve thought about being a priest, but who knows.
Click to expand...
Although I quoted your statements, my comments were directed to the OP, who is planning on priesthood.
 
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