Help with what is"grave" matter?

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AnneTeresa

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I can’t figure out what grave matter is by what the catechism says…

1858 Grave matter is specified by the Ten Commandments, corresponding to the answer of Jesus to the rich young man: "Do not kill, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and your mother."132 The gravity of sins is more or less great: murder is graver than theft. One must also take into account who is wronged: violence against parents is in itself graver than violence against a stranger.

The thing that confuses me is that the commandment might say “do not kill” or “do not commit adultery” but there are lots of other sins that fall in each category that aren’t really killing or adultery. For example, “do not kill,” does that mean that getting really angry and wanting revenge is included and is therefore mortal (if the other conditions are met)?

Likewise for “do not commit adultery,” does that mean that if you sin sexually with yourself or with pornography that it is mortal (if the other conditions are met? Same for all the commandments.

If we go by the Sermon on the Mount and how the new law makes the commandments even harder to follow than the old law (i.e., thinking lustful thoughts is adultery according to Jesus), does that mean then that thinking lustful thoughts is a mortal sin if the other conditions are met? Same for sins under all the other commandments. Why this matters is that I sometimes need to know if I am in a state of mortal sin or if it’s ok to receive the Eucharist.

I would really appreciate any help in understanding this!
 
AnneTeresa said:
I can’t figure out what grave matter is by what the catechism says…

1858 Grave matter is specified by the Ten Commandments, corresponding to the answer of Jesus to the rich young man: "Do not kill, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and your mother."132 The gravity of sins is more or less great: murder is graver than theft. One must also take into account who is wronged: violence against parents is in itself graver than violence against a stranger.

The thing that confuses me is that the commandment might say “do not kill” or “do not commit adultery” but there are lots of other sins that fall in each category that aren’t really killing or adultery. For example, “do not kill,” does that mean that getting really angry and wanting revenge is included and is therefore mortal (if the other conditions are met)?

Likewise for “do not commit adultery,” does that mean that if you sin sexually with yourself or with pornography that it is mortal (if the other conditions are met? Same for all the commandments.

If we go by the Sermon on the Mount and how the new law makes the commandments even harder to follow than the old law (i.e., thinking lustful thoughts is adultery according to Jesus), does that mean then that thinking lustful thoughts is a mortal sin if the other conditions are met? Same for sins under all the other commandments. Why this matters is that I sometimes need to know if I am in a state of mortal sin or if it’s ok to receive the Eucharist.

I would really appreciate any help in understanding this!
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Your conscience will help you know what is really hurtful to someone, and to what degree. You can steal a dollar from a rich man and it’s a venial sin. Steal a dollar from someone who has only that dollar for that day’s sustenance, and it’s likely a mortal sin. Punch a companion in an argument and it’s likely a venial sin, unless great harm results. Punch a parent, and it’s likely a mortal sin. It’s the degree and the circumstances that make the sin mortal or venial. Whether it’s a child or adult committing the sin makes a difference, also. An adult should have acquired the knowledge to know when he/she is doing something somewhat harmful, or gravely harmful. If you feel that what you’ve done is grave, then don’t receive Communion until you’ve been to confession. If you have serious doubts, then I’d receive Communion. To be mortal a sin must be grave, you must have full knowledge of the gravity, and fully consent to do it anyway.
 
AnneTeresa said:
I can’t figure out what grave matter is by what the catechism says…

1858 Grave matter is specified by the Ten Commandments, corresponding to the answer of Jesus to the rich young man: "Do not kill, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and your mother."132 The gravity of sins is more or less great: murder is graver than theft. One must also take into account who is wronged: violence against parents is in itself graver than violence against a stranger.

The thing that confuses me is that the commandment might say “do not kill” or “do not commit adultery” but there are lots of other sins that fall in each category that aren’t really killing or adultery.
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Yeah, you’re right, the Catechism means that all instances of “grave matter” can fit into each of the Ten Commandments as an umbrella term.

So to take the sixth commandment for example, adultery is obviously covered, but on most examinations of conscience, fornication, homosexual acts, masturbation, and contraception are listed as “grave matter” under the sixth commandment as well.

So yes, my understand is that in this context the phrases that make up the Ten Commandments are umbrella terms.
AnneTeresa said:
For example, “do not kill,” does that mean that getting really angry and wanting revenge is included and is therefore mortal (if the other conditions are met)?
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Feelings/emotions are mostly uncontrollable and are not sins. Anger and the desire for revenge are only sins if those feelings are actualized by your will.

So say someone cuts you off in traffic, and you get really pissed. But if you willingly and willfully let yourself wish that something bad happens to that person, then it’s sinful. Not before.

Same goes with the sexual stuff, I think. Feelings are never sins; impure or lustful thoughts occur when one allows one’s *will *to enjoy imagined impurity.

But I realize this is a grey area. It’s obvious if you’ve stolen something, or committed fornication, or whatever. It’s not so obvious if you’ve crossed the line in your own heart.

It’s nothing to freak out about, though. 🙂 Err on the side of caution, and talk to a priest if you’re uncertain. Obviously if you’re worried about a specific thought you had, you can kill two birds with one stone by going to confession: the priest can advise you on whether you sinned, and if you have, you can receive absolution.
AnneTeresa said:
Same for sins under all the other commandments. Why this matters is that I sometimes need to know if I am in a state of mortal sin or if it’s ok to receive the Eucharist.
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A priest once reminded me very helpfully that doubt provides freedom. This priest - a hardcore, orthodox one serving at a spiritually passionate and vibrant parish in my home city - told me in no uncertain terms that as long as one is making one’s best effort to follow the Lord (praying, seeking humility and virtue, etc.), then you should receive the Eucharist as Mass unless you’re reasonably certain that you’ve committed a grave sin.

That was his advice: If you’re in doubt either way, receive.
 
This is a really good question, and I’m not sure how much light I can shed.

There are sins that are clearly grave - adultery, fornication, rape, murder, sexual abuse, stealing, blasphemy.

There are sins that are clearly venial - swearing at the jerk who cut you off in traffic, telling lewd jokes, letting your anger hold you longer than it should.

Then there are those that are debated regularly. Masturbation is considered grave matter, although some have offered mitigating circumstances - for example, married men who are on business trips for long periods of time, or whose wives are pregnant or unable to make love. Those for whom there is a compelling force of habit - note that the actions that gained one this force of habit would be considered grave, so after confession if one falls into temptation in the process of trying to end the force of habit, it’s considered a lesser sin. I think every argument I’ve heard on force of habit, though, says that pornography is always considered grave matter.

What about sexual thoughts? Jesus says that lust begins in the heart and to even look at another lustfully is to commit adultery. What does looking lustfully mean? If I look at a coworker and undress her with my eyes, that’s certainly grave matter. If I look at her and think “How pretty she is” and leave it at that, does that even venture into sin?

I know this sheds zero light on the matter, but maybe it helps get some thoughts going.
 
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