Saints such as the staretz Basil of Poiana Marului, Ignatius Brianchaninov, and Theophan the Recluse would disagree with you here. They all say that, while having a spiritual father is the ideal, the journey can and should be undertaken even in the absence of a spiritual father (or mother). St. Basil says the writings of the Fathers act as our guide, and that they warn us of the dangers of delusion not to discourage us from engaging in noetic work, but so that we can recognize delusion when it is upon us.
Met. Kallistos Ware also says that we spiritual guidance comes from more sources than just the spiritual father/mother. Often one meeting with a spiritual elder is enough to set a person on the path to holiness for life. Having friends of a similar spiritual mindset, he says, is also a great help and guide. In the absence of all of this, Met. Kallistos again repeats what the above mentioned Fathers said; i.e. that the writings of the Fathers themselves suffice as our guide in the absence of a personal spiritual guide.
The key in all of this is humility, as St. Basil points out. We ought not to expect to attain the level of holiness that a St. Seraphim of Sarov attained. Nonetheless, we should not let this discourage us from attempting and from really engaging in noetic work. Whether or not we have the luxury of a spiritual father/mother, we are all called to the heights of holiness because we are all called to life in the Trinity. God Himself has given us this calling. We must trust that He, as Father, would also provide us with the means to live up to this calling.
For what it’s worth, I feel very blessed and humbled that I’ve had some excellent spiritual guides, as well as some amazing spiritual friends throughout my short lifetime. I realize, however, that not everyone has that luxury.
May God have mercy on us.
