Holding Hands during Our Father?

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Personally I think it’s tacky :mad:

I know it is not prescribed anywhere :hmmm: On a spiritual note, I think you could run the risk of making a circle and leave someone out, maybe making them feel as an outsider 😦 Ergo… Best not to hold hands.
 
I don’t like it at all. I bow my head and hold my own hands so no one will make a grab for them! Also, I do not like the way the laity out stretch their arms like the priest.
 
The Congregation for the liturgy has already expressed its teaching on the matter. "…The prolonged holding of hands is of itself a sign of communion rather than of peace. Further, it is a liturgical gesture introduced spontaneously but on personal initiative; it is not in the rubrics. Nor is there any clear explanation of why the sign of peace at the invitation: “Let us offer each other the sign of peace” should be supplanted in order to bring a different gesture with less meaning into another part of the Mass: the sign of peace is filled with meaning, graciousness, and Christian inspiration. Any substitution for it must be repudiated: Notitiae 11 (1975) 226

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I don’t care for it, and I don’t like folks holding their hands up like the priest does. However, I would never tell somebody they couldn’t do it; that’s their business.

Hopefully, it’s just a passing fad.
 
The people in my small parish hold hands during the Lord’s Prayer at Mass. They’ve been doing this since I joined the parish 22 years ago. It’s so much a part of them, it would be almost insulting not to hold a person’s hand, who reached out to you.

The Bishop nor the pastor have said this should not be done, so, who am I or anyone else to tell them to stop?

Jim
 
In answer to the OP, it’s not okay with me.
And I do not do it.
 
catsrus said:
In answer to the OP, it’s not okay with me.
And I do not do it.
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It’s a lot better than everyone clapping for the choir at the end of Mass.:clapping: Where does the craziness end? I hold hands with my wife and/or children during the Lord’s Prayer. Liturgically speaking I don’t feel that God is frowning on me for doing so. There are a lot bigger fish to fry…

Oh, and with proper catechesis one would know that Holy Communion is the ultimate sign of unity not holding hands. It’s sad that because this isn’t common knowledge we have to make holding hands liturgically incorrect. Maybe instead of concentrating on why we shouldn’t be holding hands we should be emphasizing the power of the Eucharist. Over fifty percent of those sitting next to you at Mass do not believe in the Real Presence. Let’s really worry about that! This is the biggest fish to fry…:yup:
 
It has been going on since the mid 1960’s. There is no statement either for or against it in the most recent revision of the GIRM (General Instructions of the Roman Missal), nor was there in the prior revision in the 1970’s.

As a point, many people bring up the proposition that since it is not permitted in the GIRM, it is not allowed; by that logic, neither is holding your hands together fingers interlaced, nor palms together fingers pointing up or out, as neither of those positions are mentioned in the GIRM either.

Archbishop Chaput, of Colorado, hardly what one would call a blazing liberal, said that it is simply not covered by the rules; neither allowed nor prohibited, and as such, those who wish to should be allowed to do so in peace, and those who choose not to should be allowed to not do so, in peace.

It would seem that the rule of Charity should apply, and that is an issue that cuts both ways. If someone standing next to you during the Our Father reaches out to hold hands, it would seem the charitible thing to do to hold their hand and not make a major issue of it. The reverse is also true; if someone does not make a move to hold hands during the Our Father, it would appear that the charitible thing to do would be to allow them theri space and not reach out.

It never ceases to amaze me that people who do not like this refer to others in their parish as strangers. Given that they are fellow members of the parish, members of the Body of Christ, and fellow Catholics I find this attitude to be one of the stranger ones I have heard. That some don’t like to hold hands I can understand; the vehemence that this causes does leave me to wonder what they would do if they suddenly realized that it was Christ Himself standing next to them…
 
I just posted this on another thread, but I’ll do it again here:

I have never liked the holding hands thing, but I used to grit my teeth and go along with it until the day when the lady holding my right hand criticised the way I was doing it. Apparently my hand was under hers when it was supposed to be over or something like that. At that point I thought to myself ‘I’ve had it with this’ and I folded my hands together on my chest for the Our Father. I’ve done it this way ever since that day.
 
teachccd said:
Over fifty percent of those sitting next to you at Mass do not believe in the Real Presence. Let’s really worry about that! This is the biggest fish to fry…:yup:/QUOTEWith all due respect, the polls that have been taken have been dissected, and what they show is not so much that people do not believe in the Real Presence, but rather that they were not well catechized on what the Church teaches about the Real Presence. There is a significant difference between the two positions, as one is a position of ignorance and the other appears or at least implies a denial of the Real Presence. I don’t think there are very many in the pews (perhaps with an exception of the CE’s) who believe that Christ is not present in the Eucharist; many of them don’t understand how and couldn’t pick out the word “transubstantiation” from a list of similar words, let alone tell you what it means.

I agree whole-heartedly that we need to do a much better job of catechizing. And I also agree there are bigger fish to fry.
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Maybe somebody could explain about the Our Father prayer during the mass means, then we would see if it is appropriate to hold hands or not.

Is the Our Father during the mass between you personally and God?

or

is it between you and the persons next to you and God?
 
water said:
Maybe somebody could explain about the Our Father prayer during the mass means, then we would see if it is appropriate to hold hands or not.

Is the Our Father during the mass between you personally and God?

or

is it between you and the persons next to you and God?
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I think that most who support holding hands see it as a communal prayer to Our Father. It is filled with “our” and “us” and is the one communal prayer of the Mass offered by the people rather than by the priest.

As otjm notes, Archbishop Chaput promulgated a well-written pastoral letter on the subject, with charity toward each other as the ultimate concern.

There are a couple bishops who strongly discourage it, and I believe one in Ohio who has mandated the “orans” position for his diocese. It is good to check to see if your bishop has taken a position, though there is question as to whether an individual bishop is allowed to prescribe or proscribe a position since that authority seems to be given only to the Conference of Bishops.

There are many legitimate reasons that people have for not wanting to participate, and they should have to offer no excuse or be subject to any criticism for that decision. Nor however should those who do want to hold hands be looked at as anything less than showing their own devotion. It is strictly a personal preference of which way one offers their praise to God at that time. That being said though, it is a matter of personal initiative, and not to be “led” or made a standard by some third party, including priests or liturgical directors.

Peace,
 
I’m in a different parish now and they don’t and I’m glad:)
But in the other no one even sat close enough to each other to even hold in fact they each one had their own pew. Dessert
 
Just before the Our Father make a mighty sneeze into the palms of your hands. Then take out a big blue or red hanky and wipe your palms. It works!
 
WenckebachCath said:
Wow, lots of negativity on this thread!
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Nah, that’s nothing. Past threads on this subject have been significantly worse. In fact, for this subject the conversation has been, for the most part, charitable.

I really liked your post, otjm (#11). I personally prefer to not hold hands during the Our Father, but will accomidate it on certain occasions.

More broadly, I have found that over the past few years I learned much more about the mass and the appropriate gestures (from the GIRM, in particular), and along with ALL the good, it has had a minor negative effect on me. In knowing more, I have to be careful not to let my mind/eyes wander and take in what others may or may not be doing. Being human, I can get distracted in observing what my fellow parishoners are doing and even judging their “gestures” or lack thereof. Outside of mass, if the subject comes up, I won’t pass up an opportunity to enlighten a fellow parisoner about the mass, rubrics, gestures, etc. I just have to be careful about judging their actions during mass and getting distracted from the real reason I/we are there.
 
water said:
Maybe somebody could explain about the Our Father prayer during the mass means, then we would see if it is appropriate to hold hands or not.

Is the Our Father during the mass between you personally and God?

or

is it between you and the persons next to you and God?
Click to expand...
The first two words of the prayer answer your question, “Our Father,” not “My Father.”

Jim
 
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