Holding in anger/sadness?

[mr.p]

We aren’t supposed to get angry but if I don’t then I just hold it in until I feel like I have a million rusty needles concerned in lemon juice in my stomach constantly

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

You need to learn to express your feelings in ways that don’t hurt you or anybody else.
Mr Rogers taught me that and I’m sticking to it.
Peace

 

[Lou2U]

I think you should speak to a Priest about this. Whatever you think about being angry, there’s certainly nothing good with bottling it up like you are doing. Maybe talking to a therapist could help you work out a healthy outlet for your emotions.

 

[mr.p]

But whatever I try to express my emotions people tell me to man up. But I’m only 16 yet I feel like anger and stress has taken a toll on my health

 

[Lee1]

You can use the same opportunity which provokes anger to learn humility.
And if you can that is a far more useful spiritual grace than to be able to exhibit anger. Maybe ask yourself, how can I turn this around to,be of value to me? What can I learn from this situation?

If all else fails I’d suggest a punch bag, knock yourself out as they say and when you’re too tired to hit it anymore…well chances are you’ll be over your anger. I got this from Roy Rogers

 

[Lou2U]

That phrase is wrong and so are the people telling you not to express your feelings. Could you talk to a school therapist, if you have one? Or your Priest?

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

Maybe it has to do with how you’re expressomg your emotions.

I’m not there, so I don’t know, but there is a vast distance between stuffing your emotions and total meltdown.

In general, to calmly say “I felt sad/angry when such and such happened” is perfectly acceptable.

 

[Lee1]

What kind of situation are we talking about, bullying?
Because you know you should see someone in authority about that.

 

[Dan_Defender]

You can use the same opportunity which provokes anger to learn humility.

This is true. ‘The humble live in continuous peace, while in the hearts of the proud are envy and frequent anger.’ - The Imitation of Christ

 

[Lee1]

That is a great book.

 

[GospelOfMatthew]

I confess being angry pretty much every time I go to confession and the Priest always says it’s not a sin to be angry, what we do with our anger is a sin.

I’m 20YO in college and I’m angry/sad a decent amount when I see a guys having lots of female friends and talking to lots of women and I’m a nice and actively religious guy (how humble of me lol) and there seems to be like no women that talk to me/I talk with. Those that I do have boyfriends and express no interest in talking to me besides like “hey” and “cya later.”

Gets me a bit angry and sad. I think it is a sin though because I’m getting angry about not talking to women when there are some people out in the world begging on the side of the road, clearly they have more reason to be angry than me. Jesus died on the cross after being spat on, He has every right to be angry but isn’t.

I don’t let my sadness or anger show though, only privately do I show these emotions. It’s a side-effect/damage of using pornographic images and masturbation since I was 12YO. So I’m working on it

 

[guanophore]

We aren’t supposed to get angry

Where on earth did you ever get this idea?

if I don’t then I just hold it in until I feel like I have a million rusty needles concerned in lemon juice in my stomach constantly

I think you are confusing the feeling of anger with angry behavior?

I think you are saying if you don’t express your anger (however you usually do that) and try to hold it in your body then you start feeling symptoms. This is normal.

I think you should speak to a Priest about this.

It is probably not so much a spiritual problem as it is a skills problem. Some people have just never learned healthy anger expression. Some of those people are priests!

But whatever I try to express my emotions people tell me to man up.

I am not sure what this means on both parts. It is not clear how you are letting your anger out, and I am not sure what it means to “man up”? Would that be along the lines of “suck it up”? Or don’t be angry it isn’t manly? Is it a reaction to a childish temper tantrum?

I’m only 16 yet I feel like anger and stress has taken a toll on my health

This can happen at any age.

 

[JaredOConnor]

On the same boat as you brother. I started pornography when I was 11 and I’m now 20 like you. It’s easiest to take it one day as a time then thinking about stopping it permanently.

 

[poche]

It is not that we are not supposed to get angry, it is how we respond to the situations that make us angry. There is what I can control. There is what I can’t control. If you can put up with this mortification of being uncomfortable in difficult situations then you could grow in greater holiness than someone else who fasted on bread and water for 100 years.

 

[Eric_Hyom]

We aren’t supposed to get angry but if I don’t then I just hold it in until I feel like I have a million rusty needles concerned in lemon juice in my stomach constantly

It is said that anger is like picking up a burning coal, with the intention of throwing it at the person who angers you; but the person who gets burnt the most is you. The longer you hold onto this burning coal of anger, the hotter it becomes.

Your anger will probably harm you more than it will harm the person you are angry with. The person who angers you, controls you, it is like they have a remote control; they just push your buttons and you suffer. They probably do not even know that they are still harming you.

You are giving them permission to carry on harming you, but it is within your power to take this permission away from them. You should be the only person to control what goes on in your head. Let go, forgive them, pray that God will bless them.

The power to forgive will heal you, more than it will heal the person who angers you.

Blessings
Eric

 

[crenfro]

Hello.

Is there a counselor at school you can talk to? Do you play sports? The martial arts are great for anger release.

Just my two cents, please take or leave. Placing you in the enclosed garden of the most sacred heart of the Blessed Virgin Mary.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

I think the man up ideology is awful. I wish society had a better attitude to male emotion. It’s like we expect men to somehow keep a lid on it all but then we complain about the unhealthy coping mechanisms many will inevitably develop.

Try to ignore those who tell you to man up. Also you are 16 of course you are emotional! It’s normal.

I agree you need to find healthy outlets and I wish you had more support in doing so.