"Holier than thou?"

[Flavius_Aetius]

Hello; I’d like to ask what your opinion is on what is being “Holier than thou” when defending/speaking of the Catholic faith. I recently had a arguement with my completely anti-catholic step grandmother, step-father and after a while into the conversation I was told that because I try to actually follow God’s laws over societies abortion accepting laws I was being “Holier than thou.”

It hurt to hear that apparently I saw the rest of the world with this religious elitist sense according to them. So in conclusion am I right in my faith to trust in God’s laws over societies despite the fact that I’m asking that even people who aren’t Catholic or Christian accept them. (mainly on stances like abortion where it would be illegalized, and wanting contreceptives banned.)

 

[Belgarion]

I’ve been called that many times.

It is ridiculous. ITs just a phrase that those kind of people call more religious people because it makes them feel better about themselves.

I am blunt sometimes when it comes to religion and arguing with non-Catholics. Those people see that bluntness as me lording my “holiness” over them.

Right.

Again, its just something they say because they feel inadequate.

 

[1ke]

Hello; I’d like to ask what your opinion is on what is being “Holier than thou” when defending/speaking of the Catholic faith. I recently had a arguement with my completely anti-catholic step grandmother, step-father and after a while into the conversation I was told that because I try to actually follow God’s laws over societies abortion accepting laws I was being “Holier than thou.”

It hurt to hear that apparently I saw the rest of the world with this religious elitist sense according to them. So in conclusion am I right in my faith to trust in God’s laws over societies despite the fact that I’m asking that even people who aren’t Catholic or Christian accept them. (mainly on stances like abortion where it would be illegalized, and wanting contreceptives banned.)

Of course we are called to follow God’s law no matter what.

That is not being “holier than thou”. That is being faithful.

“holier than thou” has a connotation of being a hypocrite or being like the Pharissees of the bible. And, usually people throw out absurd arguments like this when you strike a nerve and prick their conscience. They know deep down that abortion is wrong. So, instead of debating facts and using reason and logic they can only resort to name calling. They know it’s wrong. They can’t defend it. So, they attack you.

Don’t let it bother you. You are doing the right thing.

 

[Rob_s_Wife]

Notice they didn’t say you were actually wrong, just that they didn’t like the way you made them feel about their being wrong- because if they think you are being holier than thou - they are acknowledging that they feel like they are lacking in holiness in comparison.

---

basicly they can’t argue the point, know it, and it makes them annoyed with you for pointing it out.

I do not consider that to be holier than thou or like being a pharisee

Also, one should note that some people are actually holier than others. And it’s not neccessarily a bad thing.

For example, I’d like to think I’m holier than my wiccan sister or my married brother who has a series a hussies on the side.

Most good christians seek those they feel are holier than themselves. (ALL the saints did this for example.)

It’s usually those who don’t like to have their sins exposed that pull the holier than thou card.

If you have been discussing something as a must for christians that is not, THAT might be a negative holier than thou liek a pharasee. Abortion is not such a thing.

 

[Em_in_FL]

While I agree with you 100% on leading others to follow the teachings of the church (that’s a good thing! ), sometimes the way things are phrased can hurt or help your cause… and sometimes no matter HOW you phrase it it’s a lost cause…
So, whenever you’re discussing matters of the faith and the church’s teachings, say it in a positive, loving manner… so as not to incite an argumentative response. Sometimes HOW your phrase your discussions can make or break a change of heart in the listener!

 

[joandarc2008]

I agree with the last thread - while it is our duty to teach the ways of the Lord especially the ways of Christ we must remember that one of the most important laws that Christ taught us was the one of love and tolerance. Meaning to me that while it is my duty and calling to teach those in my household and those I am responsible for as well as those who ask for my opinion I must do my best to temper that with love at all times. Some people make that more difficult than others. I must also remember that I am an imperfect human being and by the very nature of that definition cannot live up to all of God’s laws on any given day. That is why we have the gift of the sacrament of reconcilitation. It is those that are quick to point out constantly what YOU do wrong and how pious THEY are that are usually dubbed with the “Holier than Thou.” When I hear that phrase I have to ask myself some simple questions:

1. Am I living up to what I am teaching? (especially publically)
2. If I am not living up to what I am teaching have I been to reconcilliation and am I in the process of making amends for that behavior?
3. Am I giving my message in a way that is loving and tolerant?
4. At the end of the day for the sake of peace can I agree that God gave us all the gift of free will and at times I need to agree to disagree and still love and pray for someone.

God Bless,

Joan