Holy Thursday and Good Friday: what can I expect?

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Because I’m a medical shut-in, my RCIA in college didn’t include much in the way of “How to Catholic” or common prayers. A little over a year ago, I secured regular transportation to Mass from my non-Catholic family, though I only attend on Sundays and days of obligation so as not to trouble them. I told them I’d very much like to attend Holy Thursday or Good Friday services. Mom was receptive to the idea. The Tridiuum is a bit much to ask of her, so which would you guys recommend for a Catholic who knows doctrine but is sometimes lost liturgically? And what are the services like on those days? (NO Mass, nothing too fancy)
 
Holy Thursday: Feet washing, procession of the Eucharist, adoration.
Good Friday: Adoration of the cross (people go up and kiss it). Distribution of communion. Not a Mass since the Eucharist is not confected.

Technically, the entire Triduum is one whole Mass!
 
Both have a tendency to run long, depending on the way in which the parish does things. Ours last about 90 minutes or so each.
 
Did Good Friday liturgy take longer , back in the day?

I remember attending with my grandmother about 1964 or 1965, it felt like it was about 3 hours at least. Of course I was just a kid, so thing did seem to take longer
 
You are considering time commitment, right? Following is my best estimate by memory.

Holy Thursday:
20 minutes - feet washing
1 hour - length of a regular mass
20 minutes - adoration & procession
Optional: prayer afterwards, with Blessed Sacrament, usually available until midnight

Good Friday:
40 minutes - entrance rites and veneration of the Cross
20 minutes - communion (no mass this day)

If you must choose one, I recommend Good Friday. If you are in the same position next year to only experience one, go to Holy Thursday next year.
 
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The Tridiuum is a bit much to ask of her,
Is there someone in the RCIA program who is already planning to attend that can transport you? It is a shame to miss it!
so which would you guys recommend for a Catholic who knows doctrine but is sometimes lost liturgically?
These are two separate issues. You can study and learn about Triduum, but nothing can replace being there!

It is the high point of the liturgical year, and packed with so much enacted ritual and doctrine. I think to begin, it is important not to try to grasp it all, but allow the Holy Spirit to draw you in to the experience of it. Fortunately, you can always learn and experience more of it every year.

I will give you a link to one of my favorite preachers on the topic:

 
Did Good Friday liturgy take longer , back in the day?

I remember attending with my grandmother about 1964 or 1965, it felt like it was about 3 hours at least. Of course I was just a kid, so thing did seem to take longer
I think it must have been because you were very young that it felt that way. I don’t remember Good Friday service being that long.

It’s my first memory of being at church. When the priest prostrated himself I asked my dad if he was looking for mice. This would have been 1957 or '58 when everything was still in Latin.
 
Just to clarify, I’m a confirmed Catholic. I converted in college but it’s only been in the last year and a half that I’ve been able to attend reliably. I’ve decided to try for more than the minimum, Mom, said yes, and now we’re trying to figure out a schedule and I’m also a bit nervous because I’ve never been.
 
And the trend is to have one liturgy for the entire parish for the Triduum, that will more and more mean bilingual which adds 25 - 50% more time to the service.

The three-day-liturgy is very quiet and reverent until that Alleluia at the Vigil. I get choked up just thinking about it.
 
I’m also a bit nervous because I’ve never been.
OIC well, not to worry, you are in for a treat! Go early to get a good seat, and just absorb like a sponge! You may not understand or see all the detail, but try to get a spot where you can be near the altar. The front seats will be reserved for the catechumens, but you can sit behind them.
 
It’s not uncommon for parishes to print special programs or at least supplements to hymnals, etc. Even for those who always go, these are once a year liturgies and it’s easy to forget what changes. And visitors are more common, too, including non-Catholics. So don’t worry about sticking out or seeming conspicuous. 🙂
 
In this part of the US, Parishes have booklets called “Missalettes” for Masses. They are in the pew or on a rack in the back.
 
Minor update: the parish is doing the Veneration of the Cross a few hours after the Good Friday service, so that’d be another option.
 
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