Homebound qualifications?

[WhiteDove359]

I want to become an extrodinary minister for my parish. I was also wondering what the qualifications are for a person to be considerd the homebound? My grandmother is 75 years old and is in the mid-stages of Lou Gehrig’s Disease. She used to be a practicing Catholic, and she still considers her self Catholic, but the only reason, that I know of on why she does not go to church anymore on sundays is because shes embarresed to be in public, and the illness has affected her to the point where she can almost not even talk anymore. she cans till walk, and barely pick up glasses to drink out of. shes had it for maybe 2 years… she also had a heart-attack sevel years ago, maybe 10, and ever snce then she dose not feel comefortable to be in large crowds, shes clastrophobic. she has not been to church in years.

however, if she does qualify she would probably have tto go to confession first, right? after not being at church for many many years? she grew up in a time of pre- vatican 2. shes kind of superstitous, and when she does go to church she only likes to recieve comunion from the preist and no one else, bcasue thats how they used to do it…i want to try to convine her other wise. all so, she refuses to recieve from a women extroinary minister too… she grew up in malta, during a time when they tought her about if you even walk into a protestant chuch that God would struck you down… so shes old, has some superstitous things, and is pre-vatican 2 catholic. Im really worried abouther, and Im even discerning the preisthood and I want to be a eucharistic / extrodinary minister and give the eucharist to her. shes not going to be around for more then a few years and im worried she’ll go to Hell unless if I can help bring her back to the church in SOME way or whatever. my grandfather was the same, or very simualar way, and he passed about 2 years ago and i worried that he may be in hell, even though he was a great and good person, and he wsas religious in his own way, just like my grandmouther is… but still i worrie. I want to help bring my grandmouther to Christ before she passes, while there is stil time…

so does she qualify as a homebund person? she still gooes out and do things with the fam, but when she does she doesnet speak because she cant have a conversaton with people. she just doesnt feel comefortable going to church in here late years…i cant do everything, but I most certainly want to try…

 

[Moscati]

Perhaps your grandmother might feel comfortable going to an early morning Mass? Or even a daily Mass? Oftentimes those are much less crowded. Perhaps you could offer to go with her–answering for her if need be, letting her hold your arm to walk, etc. I’m so sorry about the ALS (Lou Gehrig’s)–that’s a very tough disease to deal with.

I’m sure she would qualify as homebound, too . . . and if she would accept the Eucharist from you, becoming an EMHC is a wonderful idea.

I don’t think she’s truly sinning by not going to Mass if she can’t physically make it there. Of course, after 10 years, even a grandmother probably needs Confession! I would make an appointment with the priest at your parish, and discuss this with him. He may be able to help.

Was your grandfather in a hospital before he died? If so, a priest may have been made available to him before he died. Even if that didn’t happen, trust your grandfather’s soul to God’s mercy, and pray for him. That’s what we should do for all our loved one’s who die.

 

[prodigalson12]

I already signed on board to be the EMHC for my uncle, yet with severe limitations, he refused to see a priest, refused to attend mass when he could, refused to have a priest visit him for confession so I cannot in my conscience give him communion even though the priest authorized me to do so. I wish I could just play the roll and status of formal priest for 5 minutes to get his sins absolved, for that’s the only thing he’ll handle at present, he cannot even talk now, is bedridden and tomorrow will likely be the last Sunday he has on this earth, so I’ll be there to offer prayer and reading of the scripture, recite the apostles creed, pray a decade of the rosary, yet not at all a mass per say, but at least something to offer in fellowship with him.

You may have to compromize along this manner, but at the very least, get her some supporting documents for her to read how a laymen can be authorized to distribute communion, and if at all possible, at least have the priest visit for confession and to give her the annointing of the sick.

 

[rwoehmke]

I already signed on board to be the EMHC for my uncle, yet with severe limitations, he refused to see a priest, refused to attend mass when he could, refused to have a priest visit him for confession so I cannot in my conscience give him communion even though the priest authorized me to do so.

I would suggest you talk to your priest and ask him to just visit even if the old guy does not want to confess or receive communion. Some older folks are still afraid to have the priest come because that would prove that they are very close to death and they do not want to know that. He just might change his mind if the priest is present. I don’t know if he is still able to communicate in some way one way or the other about being anointed, but if his last wish is still not to be, it would a futile gesture anyway. Anointing is not some form of magic wand that can be used against someone’s wishes.

 

[prodigalson12]

Believe me, I was given the same speech by the priest that gave me the go ahead on giving him the sacrement. He’s in such a dehabilitated state at this time, and his wife not at all with the church is going to help recipicate, she simply doesn’t undrestand, I am operating within the best capacity possible for what both can handle.

The thing is, I love him to death, but see him in this state as being already passed for the most part, and the Lord is giving me strength and kind of a shield not to get overly emotional about it, he knows I have a job to do and that I have to keep some kind of distance here in order to do it, but believe me, I will be venting on this board here soon enough over it, the pain hasn’t been fully realized and won’t until he passes.

The job now, just to get some scripture and prayer in front of him, for he had very little of that most of his past 20 years, that alone is going to make a difference, pushing it past that, as I would like to will be too much, so must remain within the confines of what I can do and even though I really want to do more, I cannot, so much accept things as they are.

 

[Joannm]

We had a woman in our parish who considered herself homebound and asked for an EMHC to bring communion to her instead of going to Mass. But then we discovered that she was going to the club to play bridge, out to lunch with the gals, to dinner and other affairs. It caused a big deal around here as to who is qualified to be considered homebound and who wasn’t. Yes, she had an illness, and since has passed away, but the fact that she had a social life told us that she just didn’t want to come to mass. The priest went to speak to her and tried to convince her to come to Mass but she wouldn’t do it. The EMs still brought her communion but not as often as she requested (several times a week).

 

[WhiteDove359]

you see, thats kind of how i feel about my grandmouther, she still does things. she can leave the house… thats why i hesitate. i would realy love to bring her to mass, but then i here all of the excuses…its hard for her…we got things to do today…i dont feel comefortable… etc…yet she still considers her self a strong catholic and my parents tell me…“biaan your grandmotther knows more about the faith then you do” kind of stuff. and im sittting there thinking… “yea is that why im the only one in whole family who atualy is a practicing catholic the way the church teaches!!!” sigh i really really want to get her to go to mass above everything else…but if she wont do it…i supose i could go to her, read her the verses of the day from the daily missel (yea i bought one even though its going to be out of date soon), ask the priest if i can recored the Homilys, and give her communion. thats all i thinki can do if she wont go to mass… im really sad and scared for her.

 

[prodigalson12]

you see, thats kind of how i feel about my grandmouther, she still does things. she can leave the house… thats why i hesitate. i would realy love to bring her to mass, but then i here all of the excuses…its hard for her…we got things to do today…i dont feel comefortable… etc…yet she still considers her self a strong catholic and my parents tell me…“biaan your grandmotther knows more about the faith then you do” kind of stuff. and im sittting there thinking… “yea is that why im the only one in whole family who atualy is a practicing catholic the way the church teaches!!!” sigh i really really want to get her to go to mass above everything else…but if she wont do it…i supose i could go to her, read her the verses of the day from the daily missel (yea i bought one even though its going to be out of date soon), ask the priest if i can recored the Homilys, and give her communion. thats all i thinki can do if she wont go to mass… im really sad and scared for her.

My Grandmother was the same way, I showed up countless times, ready to take her to church, always one excuse after another, finally I gave up. I would visit her from time to time, read the bible to her, pray a rosary, etc. but never brought her communion knowing full well she was fully capable of showing up to mass and she had a ride there to boot, so no excuses. You should be doing the same, if she want’s to remain protestant “of which she now is”, then give her a protestant service, and this means, no Eucharist.

You also may be alone in regards to attending mass and trying your best to devoutly follow what the church teaches in the company of your relatives, but you are not alone in the world, there are many of us in your same position.

 

[Joe_Kelley]

I think these cases need to be referred to the priest for a decision. As an EMHC it is above my pay grade to decide who can receive when. Which is not to say that I wouldn’t give the priest my view of the facts and opinion when asking for his decision. But it is his job to make the decision.