Homosexual best friend

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Hello. I have a homosexual friend whom I have known for many years. When we met, he was not “out of the closet” yet and him and I were very close. I was the first person he “came out” to and it was very painful for me. I was raised Catholic and so was he. Him and I have sat down many times and I have asked him if he was sure of his choice and he says he can see it no other way. Ever since a child he has felt an attraction to the same sex. Him and I parted ways for about 5 or 6 years over an argument and were recently re-united. I truly value his friendship as he is such a wonderful person but I often wonder what God thinks about me befriending someone who is so sinful. I really don’t know what to do… LIke i said I value our friendship but I don’t want to give up my place with the Lord over it. Can anyone please give me some advice?
 
please continue to love him as a friend and child of God, but loving someone does not mean lying to them about the consequences of risk-taking behavior, including the moral, spiritual, psychological and physical consequences. If you loved someone addicted to cocaine would you approve and support his choice to continue using?
 
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kristinbk:
Hello. I have a homosexual friend whom I have known for many years. When we met, he was not “out of the closet” yet and him and I were very close. I was the first person he “came out” to and it was very painful for me. I was raised Catholic and so was he. Him and I have sat down many times and I have asked him if he was sure of his choice and he says he can see it no other way. Ever since a child he has felt an attraction to the same sex. Him and I parted ways for about 5 or 6 years over an argument and were recently re-united. I truly value his friendship as he is such a wonderful person but I often wonder what God thinks about me befriending someone who is so sinful. I really don’t know what to do… LIke i said I value our friendship but I don’t want to give up my place with the Lord over it. Can anyone please give me some advice?
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My best friend told me four years ago that he was gay. While he had been repressing it for many years and was apparently caught totally off guard by it himself, after extensive counselling it was confirmed. He continues to be one of my closest friends and is on a spiritual journey I can only look at with awe.

We are called to love all of God’s children, whatever their state in life. Cutting your friend off would reflect badly on both you and on Christianity IMHO and might help drive him from God. I have found it quite possible to love and accept my friend while not condoning actions he might engage in.

We all struggle with sin and as such it would be legitimate for any one of us to say “I don’t want to associate with you because you are a sinner (keeping in mind that we are also on the receiving end of that!).” Of course Jesus told us different and we are called to minister to all, especially those struggling in sin. That doesn’t mean judging their hearts and condemning them; it means loving them even in their sin and helping them carry their crosses. Part of that love include admonishing them and reminding them about God’s will, but that should be done prayerfully and lovingly, and only if you feel genuinely called to do it. There is an old saying, “Talk to God about your friend before talking to your friend about God.”

It’s a fine line to walk, as it is with any friend who might be involved in something that is public and noticeable, but I pray that you can find the strength and wisdom to be Jesus to him without compromising your own beliefs.

Peace,
 
One of my mentors was a homosexual. He spent his life in determined celibacy. He was hardworking, happy, tough. Man, I respected that guy! Once, when I defended him in our workplace, I was shunned for doing so by our fellow employees. Since the black employees in the company thought the whole thing was ridiculous, they asked me to sit with them at lunch. They taught me that incredibly complex form of “Chinese checkers” that blacks play. I got very good at the game. They used to stand in line at lunch time to try to beat me, and a pool formed respecting whether I could be beaten at the game. Ultimately, because my stand on the homosexual man’s case had been just, and because I got along so well with the black employees, when there was a great layoff of middle management in the company, I was the only one retained. So, God watched-out for me, then.
 
The classic line is “Hate the sin; love the sinner.” It’s like cancer. The more you love someone the more you will hate the cancer in them. Stay friends. Show him the love the God commands us to show.
 
As long as the friendship is not an occassion of to him, I would say that you should be his friend. Healthy male friendships are one of the things necessasry to overcoming Same Sex Attractions.
 
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