Honesty on these forums?

  • Thread starter Thread starter cheddarsox
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
40.png
cheddarsox:
Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation?
Click to expand...
I would gladly give my personal opinions, regrets,etc. face to face, or one on one. I don’t feel the need to broadcast my failings as a Catholic and a human being over the net. I sure don’t want my kids to pick it up here before I tell them.
Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?
Click to expand...
I find that stuff too distracting because I use my rear view mirror mostly for pulling out my really long eyebrow hairs.
Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.
Click to expand...
I’ve had, and probably will continue to have, many shameful parts to my life to run from, which oddly enough, ran me straight into the Church.

No one is more suprised than I am.
 
Yeah I have secular stuff on my car. A bumper sticker which says : “I (heart) partial birth abortion.”

Right next to the ones which say: “Hate is not a family value” and “Kerry/Edwards 2004”
 
posted by David_Paul
Click to expand...
Yeah I have secular stuff on my car. A bumper sticker which says : “I (heart) partial birth abortion.”
Click to expand...
Right next to the ones which say: “Hate is not a family value” and “Kerry/Edwards 2004”
Click to expand...
Is this a joke? If so, I recommend little smilies to help emphasize your point. :rotfl: Otherwise at least one is just disgusting.
 
We all have an ideal in our minds of the “perfect Catholic” which we want to live up to but of course, we tend to fail more than we succeed.

Here’s a good example from my own life: For a couple of years I was attending daily Mass where I also led the Rosary. But last fall I got angry with someone for some petty reason, and stopped going to daily Mass (except Sundays) - at first I went somewhere else, then stopped altogether. I stopped praying the Rosary every day too.

Well, this morning I woke up and decided it was time to go back – only to discover that (a) the person I had gotten angry with was no longer there because she’s in the hospital with cancer, and (b) due to the priest shortage today was the last day they were going have daily Mass at this particular church!

Needless to say I do not feel like I have lived up to the image of the “ideal Catholic” during these past few months! And although I left a message with a mutual friend, I will probably not get the chance to apologize to the lady I had the argument with.

I am definitely NOT a perfect Catholic, much less a perfect person. The only thing I can say in my favor is that I’m trying to do better. I think that’s all any of us can say.
 
40.png
cheddarsox:
Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues. But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.
Click to expand...
I think we are more like you than you realize. Like you, I refrain from posting on a lot of threads. If the question is too “revealing” I don’t post. Maybe you see so many super perfect Catholic posts because we don’t post if we think our answer might compromise someone’s faith.
40.png
cheddarsox:
Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation?
Click to expand...
I freely admit in my posts here that I used birth control in the past and stopping it was a struggle. I also tell people how happy I am that I did stop, and how blessed I have been by the large family that I once feared.
40.png
cheddarsox:
Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?
Click to expand...
I skipped that thread. I only read threads that interest me and I’m not interested in things hanging from my rear view mirror.
40.png
cheddarsox:
Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.?
Click to expand...
No, I’m not all that good. I try to be, but I fail miserably. Like the fact that I’m here at all when my children want me to be outside playing with them. I believe my posts are honest, but I certainly don’t share every negative thought or deed I’m guilty of with strangers on the internet. Welcome to Catholic Oggo Boggo land.
 
Thought I ought to interject here - I didn’t mean to imply that my display of many religious items was in any way a merit. It’s what I like to see in my home, but that doesn’t mean that I think it makes me any better. Hope no one thought otherwise! :o
 
40.png
TeriGator:
Thought I ought to interject here - I didn’t mean to imply that my display of many religious items was in any way a merit. It’s what I like to see in my home, but that doesn’t mean that I think it makes me any better. Hope no one thought otherwise! :o
Click to expand...
We have many crosses in our house. I was confirmed and my son received 1st Communion in 2002, my husband was confirmed in 2003 and we had our marriaged blessed that same year. My daughter just received her First Communion. So needless to say with all the gifts we received, there are crosses and religious symbols everywhere in our house. I tell people it’s not just because were Catholic…it’s to keep vampires away! That always gets a laugh. 😃
 
cheddar as someone said, this board isn’t meant to be a confessional. OTOH many of us, myself included, have been very open about our past sins and current struggles particularly if it fits with the particular thread. For example one thread asked people if they’d had premarital sex, whether they regretted it and would they advise young people to engage in the behavior. There were some pretty honest and open posts in response. I have seen several women admit to having abortions and men admit to various sexual sins as well (porn is mentioned frequently.) So I don’t see this as the Goody Two Shoes board but one where people think about the appropriateness of discussing personal issues.

Lisa N
 
I think discretion is the by-word. This is, after all, a public forum: members and non-members can read what is posted. As I recall, on one of the threads, an individual had “goggled” a topic and CAF threads showed up. This, in a sense, makes it a www forum.

I have found the folks of CAF mostly to be unpretentious and also forthright while also exercising discretion. They laugh. They struggle. They weep. And, yes, sometimes they remember this not a confessional. This is their choice and right to do so.

All in all, I’ve found CAF a good place to be with few exceptions. 👍
 
I try to be honest on these forums, but I also try to be polite…After all, I am a guest here. (I’m kinda old fashioned that way…).
As far as my car is concerned, the only thing hanging from my rear view mirror is a :eek: glow-in-the-dark plastic skeleton. I call it:D Mr Bones. (I do carry a rosary with me, but not with the junk on my dash…).
 
I pretty much tell it like it is. Gets me in trouble sometimes, but it keeps life interesting.
~ Kathy ~
 
40.png
cheddarsox:
I’ve been hanging out here for a few months. On the non-catholic forum but also a few others. Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues.

But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.

Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?

Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.

cheddar…whistling, where have all the humans gone?
Click to expand...
Cheddar,

First, let me thank you for your sensitivity about not posting on some threads for fear of shaking someone’s faith. While your motive is very good, I would encourage you to “speak the truth in love;” if anybody’s faith is weak enough to be shaken by anything you would say, it will be shaken by something he sees somewhere else. At least on these forums there will be other people giving the Catholic view, so that the person of weak faith will hear both sides of the issue. But I would encourage you to emphasize the “in love” part, as it is very easy to slip out of it–speaking as one who has done it regularly.

It is probably universal that people are more willing to talk about their strong points than their weak points. It is certainly true of me. To answer your question, though, the mere fact that I am sitting in front of my computer writing posts at 3:30 in the morning should let you know that there is probably something wrong in my life.

Incidentally, I don’t have a rosary hanging from my rear-view mirror. I keep it in a drink holder and pray it every morning on my way to work; the commute is about five minutes longer than the rosary. But this is a private foible of mine.

My motive for not sharing my sins in public is a lot less honorable than not wanting to lead people into temptation. It is simply that I am so embarrassed by them I really don’t want to speak of them. It’s a lot like undressing in public: I would take off my shoes a lot more readily than I would take off my pants.
  • Liberian
 
40.png
cheddarsox:
I’ve been hanging out here for a few months. On the non-catholic forum but also a few others. Because I am not a practicing Catholic, there are lots of threads I refrain from posting on, because I don’t feel it is fair to compromise anyone’s beliefs by offering a non-catholic opinion on some issues.

But lately a few threads have got me wondering about honesty and openess. When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.

Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?

Are you really all that good? Or, do you refrain from sharing who you really are so as not to be an occasion for sin and doubt for others? I can see the good of that, but wow, sometimes I feel like I stumbled into Catholic Oggo Boggo land.

cheddar…whistling, where have all the humans gone?
Click to expand...
I think I am open when it calls for it. As far as birthcontrol I used Norplant early in my marriage but I wasn’t going to church at the time. Once we learned NFP artificial bc went bye bye. But that doesn’t mean we don’t struggle at times. Pregnancy would be very dangerous for me at this point because of my health . There are times when we’d like to be intimate but we can’t. SOmetimes we push the envelope and umm. accidents happen It’s a regular struggle that’s been going on since we started using NFP.

Rear view mirrors -can’t help ya there I don’t have anything hanging from them actually. In fact one car doesn’t have a rear view mirror. (by the way if anyone knows how toi reattatch a rear view mirror so that it actually stays I’d be happy to know).

No not one of us is perfect. I think often time the answer given is what is the church teaching is. There is a risk when you stray from that the person asking will feel justified by thinking well I’m not the only one and continue in that sin.
And this is a site where people tend to take their faith very seriously. (Once in a while I think a little too seriously-sometimes I feel some are a little scrupulous.)
I believe I an open about my struggles when it is appropriate.
 
Who’s perfect? Where? Certainly not me!!! I come here to strengthen what I already believe - it helps me to “stay true” to it in the real world. For me, coming to these forums is a dose of spiritual strength and Catholic friendship.
:angel1:
 
One more thing, when I first came here I didn’t even want to post, I thought it was too “Ned Flanders” but that was because I was coming back into the Church and really didn’t know too much about the Church.
Most people outside or lax in the Church probably don’t even know about this website, or if they do they don’t visit it. I just came here from a link, after searching for a answer, after my brother said something crazy about Catholics. I had no idea www.Catholic.com even existed before then.

Scylla
 
40.png
rayne89:
Rear view mirrors -can’t help ya there I don’t have anything hanging from them actually. In fact one car doesn’t have a rear view mirror. (by the way if anyone knows how toi reattatch a rear view mirror so that it actually stays I’d be happy to know).
Click to expand...
If you still have the old rear-view mirror, you should be able to unscrew a screw that attaches it to the support and then slide the support out. You then have to fix the support to the windshield.

There is a special rear-view-mirror adhesive that auto supply shops sell. Mark with a crayon (on the OUTSIDE) of the windshield the spot where the mirror is supposed to go. Then scrape off the remaining adhesive, doing a final cleanup of the area (on the INSIDE of the windshield) with rubbing alcohol. (Make sure that at least one car door or window is open while using the alcohol.) The adhesives may differ a bit, but usually you break an ampoule to release one half of the adhesive, which you smear over the marked part of the windshield. The other half comes in a tube which you cut open and dab a drop or two on the mirror support. Hold the mirror support against the windshield for a minute or two without moving it; then give it another several hours to set. After it’s dry, you can reattach the mirror and tighten down the attachment screw again.

This isn’t completely permanent, but mine have lasted for a couple of years so far. Usually extremely hot weather degrades the adhesive.

This is a little off the original topic of the forum, perhaps? But I couldn’t resist rising to the bait.
  • Liberian
who lives in Florida and has reattached rear-view mirrors to windshields at least half a dozen times
 
40.png
cheddarsox:
When someone asks a question that could be “revealing” about whether or not someone is a “good” Catholic, very often all the answers are REALLY SUPER PERFECT CATHOLIC.
Click to expand...
A sinner here just trying to earn sainthood. Some posts you may read are possibly from someone older who has already found the answers they need to work towards sainthood. Birth control etc. I am sure there are many who have practiced at one time or another but found the truth about a lot of those things.
40.png
cheddarsox:
Like is there really no one here who has resorted to birth control who is willing to own up to it for the sake of discussion with someone who is all tied in knots over a horrible situation? Does everyone here really have a rosary or saint medal hanging from their rear view mirror and no one has “secular” stuff?
.
Click to expand...
I for one have a rosary. But do have many tied up in knots stories.I will share the one on the rosary for you to show that all of us are not perfect but try to work towards imitating Christ.
When I grew up we prayed the rosary every night. Did I want to? As a young child I wanted to be outside playing with everyone else. I grow up leave the church and turn my back on God. My parents continue to pray never giving up. I’m not married in the church at this time I have two children lie to have them baptized. Two was enough so I was going to get a tubal ligation. The day before I went for the blood work, on the way home my husband and I get in an accident. No one is hurt but a very serious wake up call. So I take the birth control pill and low and behold get pregnant. Nine months later my son is born on The Feast of Our Lady of the Rosary and Right to Life Sunday. So you see many have stories to tell and yet have learned the value of the Mass and or prayers. I am very human but reformed and got married in the church and have done nothing but work for the church and for Christ every since.
 
I am probably one of the biggest sinners on this board, however I don’t go broadcasting my sins. Some are very personal and have been resolved and forgiven in confession. Some aren’t so serious such as my kids drive me nuts sometimes and I lose my patience and yell. I have used birthcontrol in the past(before I was Catholic) don’t use it anymore because now I understand how wrong it is. We actually stopped before I even considered comming home to the Church because of the health reasons and the chance of accidently aborting a baby. I think we don’t broadcast our sins because at least from my point of view I don’t want to scandelize someone. I came from an abusive home and have a lot of guilt that I am dealing with, I still have a relationship with my parents and just am surving one day at a time. We all have our own crosses to bear and we all handle things differently. I am in no way near perfect, however everyday I try to have perfect love for Jesus.
 
Yo, Liberian!
quote:** Liberian**
who lives in Florida and has reattached rear-view mirrors to windshields at least half a dozen times
Click to expand...
I know this is off-topic, but I can resist.
We live in the Great Northeast. Two winters ago,
the snowfall was so high, the streets were narrowed,
and tons of people had their side-view mirrors
knocked off by passing autos.
We have a driveway, so no problem, right?
Wrong.
Ours was ripped off one night by some thoughtful
individual who’s need was apparently greater than
mine for a side-view mirror.😃
heh, heh,
reen12
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top