Horrible Teenage Trend

[Ana]

Peace-bwu:

I was the same way when I was in highschool from 1989-93. I went to a rather impoverished rural highschool, very small class size, heavily Protestant. So the kids should have known better, but I don’t think they were taught that it was wrong. My mom didn’t even know what oral sex was, so most parents probably didn’t talk about it with their teens. In sex ed. it was basically taught as a safe alternative to intercourse. People who had oral sex were still considered virgins.

… 1989-1993 … damn, you mean I can’t blame Bill?

 

[Darrel]

La Chiara:

Ana–Yes, I did have my coffee yesterday morning and every morning. Thanks for asking and thanks for your concern! OP was doing more than “making an observation” IN MY OPINION!! I stated my opinion and I stand by it. I am entitled just as you are entitled to state an opinion, thank you very much. I further stand by my opinion that it serves little productive purpose to make global and sweeping negative “observations” about teenagers today. It tends to turn people negative on the group being criticized (in this case teens). It is not psychologically healthy behavior. I was trying to point out that if the OP is really concerned that he should do something PRODUCTIVE about it. Volunteering is a very positive response (as compared with just disparaging teens on a forum!)

La Chiara,

Nothing I posted anyplace in this thread even comes close to resembling your allegations with regards to my ‘interior motives’. I’m sure your an awsome parent. But if I might offer a word of advice, I would say be careful to not make broad sweeping assumptions about peoples motives based on typed written text. That is unless the good Lord made you psychic. This whole thing was for information purposes and a heads up to any parent good or bad alike. It was also posted out of care and concern for teenagers in general.

-D

 

[stanley123]

Ana:

I am from the NorthEast, as well. Oral sex is not considered sex anymore (thanks to Bill Clinton?), but is on the same level as kissing. Oral sex is a common experience on school buses, even in middle school. And many young ladies I know consider sex to be actual penetration, anything else is just casual and no big deal.

Are these Catholic schools?

 

[Kristina_P]

Casual sex among teenagers is definitely commonplace in some schools and among some groups. In other schools, it’s not nearly as much of a problem. I’ve heard from teachers about kids as young as 12 and 13 casually giving away sexual favors, and I’ve also heard from teachers at other schools about the sensibility of juniors and seniors in high school (not always religious kids) who recognize the value and importance of sex. We should definitely pray for the morality of young people, but don’t allow worry and rumors to get the best of you. Never underestimate a teenager’s rebellious inclination to say that he’s done more than he’s actually done. The bracelet story is an example of an urban legend blown way out of proportion by gossip and irresponsible journalism. Do just a small amount of research, and you’ll find that the whole frenzy is due to a small number of kids trying to make themselves seem like sexual experts.

 

[Ana]

stanley123:

Are these Catholic schools?

No, these that I am speaking of are our public middle schools, sixth, seventh, and eighth grade. I am one of the younger old people in the family, and am on the level of confidente with some of the younger cousins and their friends.

It was brought to my attention when my eleven year old cousin was being harassed to perform oral sex on the bus. A note was found in her belongings. Upon further questioning, it came out that she was under a lot of peer pressure to perform oral sex, and that MOST of her classmates had already done it. Her sister and friend joined in on how such and such did, and such and such did it on the bus, and such and such did it in the bathroom with two guys. This group of girls were 10 and 11 yrs. old.

I do not know of this problem in our local Catholic schools, I have another branch of cousins that attend this school. From hearing the two sets talk, it is a world of difference. Not that they are perfect, but this type of behavior is unheard of!

 

[Ana]

We have also had a severe problem with drugs a few years ago. In our local high school, between the years of 1995 and 2000 there was a heroin epidemic and one of those years SIX teenagers died from a heroin overdose, earning this school the nickname “Heroin High”! It was a huge problem, resulting in a mass educational effort, tons of drug programs and bumper stickers on every car saying HEROIN KILLS.

I don’t understand why they are not addressing the issue of these kids and the oral sex, perhaps because no one has died? When the note in my cousins belongings was found, it was not seen to be a problem. Yet when another child jokingly said to a peer … “I’m gonna kill you”, it was overheard by the bus driver and he was suspended.

I am glad to know if my child is in middle school, he/she will at least be safe from an assault with nail clippers.

 

[Starsweeper]

Whether it started as an urban legend or not, I knew a girl only twelve years old at the time who was wearing one of these bracelets and she said all her friends were too. This was incredibly disturbing to me as you could imagine. Maybe the legend filtered into the general culture and then became true.

 

[bapcathluth]

I graduated in 1980 and high school students in my day were much more likely to drink and smoke in school than the students I have been teaching in the last twenty years do. I know there were sexually active kids back when I was in school as well, but I am in charge of parent education for the PTA at my children’s school and we had an expert come and talk to us about the nonchalant attitude of kids and oral sex.

One can still get sexually transmitted diseases from oral sex. Furthermore, how denigrating is this to girls? They are completely being used and don’t even get anything in return!! This expert told us it goes on in movie theatres and that she doesn’t wear shorts to the movies anymore!!!

 

[Ana]

Kristina P.:

Casual sex among teenagers is definitely commonplace in some schools and among some groups. In other schools, it’s not nearly as much of a problem. I’ve heard from teachers about kids as young as 12 and 13 casually giving away sexual favors, and I’ve also heard from teachers at other schools about the sensibility of juniors and seniors in high school (not always religious kids) who recognize the value and importance of sex. We should definitely pray for the morality of young people, but don’t allow worry and rumors to get the best of you. Never underestimate a teenager’s rebellious inclination to say that he’s done more than he’s actually done. The bracelet story is an example of an urban legend blown way out of proportion by gossip and irresponsible journalism. Do just a small amount of research, and you’ll find that the whole frenzy is due to a small number of kids trying to make themselves seem like sexual experts.

I agree with you for the most part, except for the last sentence. This is not a small number of kids. Bracelets, tabs, peer pressure, or any other reason, ALOT of teens are sexually active. We cannot just shrug this off as a “few bad kids.” This is the norm, and those who choose abstinance until marriage are in the minority (I was in the majority .)

But what can we expect from a society that protects child pornography under the first amendment, glorifies sexual sins (adultery, premarital sex), promotes abortion, hands out condoms in schools, have Britney, Paris, and Lindsey as role models for the girls, and eminem, 50 cent and Jayzee as role models for the boys. For the girls, if they want to be in style, there few clothes options for them that do not look like they are “working,” and the boys are encouraged to look slovenly and where too big clothes. This just adds to their poor conception of dignity.

The casual attitude about sex among teens, is not a few kids making bad decisions, but a large number of children growing up and behaving exactly as society has taught them to. In a sense they are obedient.

They are not a cause of the problem, nor are they “bad.” Their attitudes and misconceptions are a fruit of the tree of the contraceptive mentality in a secular world. Just my opinion.

 

[Christus_Rex]

Oh my gosh, what I’ve read on here has made me feel sick. It’s certainly made me glad to be British! This sort of thing would never happen here! And the story of the school bus I couldn’t believe it! There would be hell to play if someone even mentioned the idea of that on my bus (and it’s not a Catholic school)!

Michael

 

[deaconswife]

The bracelets that you describe as beaded sound like the ones that are sold on a site called bluedragonfly.org. It is a site that is for support for those coping with a number of psychological disorders. It does not promote these disorders but gives people suffering from them a place where they can chat with others who also suffer from them. Red beads for those with anorexia, purple for those with anorexia, black for those who are self injurers, ice blue for those with body dismorphic disorder, and orange for those in recovery from any of these disorders.