How are men supposed to make their romantic intentions known in the aftermath of metoo?

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Irishmom2 said:
I doubt asking for a kiss is necessary. You can tell.
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Sometimes it’s not easy to tell. Maybe I have to ask. It just seems weird to me. I’ve never asked before. Just kind of sensed it and went for it
 
TheLittleLady said:
Dating at work has had sticky wickets for a very long time.
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It can be sticky, but the reality is if you are in a big workplace for 40+ of your waking hours each week, and you’re single, then you’re likely to find people there you’re interested in.

I met my husband at my first job after college. He was in the next cube over. Another guy I knew at that job met his wife in the line for new hire orientation because they had to line up alphabetically and her name began with the same letter as his.
That particular workplace had a male - female ratio of 2:1 and every single woman I knew there, even the older or relatively unattractive ones, eventually found a husband at work.
 
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FloridaCatholic said:
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Irishmom2:
I doubt asking for a kiss is necessary. You can tell.
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Sometimes it’s not easy to tell. Maybe I have to ask. It just seems weird to me. I’ve never asked before. Just kind of sensed it and went for it
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And so, had did that go for you?
 
In the past pretty good. Only once did a girl back away and then I apologized

But most of the time I didn’t go for it
 
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Something has changed in Gen Y folks and beyond. I think parents began to shelter their kids soooo much that they did those kids, now adults, a disservice. They do not have the maturity to handle dating, let alone dating at work.
 
I think this is true. Most of my friends don’t know what they’re doing. I barely do either
 
I see enough of them still managing to have reasonably mature relationships and find spouses that I don’t think it’s totally dead.
I do think there are a lot of grossly immature people of all ages out there and they aren’t all millennials. I noticed throughout my life that a lot of them tended to couple their social and dating relations with consuming a lot of alcohol or other substances. If you stick to the people who are (a) sober and (b) aren’t on Tinder, your odds of finding a mature adult person whose company you can enjoy will increase greatly.

By “sober” I don’t mean “never goes to a bar or drinks a beer”, I mean “isn’t out at the bar getting drunk and looking to hook up”.
 
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Tis_Bearself said:
If you stick to the people who are (a) sober and (b) aren’t on Tinder, your odds of finding a mature adult person whose company you can enjoy will increase greatly.
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But your pool of potential partners goes down exponentially. Who is sober and not on tinder these days?
 
FloridaCatholic said:
But your pool of potential partners goes down exponentially. Who is sober and not on tinder these days?
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Are you kidding me? If you truly believe this is all that’s out there, that everyone is a drinker and on tinder, you need to step back and look at the people you know, or the women you pursue. Raise the bar on your dating standards.
 
That’s why I’d say “take it slower” if you’re interested in a colleague. It’s not a no-go and a lot of people do find spouses at work. But it’s a higher risk of someone feeling pressured or harassed, because you have to work with each other.
FloridaCatholic said:
But your pool of potential partners goes down exponentially. Who is sober and not on tinder these days?
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Most of this forum, for starters. This is really starting to sound like you need new social circles. You’re most of your pool right now isn’t exactly a good pick for a Catholic man.
 
Most women my age who go to mass are married already or are seeing someone. It’s not like there are loads of catholic women

My catholic guy friends are married or they’re on tinder or they’re so socially inept that they’ve never dated. Not many Catholics my age to choose from. And I go to young adult events too
 
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Yes, this whole feminist movement is extremely troubling. In discussing this with friends (all women), we are saddened by the way this has progressed to the point of diminishing men’s ability to act like a man and be a gentleman. If you are on the date and get the feeling you are on the same page then go for it. If she’s not interested she can turn away. No harm done. Not every woman is like what’s so prevalently portrayed in society right now. Just my opinion. Thanks for being respectful enough to consider the question in the first place!
 
You’re telling me you don’t know anybody who limits their social drinking and doesn’t belong to a hookup website? And you’re 27 years old?

Sorry, not buying it.
 
The people you actually want to date. The entire purpose of dating isn’t supposed to be to score as many dates as possible. The purpose is supposed to be to narrow down the entire opposite sex of the human race to one person who you believe you could tolerate living with for the rest of your life. And criteria that eliminates a lot of non-candidates is working in your favor.
 
I know some people that aren’t. but they’re already in a relationship/married.

I really don’t need to defend myself here. If you don’t believe me, that’s fine.
 
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