How can I get my siblings to call our mother?

[kgenoa]

My mother sold the family home at the urging of my siblings. After a brief stint of living alone in my sister’s summer home, she ended up in the hospital. As a result, I have been caring for my mother in my home for 5–6 months now. She has become increasingly depressed due to her own situation but also because my siblings are not calling her at all.

I will say she has been a very good mother, always helping her children and grandchildren whenever they need it. That is why this is so surprising. My father died 2–1/2 years ago and I have urged them on two occasions each to “call your mother” to no avail. I pray for their conversion; they have each left the Catholic Church. I am overwhelmed with caring for her but out of love continue each day to do my best. However, my husband and I are getting burned out and this is just making it harder.

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

If all you have done so far is to tell your siblings, twice in six months, to “call your mother,” then perhaps they have no idea how serious things are for her. Granted, they should not require your prompting to do their duty to remain in contact with her, but you have become her de facto caregiver. As such, your siblings may assume that you have been taking care of things and do not need help.

I recommend contacting a social worker experienced in elder welfare and asking for (name removed by moderator)ut on what you should do to involve your siblings in this process. Perhaps the social worker will help you draft a letter to your siblings, to be sent by certified mail, outlining your mother’s condition and your need for their help. If that does not get an appropriate response, your next step may have to be consulting with a family law attorney.