How can i help my mom with her anxiety and depression?

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Mayra

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I am very worried about my mother. Recently she has lost her appetite and lost so much weight she even fainted once. The doctor has sent her for blood tests and heart testing and he found that she has low potassium all else is fine. Finally the dr sent her to see counselor because he says it is stress and he gave her anxiety pills.
She has always been so strong. But now that there is so many difficulties and family problems it has affected her. I want to help her but i do not know what to say or hoew to help her. I call her to see how she is doing and she sounds so down. any advise is appreciated.
Thank you,
Mayra
 
You can’t help her. You are too close to her. Trust me I know this for a fact. What you can do is get her help. Find a counselor ASAP!!! I would treat this as an emergency. I have been in a very similar situation as yours. As your doctor for a recommendation. Call her insurance company for a recommendation but find one ASAP.
 
Encourage her to follow her doctor’s orders… medication and counseling!.. and PRAY for her!!!
 
noclevername said:
You can’t help her. You are too close to her. Trust me I know this for a fact. What you can do is get her help. Find a counselor ASAP!!! I would treat this as an emergency. I have been in a very similar situation as yours. As your doctor for a recommendation. Call her insurance company for a recommendation but find one ASAP.
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Agreed. The best strategy, most often, is a two-fold action of taking medication and also taking advantage of non-pharmacological methods such as counseling, behavioral therapy etc.

The medicine should be taken long-term, usually for more than 6 months, and often for years. Take care that your mom takes her medication and finds counselor, behavioral therapist ASAP as advised. Years ago the American Medical Association raised alarm that anxiety, depression are not diagnosed and treated enough, causing unnecessary suffering, even though effective medications and treatment methods are available. Also, the medication is best handled by a doctor specialized in psychiatry/psychology because many new and effective medicines have become available lately and it is difficult for a general practitioner to keep up with all of that.
 
Do you live in the same city or town? If you live somewhere else, maybe you could still go to visit her, and help her out where you can. The simple fact that you are there and care about her will already make her feel better (even if you cannot solve those problems that made her anxious and depressed in the first place). Likewise when talking on the phone, it’s not what you say that matters the most. Just call her and chat with her, about anything including the weather or her pets, her garden, her hobby, if she has one. It will make her feel better, because it will distract her a little bit from thinking about those problems.
 
Em_in_FL said:
Encourage her to follow her doctor’s orders… medication and counseling!.. and PRAY for her!!!
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thank you,
i was also thinking if there is a way my sibilings and i can pray for our mother together from long distance maybe pray the rosary at the same time each with their family. we live 1:30 hr away from each other.
Mayra
 
Joseph_L_Varga said:
Do you live in the same city or town? If you live somewhere else, maybe you could still go to visit her, and help her out where you can. The simple fact that you are there and care about her will already make her feel better (even if you cannot solve those problems that made her anxious and depressed in the first place). Likewise when talking on the phone, it’s not what you say that matters the most. Just call her and chat with her, about anything including the weather or her pets, her garden, her hobby, if she has one. It will make her feel better, because it will distract her a little bit from thinking about those problems.
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we don’t live in the same city> i am 7 hrs north of my parents home. your suggestions have been very helpful and comforting. i spoke to her this morning and just chated without asking her about problems or health and it was very nice. she sounded good.🙂
 
My wife has anxiety and depression. It’s a very tiring problem for both of us I think. Imagine being nervous to the point of you being able to feel your heart pounding, feeling like you are going to hyperventilate, where you are physically twitching.

Now imagine having those symptoms for no apparant reason. Just being in a big space, or around a lot of people, or driving. For some reason your brain triggers a fight or flight switch, even when there is nothing to worry about.

When you get nervous for no reason, you don’t want to leave the house, soon you feel like you can’t do things that you used to do, eventually you get depressed and feel like a burden. It’s really hard to deal with.

My wife has been on medication for a long time, the stuff that she was taking “Klonopin” actually started to turn against her and cause her more anxiety than it was helping. What’s worse is, she became dependant on it. So she is trying to ween herself off now and use a different drug. But it’s been slow.

Counseling works and self help CDs seem to help too. You have to find something that releives the anxiety and train yourself to use that technique when it flares up, but it’s a very difficult struggle.

Think about trying to calm yourself down when you are very nervous, it’s hard to do. The only thing I can do is listen, and try to help the best I can. I suggested she pray Hail Marys loudly when she drives, that seems to help when she is in the car.

Beleive it or not breathing is a huge thing. The Hail Marys out loud force her to breathe. The oxygen does something to the system which actually combats the anxiety.
 
A lot of folks (not everybody, but a lot of people) with anxiety, depression, and bad levels of vitamins and minerals mostly need to eat better and relax more. Stuff like B vitamins can make a big difference, especially since most middle-aged women are low on B-12 and D.

Potassium’s a tricky one, because low levels can come from a lot of things. So make sure your mom follows doctors’ orders!
 
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