How can I learn to stop caring?

Status
Not open for further replies.
N

Nelka

New member
I don’t mean I want to stop caring about people in a loving charitable way but why can’t I just say “oh well” and then move on?

I hate it when someone at work makes a mistake and instead of putting their hands up they blame someone else, if that person is me that is blamed for something I haven’t done and I get in trouble I can’t seem to let it go. When I’m at home it goes round and round my head.

Also when people lie about you whether to get you in trouble or make themselves look good in front of the boss I just can’t let it go.

I want to stop caring and not let it bother me but it does and then I make myself look bad because I moan about it.

I end up taking my work problems home and get stressed out. I also don’t want to be around these individuals at work and that makes me look bad for not communicating although I still communicate abut work stuff.

Any help would be appreciated.

Thanks.
 
Nelka said:
I don’t mean I want to stop caring about people in a loving charitable way but why can’t I just say “oh well” and then move on?

I hate it when someone at work makes a mistake and instead of putting their hands up they blame someone else, if that person is me that is blamed for something I haven’t done and I get in trouble I can’t seem to let it go. When I’m at home it goes round and round my head.

Also when people lie about you whether to get you in trouble or make themselves look good in front of the boss I just can’t let it go.

I want to stop caring and not let it bother me but it does and then I make myself look bad because I moan about it.

I end up taking my work problems home and get stressed out. I also don’t want to be around these individuals at work and that makes me look bad for not communicating although I still communicate abut work stuff.

Any help would be appreciated.

Thanks.
Click to expand...
It is a common tendency of certain personality types to harbor negativity rather than releasing it normally…this is especially true among those with neurosis…I would suggest a strategy of utilizing such frustrations in some form of creative pursuit…allowing these emotions to flow from you into a canvas or written work can be fairly therapeutic…
 
I agree than a (healthy) outlet can be really helpful. Trying to squash it all down just makes for explosions later, in my experience.

It’s also OK to be stressed by things that are stressful, provided that the stress motivates you to work on solving the problem. It’s the unhelpful stewing that needs to stop.

Do you have access to counseling? A good counselor can really help with stress management and effective problem solving, including in workplace situations.
 
I struggle with this also. I have become more prayerful and read as much as I could on God’s will. It has helped a lot. I try to put everything in God’s hand, knowing that "His will be done’. Part of the mystery of life is not knowing His will for me or how His will for others will affect me. As you know, it doesn’t feel fair but these events draw me closer to God. I also pray for those who have “wronged” me, imo, and offer my sacrifice of being wringed to God vs. holding on to it. Ultimately, it is about faith and a reminder that God has a plan for Me! “Oh Sacred Heart of Jesus, I plave my trust in Thee”.
 
Is this not being able to let it go, just a work related problem, or in all areas of your life?
If it is only work related, is it specific only to this workplace, or has this happened at other places of employment?

If it has only happened at work, at this particular place, it may be time to look for another job if you can’t move past it when it happens. Unfortunately, sometimes workplace politics, faulty management skills and just plain dishonest, petty people exist. Together. Might be time to move on.
 
Well, by a strange coincidence, I happened to post something about this sort of situation on my blog just yesterday. Here’s how I learned to let go of injuries others have caused me:

reflections911.wordpress.com/
 
Jelrak_TB said:
It is a common tendency of certain personality types to harbor negativity rather than releasing it normally…this is especially true among those with neurosis…I would suggest a strategy of utilizing such frustrations in some form of creative pursuit…allowing these emotions to flow from you into a canvas or written work can be fairly therapeutic…
Click to expand...
Word! I have OCD and tend to focus on stuff like this. I have a blog and I am writing two books too to help move my mind along.

Good advice!

Kat
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top