How did you decide between Catholic or Public school?

[Miraluna]

My sons is going into 6th grade. There are advantages to his public school and disadvantages. One of the biggies is that he loves orchestra and plays the cello. If we opt for the Catholic school, he will not be able to continue with orchestra. He could take private lessons, but it is not the same. Naturally, if the Catholic school really makes a difference in helping him grow in holiness, then that offsets any disadvantage. However, in general, I do not sense that most schools are very orthodox. Some people that I have spoken with about this (not necessarily for the school in the area) feel that religious education in schools can be watered –down and seem more like “good citizen” classes. I would think that a Catholic school would shelter him from being bombarded with secular messages and a negative environment. Can you share with me what helped you decide between private or public?

 

[Rachaellupin]

My sons is going into 6th grade. There are advantages to his public school and disadvantages. One of the biggies is that he loves orchestra and plays the cello. If we opt for the Catholic school, he will not be able to continue with orchestra. He could take private lessons, but it is not the same. Naturally, if the Catholic school really makes a difference in helping him grow in holiness, then that offsets any disadvantage. However, in general, I do not sense that most schools are very orthodox. Some people that I have spoken with about this (not necessarily for the school in the area) feel that religious education in schools can be watered –down and seem more like “good citizen” classes. I would think that a Catholic school would shelter him from being bombarded with secular messages and a negative environment. Can you share with me what helped you decide between private or public?

As a catholic high schooler myself, I thought I might be able to give a little more info, just for consideration. First off, since you are concerned enough about both his education and his faith to even be posting this, I think it’s safe to say that you will be the primary teacher for your son when it comes to his faith. No matter where you choose to send him, in the end, it seems that sadly, most school-lead faith classes aren’t sufficient. In both CCD classes and catholic schools the true religiousness tends to be lacking these days, and even where it can be found, it is usually not enough to prepare him for keeping his faith for the rest of his life.
That being said, you’ve got to make this more about the balance of his class options and his overall environment. On one hand, a public school will be able to provide him with a much better range of classes, teachers, and resources than a private one. Not only will he be able to continue with the cello, but he will be given the option of more advanced and diverse classes. On the other hand, it is also true that he will have to be able to defend his faith in an increasingly secular environment, but such is life. What you’re worried about, of course, is if he’ll be able to handle it. Sadly, the children at catholic schools in our area are well known for having just as many problems with drugs and promiscuity as the public schools. However, I will also say that I’ve never known a catholic high schooler who wasn’t able to defend their faith, and I’ve known a lot of public schoolers who’ve lost theirs. Again, it’s up to you to be his primary teacher and example.
Lastly, I was wondering – have you asked his opinion on the matter?

 

[rpp]

Is home-schooling an option?

 

[EeyoresButerfly]

I did not become Catholic until adulthood so I have a slightly different take on this:

I will most likely never send my children to a parochial school. It seems that in most areas public schools have greater resouces, and there is something to be said for being exposed to a diversity of ideas. Another consideration is that not all students or teachers will be Catholic, and even those that are may not agree or be in line with the church teachings. In my hometown, the kids at the Catholic high school were considered just as bad as the kids at the public high school.

I felt I benefitted a lot from public school, certainly many more resources than most parochial schools have. As another person said, you will be his main religious instructor and set the example. From what I have observed of students in parochials schools, they are no more “holy” than the kids who go to public school. In fact, for my education program I worked with classes in both the public and Catholic school here in town. By far the rudest group of kids was the Catholic school. I was absolutely appalled at their behavior, it was not Christian at all, and I’m sure much of that had to do with the fact that the teacher was not Catholic and was not even a certified teacher which is not necessarily uncommon at a Catholic school.

 

[rpp]

I did not become Catholic until adulthood so I have a slightly different take on this:

I will most likely never send my children to a parochial school. It seems that in most areas public schools have greater resouces, and there is something to be said for being exposed to a diversity of ideas. Another consideration is that not all students or teachers will be Catholic, and even those that are may not agree or be in line with the church teachings. In my hometown, the kids at the Catholic high school were considered just as bad as the kids at the public high school.

I felt I benefitted a lot from public school, certainly many more resources than most parochial schools have. As another person said, you will be his main religious instructor and set the example. From what I have observed of students in parochials schools, they are no more “holy” than the kids who go to public school. In fact, for my education program I worked with classes in both the public and Catholic school here in town. By far the rudest group of kids was the Catholic school. I was absolutely appalled at their behavior, it was not Christian at all, and I’m sure much of that had to do with the fact that the teacher was not Catholic and was not even a certified teacher which is not necessarily uncommon at a Catholic school.

As soneone who has attended secular private schools and public schools, as well as raised a son, I can tell you that the pulic schools in the USA are a
othing less than morally offensive. I am not table to disagree with the assertion that a parent who chooses to send their child to public school when they have other options commits a grave sin.

Public schools afre morally bankrupt. They all promote acceptance of homosexual activity and heterosexual acts outside of marriage. they promote artificial contraception and enable thosde who seek abortions. Public schools in hte USA are moral cesspools. Suggestions that they are morally acceptable are founded on lies.

It is important to point out that this poster rejects the Church’s teachings on contraception.

 

[EeyoresButerfly]

You obviously did not attend the schools in my area or the school I just finished my student teaching at (where we even had prayers before faculty meetings). I guess since I am a public school teacher that makes me morally bankrupt as well.

That is a pretty harsh judgment to make. I don’t think Catholic schools are the be all to end all. Many Catholic schools are incapable of teaching students with disabilities forcing families who want their children to have any kind of education to send them to public school. Would you call such families morally bankrupt?

I went through public school and never once did I hear anything about homosexuality one way or the other. Nor abortion, nor anything else. Sure, any of the students there did not practice a Christian lifestyle because they weren’t Christian, but I chose not to associate with them.

I have many friends who have been to the parochial schools in this area and they are no better than the public schools. Many of the teachers and students are not Catholic. Many of the teachers do not even have proper certification. The students who go to these schools, at least in my area, are just like the public school kids. They go out and have sex, drink, smoke. The one classroom I was required to work with for my degree treated me worse than any of the multitude of public school classrooms. There were no Catholic values evident whatsoever.

Now, there are some amazing parochial schools out there. I’m not saying there are not. But just because it is Catholic does not make it a good school, nor does it mean that the students and teachers are any “better” than those at the public schools. A lot will depend on the particular area.

 

[EeyoresButerfly]

I also wanted to say that I do not reject the Church’s teachings on contraception and have never said so. I fully agree with them and to state otherwise is to defame my name. I have never once stated that contraception is okay and have no idea why you would even say that.

 

[rotlex]

As soneone who has attended secular private schools and public schools, as well as raised a son, I can tell you that the pulic schools in the USA are a
othing less than morally offensive. I am not table to disagree with the assertion that a parent who chooses to send their child to public school when they have other options commits a grave sin.

Public schools afre morally bankrupt. They all promote acceptance of homosexual activity and heterosexual acts outside of marriage. they promote artificial contraception and enable thosde who seek abortions. Public schools in hte USA are moral cesspools. Suggestions that they are morally acceptable are founded on lies.

It is important to point out that this poster rejects the Church’s teachings on contraception.

Wow, that’s pretty harsh on public education!

Not to go off track from the orignal post, but, when I grew up, I went to public schools, the Catholic schools, and a good portion of the kids that went to them, were far more “corrupt” than most that I knew where I went. Why? Many of them were spoiled little rich kids. You want to talk about drugs and alcohol? If someone wanted “the good stuff”, you went to the local Catholic high school. You wanted the wildest parties? You went to the kids house who went there too! I won’t go on about this, other than to say don’t think sending your kids to a private\Catholic school is going to keep them cleaner than that morally corrupt public school.

As far as my wife and I, and our children? We send our kids to public schools. IMO, they are better funded, provide more opporunities, and while yes, it may expose them to things we don’t care for, it also provides them more opportunities for growth and development in other areas such as music, sports etc. etc. As far as their religious education? They get that at home, as well as at CCD.

Lastly, I would still consider Catholic schools in my area, even with the issues I raise above, if it were not for the fact that it would cost us about as much as it is going to cost us to send our kids off to college down the road. (This would not bother me as much either, if they actually offered all the opportunities that I mention above as well).

My opinions only, your mileage may vary.

 

[eliza3b]

How would I chose which school to send my son to?

First, I’d visit both schools during the school day and observe the teachers, administration and students. I might even try to sneak into the cafeteria and observe the students during free time.

Then I’d come up with a course plan for my child. Are the academics equivalent? Does my child do well with academic competition or is he better with a more “laissez-faire” approach to education? Does my child have a lot of friends? Would he benefit from an established sports program or does he lean towards more arts, dramatic arts, journalism, etc. If my child is a boy, I’d like to know how many male teachers & administrators are on staff. How does the school handle children who may need extra help or support in class?

On the religious front: I’ve attended public, parochial and private Catholic schools throughout my academic career. Just about everything I’ve learned about my faith has come from my parents and my family. In fact, my college (prestigious Jesuit univerisity) did more to harm my faith and understanding of Christ than anything else I can think of that ever happened in my public high school. Don’t be so overly impressed with labels.
Labels can fool you.

 

[budgie2]

I don’t live in the US but in Britain. Just to say I agree with another poster that over here there is a lack of faith based education in public schools, little teaching on sexual morality and no teaching on the morality of abortion. If it’s a fee paying school some children could be put under materialistic pressure to wear certain clothes, compare jobs of parents etc. I personally would only my children to Catholic school and persue orchestra outside of school. I was a member of two orchestras that were unrelated to my school. Hope it helps.

 

[rpp]

{snip}

It is important to point out that this poster rejects the Church’s teachings on contraception.

I also wanted to say that I do not reject the Church’s teachings on contraception and have never said so. I fully agree with them and to state otherwise is to defame my name. I have never once stated that contraception is okay and have no idea why you would even say that.

It appears I have confused this member with another. :doh2: I sincerely apologize.

 

[rpp]

I have no experience with Catholic or other parochial schools so I cannot compare them. I can only compare secular private schools, public schools and homeschooling. My opinion about them is formed based on what I have observed bother when I was in school and my son’s experience. When children can be expelled from school without recourse because they happened to have a couple of Advil on them, yet if two students were having gay sex in the bathroom and nothing is done, I would certainly say that qualifies as morally bankrupt.

Were God to ever give me the responsibility for raising another child I would do anything I could to ensure that child was home-schooled.

 

[KingAlfred]

My sons is going into 6th grade. There are advantages to his public school and disadvantages. One of the biggies is that he loves orchestra and plays the cello. If we opt for the Catholic school, he will not be able to continue with orchestra. He could take private lessons, but it is not the same. Naturally, if the Catholic school really makes a difference in helping him grow in holiness, then that offsets any disadvantage. However, in general, I do not sense that most schools are very orthodox. Some people that I have spoken with about this (not necessarily for the school in the area) feel that religious education in schools can be watered –down and seem more like “good citizen” classes. I would think that a Catholic school would shelter him from being bombarded with secular messages and a negative environment. Can you share with me what helped you decide between private or public?

Public schools in America today are rife with immoral student behavior and attitudes. Most of the teachers in public schools are left-of-center in their personal political beliefs, and generally don’t approve of religion, especially Christianity. The bigger the school, the worse these problems will be, without exception. The power of negative peer pressure in public schools is immense, and the ruin of many, many otherwise decent kids. Our schools reflect the worst aspects of our culture, which is generally declining, anyway.

 

[tcm22]

Both of my kids attend Catholic schools and have done so since Kindergarten. That said, the schools in my area are excellent and I would have no qualms about sending my kids there to get an education. I’ve lived in places where that’s not the case and the school systems are little more than welfare for people with education degrees and the kids are an afterthought.

We are also blessed with one of the finest Catholic schools systems of any Archdiocese in the country. Luckily for me, it’s not a question of choosing between the lesser of two evils. While my children would get a great education at public school, that education would not be Christ-centered.

Our public school system is well-run and professional, but they are forced to balance the ever-tougher challenges of political correctness and rigid secularization that plague the rest of society. I don’t want my children to have to put their faith aside when they walk through the doors of a public school. While I don’t expect a public school to promote faith formation, in today’s environment school has become a “no religion zone” in many places, if not outright hostile in others.

Our Catholic schools may not have the resources of the public schools, but there are other advantages.

• The teachers are extremely dedicated. Most aren’t there for the money.
• My kids live and work in a Catholic culture all day, every day. Faith and morals as taught by the Church are integrated into their daily lives. The have a seamless experience with family, parish, and school. Public schools can’t offer that.
• They get to have Christmas and Easter break. They can talk about family holiday traditions and events without “offending” non-Christians.
• Typically (though not always) the parents at parochial schools are better engaged and better informed. If nothing else, parents had to go out of the way to find and register their kids at a Catholic school. That shows a minimal level of initiative.

I don’t know that there’s a “best” answer to the question. It depends on the quality of the schools, financial resources, convenience (most Catholic schools don’t have bus service), and other family considerations.

Catholic schools are the right choice for my kids. We made that decision after prayerful consideration and discussion of alternatives. It might not be the right choice for others based on different circumstances. The key is to evaluate options based on your values and priorities and NEVER look for a “one size fits all” solution to the education of your children.

What works for my kids in a medium sized mid-west city may not work in a small town in New England or downtown Los Angeles.

 

[Em_in_FL]

I think a lot of variables are in this question…
how good are the public schools?
how catholic is the catholic school?
cost?
activities (orchestra)?
son’s opinion?
what’s the religious education for public school kids like at the parish?

And no one here has the exact same situation as you do, so you really need to lay out the pros and cons for YOUR particular situation and pray on it.

I grew up going to public schools - which are fabulous in our area. I have a strong leaning towards sending high school kids to public schools because I think it’s an important time for kids that age to learn how to defend their faith. By that point most have received confirmation and it’s time to put that faith into action. I was also a musician and would have never had the same experience at a Catholic school.
However, I do see the benefit of Catholic schools for elementary and middle school. In fact, I send my own kids to Catholic school (oldest is finishing Kindergarten, younger ones are in Catholic daycare/preschool). It’s a decision we fretted on until the very last possible moment - we prayed A LOT and felt God pulling us toward the Catholic school for our kids.

No one’s opinion is going to fully understand YOUR position - so lay out the pros and cons and PRAY.

 

[HouseArrest]

It definitely depends on the schools in your area, because there are some Catholic schools that are not really Catholic and that would be a detriment, in my opinion, to have so called Catholics teaching the exact opposite of what your kids are there for.

I don’t agree with those who say it is not worth the Catholic school experience because other kids in the Catholic school are “doing the drugs, sex, contracepting, etc”. Some kidsand adults for that matter, will always ignore what they are being taught. That is not a reason not to teach it.

 

[musicality]

Personally, I would do what my parents did. Send your kids where you think they will get the best education up until 8th grade. Then, let them choose where they want to go to high school.

(For me, this meant I got a great education in public school up through 8th grade, and then I went to Catholic high school.)

Of course, if it is obvious to you that one school would be far better for your children than another school, send them there. If not, let them choose when they’re old enough.

 

[EeyoresButerfly]

As a public school teacher, I would like to comment on a previous post that public school teachers are all left of center, hate religion, without exception.

In the school where I just completed my student teacher both my mentor teacher and I were Catholic and attended the same church. She chose not to send her son to the Catholic School because the school here does not have the resources of the public school, especially given her son’s disabilities.

I can not tell you the specific denomination of all the teachers in this particular school, but the vast majority of them were Christian of some sort. We even had prayer before our faculty meetings- and this was a public school!

The school where I completed my pre-internship (well over 100 hours in a variety of classrooms) was very similar. By far the majority of teachers were church goers and there were faith based clubs that students could choose to be a part of.

I had the same experience growing up. Although my teachers never specifically came out and said it, I know the majority of them were church goers. I chose to make friends with those who went to church and attended Bible Study meetings.

I cannot tell you about the staff at the school where I start teaching in August, but I know that I am Catholic. Is religion taught in public schools? No. That would be illegal. But personally I like the idea of separation of church and state. Our kids have to work in the real world where they will be exposed to a variety of ideas. Religious education should take place both in home and in church. As long as your children are being taught their beliefs somewhere, I don’t think it matters where they go to school.

No school is perfect, so you need to pick the one that is best going to fit your family and your circumstances.

 

[tcm22]

As a public school teacher, I would like to comment on a previous post that public school teachers are all left of center, hate religion, without exception.

In the school where I just completed my student teacher both my mentor teacher and I were Catholic and attended the same church. She chose not to send her son to the Catholic School because the school here does not have the resources of the public school, especially given her son’s disabilities.

I can not tell you the specific denomination of all the teachers in this particular school, but the vast majority of them were Christian of some sort. We even had prayer before our faculty meetings- and this was a public school!

The school where I completed my pre-internship (well over 100 hours in a variety of classrooms) was very similar. By far the majority of teachers were church goers and there were faith based clubs that students could choose to be a part of.

I had the same experience growing up. Although my teachers never specifically came out and said it, I know the majority of them were church goers. I chose to make friends with those who went to church and attended Bible Study meetings.

I cannot tell you about the staff at the school where I start teaching in August, but I know that I am Catholic. Is religion taught in public schools? No. That would be illegal. But personally I like the idea of separation of church and state. Our kids have to work in the real world where they will be exposed to a variety of ideas. Religious education should take place both in home and in church. As long as your children are being taught their beliefs somewhere, I don’t think it matters where they go to school.

No school is perfect, so you need to pick the one that is best going to fit your family and your circumstances.

I do agree with you wholeheartedly that you have to choose the school that fits your circumstances.

What concerns me as a citizen isn’t that religion isn’t taught in public schools (I went to public schools my whole life), but the increasing hostility to religious expression of any sort. Faith-based clubs are a result of hard fought court battles by determined believers, not through the benevolence of the various public school districts. Some places are better than others, but the trend across the US is increasing hostility to religion in the public arena. That’s NOT what the Founders had in mind.

 

[Mommyoftwo]

I went to Catholic school for 12 years and have nothing but wonderful things to say about these schools.

Unfortunately, the schools were some distance away from my home. I always felt somewhat lost between two worlds. The distance made it hard to be involved with after school activites and my school friends were scattered all over the place. I did have friends and activities in my neighborhood but still felt somewhat out of place. Since I wasn’t part of my parishes CCD program it was even hard to make friends in my church.

I think that community is very important. Therefore, (assuming of course that the public schools in the area are good) we will be sending our children to their local school.