How do I approach our pastor?

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I’ve recently started attending daily mass at my parish. There are several priests in residence at my parish, all of whom are good priests.

However, there is a priest from a religious community down the street, who comes to celebrate daily mass at our church a couple of days a week. I’ve never seen him on a Sunday and he doesn’t live at the rectory. This priest regularly changes the text to gender neutral language, but has this particular habit of dropping gender words throughout the mass whenever he thinks he can.

For example, he says “Pray my brothers and sisters that this sacrifice may be acceptable to God, the Almighty” - not “God, Almighty Father.” At first I thought he just slipped, but he’s now done this each of the six times I’ve had him for daily mass. Or he will remove any mention of “Father” or “Son” during the Eucharistic prayer, whichever one he chooses. He also says the Doxology this way: “Through Christ, With Christ, In Christ, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, all glory and honor is yours Almighty God, forever and ever, Amen”

Our parish is fairly traditional and devout, and we are not the sort of parish that likes this sort of thing.

Our pastor is currently on summer vacation with his extended family, and is coming back next week. I would like to know whether posters think I should tell our pastor. My pastor and I are pretty good friends, and I have a position with the parish, but I’m not sure whether I should leave him an email or voicemail, or just wait until he’s had a chance to re-acclimate to the parish for a few days before springing this on him. After mass today one of our parishoners came up to me on the way out and told me how horrified she was by this non-conforming liturgy, and that she herself wanted to talk to our pastor about it ASAP. Another parishoner has said the same to me.

I guess this comes down to: I’m worried about not being charitable. I don’t want to be a Pharisee, holier-than-thou type. Maybe I should wait and let someone else handle it?
 
It’s bothering you, thus possibly troubling others as you mention yours is a conservative parish, so the kindest thing would be to quietly and respectfully speak to your pastor about your concerns and leave it to him to speak with the visiting priest.

This priest possibly has been influenced by individuals or groups who feel offended by inclusive language, and perhaps only requires a quiet word for your pastor to fit his goodwill to your particular parish.

Bless you, Trishie
 
Is it possible for you, or another concerned parishioner, to make an audio or video recording of this priest and his misuse of language? Many cellphones have a voice recorder which can be used unobtrusively so that could be one option. With evidence on hand you could then make a better case to your pastor and things might be dealt with faster. I think you are right to wait a day or two after his return to speak to him about the matter in person. Just as a family has something important to tell Dad who has just returned from a trip they may wait a short time, for the right time, to tell him all the problems that happened while he was away…
 
Thanks for your thoughts. I think that waiting a bit is the right way to go, and maybe talk to him about it in person, quietly, without making a big deal out of it. He may already be aware of the problem with this priest for all I know. I’m not sure I’d feel comfortable recording this priest, to be honest, I don’t in fact think he would deny that he does it.
 
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