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Cowfold
Guest
Good advice J but, with all due respect, I suspect you have not read the thread in it’s entirety.
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TiggerS
Guest
No comments from jpk who initiated the thread? 
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Cowfold
Guest
And why am I not surprised??No comments from jpk who initiated the thread?
J
Joseph629
Guest
Hi Cowfold,
Yes I had read the entire thread. I was just emphasizing (as others said) the need for spiritual direction. I suppose I could have prefaced my post with: “As other people have suggested, and I most heartily encourage…”
I also could have said this truthful fact: I have had the same spiritual director for 38 years now (since 1972), and he (at this point) can certainly be labeled as one the “most influencial persons of my life”. Thanks be to God for monastic spiritual directors.
Thanks Cowfold.
J
Janechantal53
Guest
Could you explain your life as a hermit, please? A number of posters sound confused as well. Are you holed up in an apartment or living in the desert somewhere? Is this your idea alone or is there faith community involvement. More information would help me to give you an appropriate answer.
I
IrishEddieOHara
Guest
I am a convert to the Church and after my wife passed away, I thought that God was calling me to the monastic life. I spent all of Lent and Passion Week at Holy Trinity monastery in 2007.
What I found out when I really got my answer from God just shocked me. On the last day of the stay there, I was shown very plainly that I was attracted to that life because I am basically a very selfish and self-centered person. I was told to go home and to learn to love people, not hole up by myself in a cell.
In retrospect, after two years of struggling to love people and failing more than succeeding, I have come to realize that I was more attracted to the life because I honestly, in sinful pride, wanted the attention that becoming a monk would have gotten me. I wanted to think well of myself and being a monk would have allowed me to do so.
Now…guess what? I get to be a sinner who strives to live the Gospel and love God and people and fail and confess it. That is real life.
I notice something in your post that catches my eye – your saying that you used drugs, drinking, etc. I was in that life myself, and it tells me a lot about you. You are probably, like me, an obsessive compulsive person with addictive traits. It is very easy for us to substitute religion for drugs, booze, and sex. It is still an addiction, but it is now a respectable one. With religion as our addiction, we can choose to live in what appear to be very pious ways while all the time we are simply feeding our ego needs. That what addictive people do. I speak from painful self awareness here, honed over many years of coming to grips with the “self” that I am.
I totally agree that you MUST have a spiritual director. The man who is his own spiritual director has a fool for a client. We are much too easily fooled by our own passions and the devil who hates us and can so easily manipulate us. Don’t be surprised that it is not God at all who is “forcing me back to being a hermit” but the evil one who wants to screw up your Christian walk for Christ.
Get thee to a director!!! You need to talk, and I don’t mean just about being a hermit. You need to be open about your past and the things that drove you to self-medicate your emotional pain away through drugs. Your conversion gave you a sense of the love and self-worth you have been seeking, but now that is wearing thin and because it isn’t “doing it” any more for you, you are tempted to go back to that which seemed to work for you at one time. Again, I know this because I have myself walked through this emotional minefield.
Finally, know that people do care for you. Being part of a parish will allow you to make friends who will give you the love you are craving. God loves you, but people are many times His way of expressing it.
Go in peace, and if I can be of help, let me know. I think we have a lot in common and perhaps God has brought me to where I am now (still needing to grow) to help others who are struggling with the first steps in this walk.
What I found out when I really got my answer from God just shocked me. On the last day of the stay there, I was shown very plainly that I was attracted to that life because I am basically a very selfish and self-centered person. I was told to go home and to learn to love people, not hole up by myself in a cell.
In retrospect, after two years of struggling to love people and failing more than succeeding, I have come to realize that I was more attracted to the life because I honestly, in sinful pride, wanted the attention that becoming a monk would have gotten me. I wanted to think well of myself and being a monk would have allowed me to do so.
Now…guess what? I get to be a sinner who strives to live the Gospel and love God and people and fail and confess it. That is real life.
I notice something in your post that catches my eye – your saying that you used drugs, drinking, etc. I was in that life myself, and it tells me a lot about you. You are probably, like me, an obsessive compulsive person with addictive traits. It is very easy for us to substitute religion for drugs, booze, and sex. It is still an addiction, but it is now a respectable one. With religion as our addiction, we can choose to live in what appear to be very pious ways while all the time we are simply feeding our ego needs. That what addictive people do. I speak from painful self awareness here, honed over many years of coming to grips with the “self” that I am.
I totally agree that you MUST have a spiritual director. The man who is his own spiritual director has a fool for a client. We are much too easily fooled by our own passions and the devil who hates us and can so easily manipulate us. Don’t be surprised that it is not God at all who is “forcing me back to being a hermit” but the evil one who wants to screw up your Christian walk for Christ.
Get thee to a director!!! You need to talk, and I don’t mean just about being a hermit. You need to be open about your past and the things that drove you to self-medicate your emotional pain away through drugs. Your conversion gave you a sense of the love and self-worth you have been seeking, but now that is wearing thin and because it isn’t “doing it” any more for you, you are tempted to go back to that which seemed to work for you at one time. Again, I know this because I have myself walked through this emotional minefield.
Finally, know that people do care for you. Being part of a parish will allow you to make friends who will give you the love you are craving. God loves you, but people are many times His way of expressing it.
Go in peace, and if I can be of help, let me know. I think we have a lot in common and perhaps God has brought me to where I am now (still needing to grow) to help others who are struggling with the first steps in this walk.
C
Cowfold
Guest
This thread gets better!
Now we have another
Now we have another
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Milliardo
Guest
Why would you even like such a lifestyle? If you begin to become comfortable with it, then you must be indulgent on yourself. It is not a life to like; it is made purposely such in order for one to get out of this world and focus on God. If you are beginning to like the life of a hermit, then soon you will become lax and negligent; it becomes easy for you. Glorify God that He made you hate such a life, for then you will have to bear it and becomes a cross for you. That is good; it then leads you to become more Christlike through your struggles. Just never cease praying, and pray God does not make you comfortable in your life as a hermit. He has granted you a big grace–wear it with dignity.
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Cowfold
Guest
They are forming a line now!!!
J
jpk1313
Guest
Thank you… I knew there was bound to be at least one person out there with something relevent to say.
I
IrishEddieOHara
Guest
I’m sorry. I could not disagree more if I tried. I am currently reading a GIFTS OF THE DESERT which discusses the monks of Mt. Athos. I see nothing in there which tells me that they HATE their life. There is a difference between hating your life and finding it hard. It seems to me that if one is called to the life of a hermit or a monk, that God waits for Him there with grace to find that life bearable, even as a Cross. The way you describe it makes it sound like Jesus is not there helping you to bear your cross.
I still think that discussion with a spiritual elder as your director, especially someone who is familiar with the life, would be of great value to you. Crosses are not meant to be pleasant, but the way you describe what you are going through seems wrong to me.
I still think that discussion with a spiritual elder as your director, especially someone who is familiar with the life, would be of great value to you. Crosses are not meant to be pleasant, but the way you describe what you are going through seems wrong to me.
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Cowfold
Guest
NURSE!! NURSE!! They are out of they’re beds again.
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Milliardo
Guest
It is not so much that they hate it as they see it more as a joyful cross; certainly it is not a life to like, either! Anyone who thinks he wants to be a hermit must start to examine his life immediately, since the life of a hermit is not easy. But to bear it–that is the joy of a monk. To live it is a joy to him, yet it is not for everyone. The monks live for Christ and pray to Him for us.
Perhaps for the TS this is the actual start of his spiritual journey; we do not know. We can only pray that his struggles would lead towards a more Christlike life.
J
Janechantal53
Guest
Relax Cowfold… FYI the posts suggesting that the original poster is perpetrating a hoax were not seen on my computer and apparently not on others as well. For some reason CAF did not notify me of them. Your posts looked entirely inappropriate. If it’s true that this hermit was partying recently, has V.D. and a girlfriend, as another poster suggested, then it might be a good idea if he really does become a hermit if only to refrain from giving others his disease!NURSE!! NURSE!! They are out of they’re beds again.
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Cowfold
Guest
Inappropriate?Relax Cowfold… FYI the posts suggesting that the original poster is perpetrating a hoax were not seen on my computer and apparently not on others as well. For some reason CAF did not notify me of them. Your posts looked entirely inappropriate. If it’s true that this hermit was partying recently, has V.D. and a girlfriend, as another poster suggested, then it might be a good idea if he really does become a hermit if only to refrain from giving others his disease!
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Hidden_One
Guest
General Reminder:
The supreme law is the good of souls.
The supreme virtue is charity.
Without humility, there is no virtue at all.
The supreme law is the good of souls.
The supreme virtue is charity.
Without humility, there is no virtue at all.
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