How do I perform my duty as godmother?

[12Mary12]

I am the godmother of my grandson, age 6.

His parents were married in the Church but have since divorced. The child was baptized in the Church as an infant. His godfather has passed away. Both father and mother were present and participated in the baptism, as well as other family members (on mother’s side). Before the divorce I took the child to daily noon Mass several days a week with the knowledge and approval of both parents. The parents are now divorced and there is now a custody dispute.

• His father is a non-Catholic.
• His mother is now a non-practicing Catholic.
• That leaves me, as the godmother, to raise the child in the faith.
  Problem #1. The current custody agreement allows the mother only four days of custody per month. I have no legal rights/access to the child per state law altho the Mother is very cooperative and generous about time with the child.

Problem #2. Since the divorce the father has become very hostile to the Church and refuses to allow the child to attend Catholic school, even tho I am willing to pay the tuition. The father has told the child he is NOT Catholic. The child now refuses to make the sign of the cross. The father has final say over the religious education of the child.

Problem #3. Mother is comfortable and cooperative with raising the child in the Church. But taking the child to Mass is difficult due to the custody schedule and, again, father has final say over religious education of the child.

Problem #4. The custody arrangement will not allow for the child to attend religious education so he can receive the sacraments.

Problem #5. The father is hostile and unwilling to even discuss simple issues, such as clothing, general health of the child, etc. I have tried to speak to him in the past and he was non-responsive.

How do I perform my duty as godparent?

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

If the child’s father is hostile to the faith, has final say over the child’s religious education, and you have no ability to take the child to Mass yourself, I’m afraid there’s not a whole lot you can do to directly educate the child in the faith. The ability of godparents to provide a Catholic education for a child is dependent on and subordinate to the parents.

I recommend reiterating to the child’s mother (and his father, if possible) that you stand willing to provide a Catholic education for the child, but will respect their freedom to educate the child as they see fit. Presuming that they choose to continue as they have been, all you can do then, at least for the remainder of the boy’s childhood, is to pray for the child and to offer up spiritual sacrifices for his eventual conversion.