How do you explain Catholic morality on sex and marriage to a non believer?

[shannyk]

I’m lost at where to begin explaining this…

This person was not brought up in any faith at all. Has no ideas of morality except for what is illegal being wrong. The idea of people waiting to have sex until marriage seems like an entirely foreign and silly concept to him. The idea of marriage as a sacrament is lost entirely on this person. I’d like to explain but don’t know where to even start because the base concepts aren’t even there…I can’t start with ‘God’ because they are not entirely convinced there is a God let alone someone who would care about our sex lives.

He keeps asking me to explain, so I want to be able to. Getting a good answer from me may spark even more interest in the Faith who knows…

I’m thinking someone who is a convert would have some good suggestions? Hopefully something very simple and straightforward as this person will be turned off by complicated explanations…

Help anyone???

 

[Joan_M]

Actually, you must start with God!

The person wants you to explain. If I were in your position I would start:

“I realize that you are not sure that there is a God. However, I can only explain Catholic morality on sex and marriage from the Catholic standpoint, since I am Catholic and believe in God. I must ask you to put aside your lack of belief and listen to my explanation from this point of view.”

Then, I would explain, to the best of my ability - knowing that I may not be able to get across what I really want to get across. But, we must start somewhere.

 

[Truly_Beloved]

I haven’t really thought of this for very long, but here goes.

Sexually transmitted diseases are the best secular argument against premarital sex, IMHO. If you wait until you’re married, and only have sex with the person you’re married to, then you will not suffer from or die of an STD. Marriage is a nice civil institution that, in a way, is a sort of “contract” – Where you say you won’t have sex with anyone else but your spouse, and your spouse won’t have sex with anyone else but you, and both of you can avoid getting a nasty STD and putting your kids at risk.

I hope there aren’t any holes in my argument. I’m not feeling well today, so I’m not really thinking critically, I don’t think.

 

[whatevergirl]

Hi shanny;

Since we were all created by God, we are all in different relationships with Him. Some are angry with Him, some worship Him, some claim to not believe in Him. I don’t believe in non-believers, or atheists, to be honest. I believe that everyone is in a different relationship, and on a different walk with God, or away from Him. I believe the person you speak of, is in a way, in a position of walking away from God, or in a state of just not feeling personally close to God. I have always looked at conversations with self professed atheists as not a challenge of ‘getting them to believe,’ but rather in just asking them questions of where they are, in relation to God. Trying to get someone to believe in a Christian view of morality (saving one’s self for marriage is not just a Catholic point) without fully understanding his/her relationship to God, is like teaching someone how to read Hamlet, when he/she doesn’t know his/her abc’s, yet. I would try to help this person with his/her relationship to God, and then, once that person grows in his/her relationship…the rest should follow suit.

Hope I’ve made some sense. lol

 

[gardenswithkids]

I’m lost at where to begin explaining this…

This person was not brought up in any faith at all. Has no ideas of morality except for what is illegal being wrong. The idea of people waiting to have sex until marriage seems like an entirely foreign and silly concept to him. …He keeps asking me to explain, so I want to be able to. …Hopefully something very simple and straightforward as this person will be turned off by complicated explanations…

Help anyone???

You could start with the basics of sex and reproduction. Sexual intercourse between an adult male and an adult female is how most species in the animal kingdom reproduce. The sex drive is strong.

Humans developed contraception as a way to have intercourse without reproducing, but if they really simply didn’t want to reproduce they could refrain from sex. (You could also tie this into Catholic teachings about the dignity of human life and how children are blessings.) People who don’t want children often don’t want to abstain from sex either because sex means something else. What? Find out what your friend thinks sex means. If your friend repeatedly asks for explanations, it may be because down deep your friend knows that he’s missing something.

Sex is not meaningless. Sex physically bonds individuals for a few moments to another–“two become one”. It can build genetic bonds and emotional bonds. Catholic teachings remind us that God made sex great–and something that great must be treated with respect.

 

[1ke]

Get the book Three to Get Married by Archbishop Fulton Sheen and read it cover to cover. then, give it to them to read.

Then start talking with your friend.