How do you find a spiritual director?

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Anniegirl

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I think that I’m at a time when I’m in need of spiritual direction. How do you go about finding a spiritual director? I live in a major city (New York) but I don’t really know any priests and I have no idea where to start. I’d appreciate any advice you might have. Thank you!
 
I am no expert in recommending direction, as most others are in this forum.

However, being in a blessed state of discernment, I guess you could call me an expert in “needing” direction

You don’t need to “know” a priest. If you belong to a parish just call the main office and ask for the first available appointment with the pastor or vicar. Either one should be able to point you in the right direction.

It’s quite easy to search, actually. It’s just a matter of making calls to the best prospective resources.

Most diocese have many resources. Call the vocation department at the diocese for a directory and start a local search.

Again, if you want to stay local try the pastor. But keep in mind….it doesn’t have to be a priest.

Many women religious are awesome. There are even some qualified and experienced lay people in your area too. Many belong to various orders with their respective charisms and spirituality.

You can call local abbeys or monasteries and ask if a director is on staff and available for appointments. Many retreat facilities have directors as well as other religious facilities. Some retired priests and even bishops can be located at local houses of discernment also.

I am deeply indebted to the service provided to me by the directors I’ve spoken to at several facilities I’ve visited within my diocese.

You will more than likely find them very receptive and understanding. Don’t feel awkward. It’s a calling and you are not an anomaly. Feel motivated to contact these places, not intimidated.

Depending on their availability, some may operate on a sliding scale to compensate for the time allotted. But many (usually your pastor) will help you as part of their ministry.

Don’t expect a magic bullet solution or immediate definitive answers. It’s a process and they aren’t in the business of rushing you.

Discern, pray, don’t despair, accumulate knowledge, try to calm the anxiety, and respond with grace.

Others may have better advice, but you seem to stuck in neutral for the moment and I just wanted to help and encourage you to make a move.

PS: Remember….there is no rule that states you have to wait until the end of you journey before enhancing your prayer life and fulfilling your apostolistic desires. Be cautious, but it’s okay to be proactive with the proper direction too.

Peace……
 
Anniegirl said:
I think that I’m at a time when I’m in need of spiritual direction. How do you go about finding a spiritual director? I live in a major city (New York) but I don’t really know any priests and I have no idea where to start. I’d appreciate any advice you might have. Thank you!
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If you are in NYC or in the suburbs you should not have too much of a problem. Contact the Jesuits, they are all trained in spiritual direction. There are several schools of spiritual direction in the area…one in fact sanctioned by the archdiocese. There are also several retreat houses in the NYC area that offer direction. You average parish priest is probably not the one to approcach for ongoing direction unless he has been specifically trained in that area, but he can give you recommendations. Also ask some sisters in the area for recommendations. Most of them are also under direction. I find the best thing is to get a recommendation and not just “pick from the phone book” so to speak.
 
Of course in order to contact Jesuits, or any other order for that matter, one must have the tools to do so. One of those tools actually is a directory from the vocation office at the diocese. It is quite helpful in narrowing the confusion and uncertainty that comes with trying to locate such places as retreat homes, schools of direction, and local religious including sisters and brothers. How could someone contact such resources without the knowledge and tools to do so? Especially if you don’t know where to start.

One must, of course, make initial contact with someone if one is to obtain a recommendation.

And a good place to start for someone who may not exactly be firmly connected with the diocese or, perhaps, not even the church, is in fact the local parish priest. If a parish priest is not qualified to provide spiritual direction they will usually provide someone with references or contacts. And occasionally, with their personal experience and some guidance from the Holy Spirit, they might just reference the directory to do so.

Also, in my personal experience I have found that communication and discretion have been very helpful. Trying to focus on what the Holy Spirit may be calling you to do can serve as a blessed tool, and as valuable information to any advisor, in regards to providing someone with a first step on their journey.

The journey can be quite confusing and sometimes a little intimidating. Where do you go? Who do you talk to? I’ve got to do something but I don’t know what? What if I make a mistake? How do I keep focused?

There are so many options out there for direction, yet with all of them just thrown out there as a grab-bag of resources, it gets a little tough to decipher. It’s such a beautiful journey, but sometimes a little tough on some of us. It’s just nice to have a little assurance in regards to potential opportunities.

I for one feel indebted to my parish priest for tolerating my initial emotional (and quite clumsy) proclamation of my state of discernment. He did point me on an initial path with a recommendation. I have now, with the help of God’s grace, been able to gain confidence with my current director and have been able to narrow the scope of my search.

It’s an enriching and blessed journey to be sure. I will pray for Anniegirl to share in that too.

Peace,
 
richardwy said:
“Hi Father. I’m Annie. I need spiritual direction. Can I start with you and see what shakes out?”

You know no Priests? No confessor?
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That doesn’t seem very appropriate.

I have just found one for me and he is excellent.
i love the Carmelite way so I joined the OCDS and I am pleased to say that we have a Carmelite priest here. So I asked him, and he said yes.
So, what form of prayer or you could do what I did and ask Jesus for a person to help me live the way He wants and from following His will I now have a Carmelite director.
Try it if you wish, and

Godbless
 
Simply call the archdiocese on NY and ask for a listing of retreat houses or places where you can receive spiritual direction. I know of St Ignatius on Park Ave (I think) and they offer spiritual direction.
 
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