How do you find the time?

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In the past week I’ve become very aware of my need to strengthen my relationship with Christ. I know it would make me a better wife and mother, something I desperately long for, because I rarely feel adequate in those roles. And I know having a closer relationship with God is what I’m made for, and I think working on that would help me be more fulfilled in my day-to-day grind.

But, with a full-time job, a nursing toddler who still isn’t sleeping through the night, basic chores of life (dishes, laundry, etc), and a husband, how do I find time?

I’ve attempted several types of devotionals made for busy people, and I just can’t seem to stick to it. Either I’m too tired to absorb anything useful or I feel like I’m always coming up with excuses. “Once my son is weaned, and I don’t have to pump”, “Once he sleeps through the night”, “When I’m caught up on housework”, “After I take a nap this weekend”. The list goes on and on. They’re all legitimate, because I can’t just force my son to stop nursing or to sleep through the night. I barely get enough laundry and dishes done to have clothes to wear and clean dishes to eat from. And I’m so tired when my son finally falls asleep around 9 that I can barely take a shower and crawl into bed before I fall asleep.

Right now I offer up ‘popcorn prayers’: “Lord help me through this day”; “Lord, let him go to sleep easily tonight”; “Lord, give me patience”. I also devoutly go to Mass every week, but even that has become less lately as I deal with various illnesses and utter exhaustion. That’s about all the time I get to spend with the Lord. So how do I cope? What do you do to spend more time with the Lord in your busy life?
 
Honey, if popcorn prayers are all you can manage, then God will accept that. Is there any way hubby can watch baby for a few minutes for you to unwind, or for you to go to Adoration at least once a week? Is there a church you can stop by on your way to work or for your lunch hour? After work? Even if it’s for 15 minutes. God bless you, you sure have your plate full!!
 
On a personal level, I have cut back on a number of time intensive activities that merit little in terms of overall fullfillment (e.g. watching TV). Also, leaving work on schedule, rather than staying a little longer to complete task has helped in recovering time. If you commute, trying giving thought to public transit, which allows to you spend some time to unwind and provide an opportunity to read devotionals. Scheduling your devotional time is a good way to ensure you make the needed time. I would negotiate something with your spouse to see if he can allow you 15 minutes of personal devotional time.

As for “popcorn” prayers, any devotion is certainly better than none. At a minimum, attending the mass is essential in being Catholic as well as a simple daily prayer to keep you motivated. The mass in not intended to be burden but a gift and should be treasured as such. Everyone knows that I’m not available during that time period and everything is scheduled around it. Any attempt to live the life of a Catholic Christian in outlook, action and thought I’m sure will be welcomed by God.
 
I would suggest getting the rosary or the Liturgy of the Hours (one of the lay versions) on CD and reciting it along with the CD while you are doing some household chore, such as dishes or folding laundry or driving to work. It’s perfectly all right to pray while doing other tasks if you are pressed for time. Or, take a rosary to bed with you and recite as many decades as you can before going to sleep. It’s said our Guardian Angel will finish whatever we can’t after we’ve gone to sleep.

Also be aware that all the things you do out of love for God and others, especially your family, are all prayer. Just say each morning: “I offer all my work, deeds, thoughts and words to thee most Blessed Holy Trinity.” With our modern busy lives we have to be a bit creative when it comes to making time for prayer. If you do any of these things I assure you God will see and in time you will find yourself listening more to hear his voice in your life. God bless you and yours. 🙂
 
On busy crazy days I will pray when I can. Doing the dishes “Lord, thank you for the ability to feed us”. When doing laundry “Dear Jesus, thank you for our home”. When I’m tired but can’t rest “Lord help me through this day”.

Do what you can, God knows you are busy, you aren’t hiding anything from Him. He knows. 🙂

~Liza
 
lizaanne said:
On busy crazy days I will pray when I can. Doing the dishes “Lord, thank you for the ability to feed us”. When doing laundry “Dear Jesus, thank you for our home”. When I’m tired but can’t rest “Lord help me through this day”.

Do what you can, God knows you are busy, you aren’t hiding anything from Him. He knows. 🙂

~Liza
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It’s not the length of the prayer - It’s the intent of the prayer 🙂

Actually, I did a homework assignment and found out I spend more time in prayers like this - than I did.

Of course, this type of prayer also augmented my regular devotions.
 
To me prayer is how we recharge our batteries to give us the spiritual strength (which is just as necessary as physical strength) to do our daily tasks. It’s a bit like recharging my mobile phone - it takes time and is occasionally inconvenient, but so very necessary, because without the power you can’t make the phone calls when you need to.

Who, no matter how inconvenient it is, would say ‘I don’t have time to recharge my phone right now, even though the battery is running out’? Someone who doesn’t care if the phone runs out of juice right when they need it most is who. It doesn’t make sense.

I find that when I make a little bit of time to pray without too many distractions, everything else gets done just that little bit quicker and easier. I’ve certainly never suffered by it.

Start with making a commitment to just ten minutes twice a day - get the husband to look after the kid if you have to, get out of the house and go somewhere quiet if need be. Start with a few deep relaxing breaths and a thought such as ‘Lord, thank you for being here with me, teach me how to pray.’ And really imagine Him standing in front of you and yourself talking to - and just as importantly LISTENING to - Him.

If your devotional doesn’t help it might be because it’s too passive a form of prayer. Does it involve simply reading? Try something a bit more active, where you have to concentrate on the prayer you’re saying. Maybe learn a new prayer - that way concentration is a given!
 
Praying while driving in the car is a great use of your time.
I pray the rosary (on a CD, in my car) a few times a week or listen to Gregorian Chant (and pray while listening).

Here is a review I did of a very popular Gregorian Chant CD:
stagesofprayer.wordpress.com/2010/03/03/music-review-chant/

It have been many years since I had to bottle feed my sons, but you might have time for a Divine Mercy Chaplet while feeding them. Even if you don’t finish the chaplet, 80% is better than nothing.
 
Any time you’re doing something that leaves your mind free (like dishes, nursing in the middle of the night, etc.) you can talk to God. Imagine that He’s right there with you. He is! Tell Him you love Him, you’re doing this for Him, thank and adore Him. Use ejaculations like ‘Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place my trust in Thee’. Whatever you do for your family you can offer to Him as a prayer. Make many ‘spiritual communions’ during the day.
 
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