How do you get a dispensation to miss Mass?

[Secant]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and should avoid attending Mass due to complications (assuming the baby doesn’t come first anyway). After the baby is born, I will still be unable to attend for a few more weeks. With my first child, I missed one Mass when I was in the hospital directly after the birth and felt horribly guilty. I went back to Mass too soon and had some complications that I’d like to avoid. Therefore, this time, I’d like to get a dispensation beforehand. Can my pastor give that to me? Do I need to contact the bishop? Do I need a face to face meeting with whomever can grant that dispensation, a note from the doc, or anything special? It would be difficult and not recommended for me to go to Mass this weekend, but not impossible, so I’m wondering how to get a dispensation, because I know that needless missing of Mass is gravely sinful.

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

In your situation I don’t think you need a dispensation since illness and caring for infants are already considered reasons to miss Mass. However, to be sure, you can talk with your pastor; he’s the one authorized to give a dispensation.

From the Catechism: 2181 The Sunday Eucharist is the foundation and confirmation of all Christian practice. For this reason the faithful are obliged to participate in the Eucharist on days of obligation, unless excused for a serious reason (for example, illness, the care of infants) or dispensed by their own pastor.119 Those who deliberately fail in this obligation commit a grave sin.

 

[babochka]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and should avoid attending Mass due to complications (assuming the baby doesn’t come first anyway). After the baby is born, I will still be unable to attend for a few more weeks. With my first child, I missed one Mass when I was in the hospital directly after the birth and felt horribly guilty. I went back to Mass too soon and had some complications that I’d like to avoid. Therefore, this time, I’d like to get a dispensation beforehand. Can my pastor give that to me? Do I need to contact the bishop? Do I need a face to face meeting with whomever can grant that dispensation, a note from the doc, or anything special? It would be difficult and not recommended for me to go to Mass this weekend, but not impossible, so I’m wondering how to get a dispensation, because I know that needless missing of Mass is gravely sinful.

Your own pastor (not just any priest) can give you a dispensation from your obligation to attend Mass.

You don’t need a dispensation to miss Mass under these circumstances, however. You are not obligated to attend Mass if your health would be adversely affected, or if you are caring for an infant, recovering from childbirth, etc. It doesn’t have to be impossible for your to get to Mass in order to be excused from your obligation and it within your ability to decide if these circumstances warrant staying home. It sounds to me like you should stay home, but you’re the best judge of that, perhaps in consultation with your husband, confessor, or doctor, if you’re unsure.

A dispensation is only for when you are obligated to attend, but have a conflict for a particular reason.

 

[1ke]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and should avoid attending Mass due to complications (assuming the baby doesn’t come first anyway). After the baby is born, I will still be unable to attend for a few more weeks. With my first child, I missed one Mass when I was in the hospital directly after the birth and felt horribly guilty. I went back to Mass too soon and had some complications that I’d like to avoid. Therefore, this time, I’d like to get a dispensation beforehand. Can my pastor give that to me? Do I need to contact the bishop? Do I need a face to face meeting with whomever can grant that dispensation, a note from the doc, or anything special? It would be difficult and not recommended for me to go to Mass this weekend, but not impossible, so I’m wondering how to get a dispensation, because I know that needless missing of Mass is gravely sinful.

Do you tend toward scruples?

You do not need a dispensation. You do not have an obligation when your own health or care of your infant prevent you from attending.

You have absolutely no reason to feel guilty, and the fact that you put your health in jeopardy and felt “horribly guilty” for missing mass *while you were in the hospital *directly after child birth is an indication that something is askew here.

 

[robertmidwest]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and should avoid attending Mass due to complications (assuming the baby doesn’t come first anyway). After the baby is born, I will still be unable to attend for a few more weeks. With my first child, I missed one Mass when I was in the hospital directly after the birth and felt horribly guilty. I went back to Mass too soon and had some complications that I’d like to avoid. Therefore, this time, I’d like to get a dispensation beforehand. Can my pastor give that to me? Do I need to contact the bishop? Do I need a face to face meeting with whomever can grant that dispensation, a note from the doc, or anything special? It would be difficult and not recommended for me to go to Mass this weekend, but not impossible, so I’m wondering how to get a dispensation, because I know that needless missing of Mass is gravely sinful.

Several weeks down the road, when things have settled down for you, talk to your pastor about your scrupulosity.

Until then take the time you need to take of yourself and the new baby without feeling guilty. You a real medical need.

 

[godisgood77]

I am 38 weeks pregnant and should avoid attending Mass due to complications (assuming the baby doesn’t come first anyway). After the baby is born, I will still be unable to attend for a few more weeks. With my first child, I missed one Mass when I was in the hospital directly after the birth and felt horribly guilty. I went back to Mass too soon and had some complications that I’d like to avoid. Therefore, this time, I’d like to get a dispensation beforehand. Can my pastor give that to me? Do I need to contact the bishop? Do I need a face to face meeting with whomever can grant that dispensation, a note from the doc, or anything special? It would be difficult and not recommended for me to go to Mass this weekend, but not impossible, so I’m wondering how to get a dispensation, because I know that needless missing of Mass is gravely sinful.

Bless your heart… Simply discern your situation and if you are unable to attend, that is okay. It sounds like your health and baby’s health easily qualify as a just reason.

 

[Dirk_Skene]

If everything you say is true, and I have no reason to doubt you, you’ve already got your dispensation.

 

[sirach2v4]

I suffer from a specific type of post-traumatic stress syndrome, and I am averse to noise or distractions. I drive without the radio on, usually, even on long trips. I “mute” the TV and FF during the commercials if I’m watching program, and…it really bothers me when people are talking in church – not praying, just talking.

around here in all the parishes I know, there is talking – out loud – before Mass, after Mass, and during Mass (the ushers always seem to have some other agenda going on there in the back of the church).

Now, to be sure, look-up canons 1205 through 1210 that are usually interpreted and applied as requiring silence in Church.

But, these distract me so much to a level that I may as well not be in church. The last time I was in church, saying my rosary, a lady came into the same pew, but about 10 feet away, and she was talking out loud with a woman who was no more than 18 inches away from her. I stopped her after Mass and informed her about Canon 1210 with regard to her talking out loud in church.

I have tried unsuccessfully to get the pastor (a canon lawyer) to even bring up the subject, say, in the bulletin. I wrote the bishop, asking for a dispensation from Mass, and he wouldn’t give me a dispensation, mentioning that I needed the Eucharist. but, he said that if I didn’t attend Mass, I didn’t have to confess it.

One of the two churches in my parish has a rosary devotion on a weekday. I went a couple times, and the people are talking continuously until the leader starts the prayer. When the rosary prayers are over, the talking begins immediately. My aunt showed up one of these times, and I asked her about all the talking. She told me it was “fellowship” and so permitted, in her mind.

By the way, anybody can have PTSD, it’s not just a trauma of war, where some soldiers are afflicted with it. Anybody of any age can develop PTSD. The convicted murderess Jody Arias was said to have this problem like I have. It was during her trial that I found out it had a name, but now I can’t remember it. It’s hyper- (something) aha, “hyper vigilance” I know exactly how I developed this. Many decades ago, when I was in high school, I came home with serious homework to do. But, my mother liked to play the tv loudly, which drove me nuts when I was trying to study. She said that she wanted to be able to hear the tv anyplace in the house, so that she wouldn’t miss anything. That meant that there was no place for me to escape the noise and distraction.

It’s not “just me.” There are people talking out loud in the local adoration chapel. Canon 1210 is just a rug that a lot of people wipe their shoes on.

**Can. 1210 In a sacred place only those things are to be permitted which serve to exercise or promote worship, piety and religion. Anything out of harmony with the holiness of the place is forbidden. **