How do you stay positive?

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crenfro said:
Hello.

I have depression so I’m not sure what to say here. I do know that trying to be kind at all times and acting like a Christian ought to act, no matter what, can go a long way.

It is also good to be genuine and honest.
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I think you are doing the right things, when you help others, you also help yourself.
 
The Old Colonel does it by setting only reasonable goals. Then I, when in my utter magnificence over-achieve, bask in my own glory. Hoorah! 😎
 
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I read this in an explanation of the melancholic temperament.

"[Ask yourself] In the scope of things, how bad is this?

Cultivate virtue of optimism. Seek positive aspects in every situation, including difficult ones. Trusted surrender to Divine Providence will give peace and joy.

Express appreciation for others - overtly and consciously to extend kindness toward others and express sincere gratitude and appreciation for all those in my life. See Christ in everyone."

It’s hard to do when one’s disposition is towards seriousness and intovertedness that describes the melancholic disposition. We weren’t born with the joyous/optimistic attitude of the Sanguine disposition, or the tranquility of the Phlegmatic disposition.

Just keep trying to adjust your thinking; steer clear of negative thoughts and try to focus on positive thoughts.
 
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There are some popular, helpful, useful books that people have traditionally enjoyed.

For example:

Norman Vincent Peale: Three Complete Books: The Power of Positive Thinking; The Positive Principle Today; Enthusiasm Makes the Difference Hardcover – September 21, 1992
by Norman Vincent Peale (Author)

https://www.amazon.com/Norman-Vincent-Peale-Enthusiasm-Difference/dp/0517084724

The Power of Positive Thinking Paperback – March 12, 2003
by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale (Author)

https://www.amazon.com/Power-Positi...rd_wg=CiFlK&psc=1&refRID=637WJWTVX97KJE16J89W

https://www.amazon.com/You-Can-If-T...rd_wg=0daQk&psc=1&refRID=MV1BT0FG01Z63H7SH2C1
 
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Jordan Peterson is very helpful as well:


click here google youtube peterson:
 
I listened to a great podcast “On Being w/ guest star David Steindl-Rast” he talks about Anatomy of Gratitude. It really helps me day by day finding the joy in every moment. Staying positive can feel phony if you don’t have a reason to be. David talks about how we shouldn’t necessarily be grateful for everything that happens; war, famine, death etc… but that we can find gratitude in every moment. It’s a free podcast, there’s apps on the store you can download it for offline use. David Steindl-Rast — How to Be Grateful in Every Moment (But Not for Everything) | The On Being Project - The On Being Project
 
It mainly comes from faith. As bad as the world can be, and as untrustworthy and undependable as people sometimes are, belief in God means that He’s ultimately in control and goodness and love and order still reside at the very foundations of the universe.
 
I have a similar personality. I’m draw toward looking for problems and solving them. But I try to be hopeful rather than just positive. Can be a challenge.
I stay positive through prayer and fasting. The more of each I do the more forward looking I can be.
 
Gratitude for the small things, and knowing that Jesus conquered death.
 
It is easier to be positive when helping others. I need a distraction
 
I met a man who had been homeless for about five years, he carried his home in two bags. He said, every night when I find somewhere to sleep, I reflect on my day and find several things to thank God for.
 
I know firsthand that it’s a struggle on a daily basis. I put up little notes that I can see readily all around the house because it’s not my nature to be joyful and happy.

These notes constantly remind me to put things in proper perspective and not sweat all the small stuff; to let go of unforgiveness when I’m on the receiving end bcz I’ve hurt others in the past and would want forgiveness; to see my faults instead of only seeing others’ faults; to know I can’t change others when I can’t even change my own faults; to count my blessings daily; to see inconveniences as opportunities to grow in virtue.

All these things are against my very nature and at times these reminders can “hurt”, but I must plow through. Only I can choose to be happy – despite what life throws my way.

I have made very small changes and have a long way to go. Just one step at a time, but I know my struggles to improve are pleasing to God.
 
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What’s more real than this: “Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?” 🙂

It’s the illusions and false hopes that trouble people the most, in my opinion.
 
Yes, each temperament has their weaknesses as well as their strengths; their own vices and virtues.

The melancholic temperament is known to be “deeper” and more complex than the other 3. I choose to take that as a compliment. 😉
 
Both positivity and negativity can be toxic. Just give yourself permission to feel how you feel, it’s okay. If you find that you feel negative a lot and want to change that, don’t force the feeling, look for the behavioral or environmental root of the feeling and work on that instead.
 
BoyGenius said:
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Jump4Joy:
Positivity can feel phony. I feel the most comfortable being negative at least there are no surprises. Trusting people can be difficult. Everyone is different and has different values, morals, biases, prejudices.
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People tend to use being positive to control how you behave. When someone says, “Don’t be so negative.” Or, “no negative thoughts here.”

But if that’s the case, then people would ignore impoverishment, and do nothing to help the poor. Thus, do I find the language of positive/negative to be uncharitable. I get it, though, people want to keep their sense/wits/sanity about themselves. So not to fall into being depressed or some unhealthy/disordered view. What could be referred as negative (i.e. taking away from something good.) Which is understood, in that way. However, if someone cannot come to you with their wounds, hurt, and pain. Because you have simply told them to feel no hurt or pain, and seek assistance in saying so. In other words, the tendency of the positive/negative language/view/respect of culture tends to slide into the direction of selfishness. Not seeing the damage/hurt/wounds of the world.

Interesting, this comes from new age alignments of thinking/though that merit their idea’s from the East/Orient traditions. In fact, the parents of the Nepalian prince, kept rotting fruit, the sick, and dying from their son.

I do not like the language surrounding being positive. It is a mis-use and distortion of language. Negative means absence of what should be there. We say -15 degree Fahrenheit. To mean below freezing, negative. Or when you are in debt, and owe money. Negative has a profitable purpose. For even Jesus was being taken away through death. Through the nails on the Cross. Many would say that is really negative.

He would not let us slide into the absence/negative encounter with sin. But to be a light/a positive to the world: the means of Salvation. Not ignoring the pain and hurt of the world. But to long endure it for the Salvation of souls. Thus Jesus is the unconquered light. He conquered death. And love triumphed, in the end.

Ignoring what is evil, just to be positive does nothing. And so, in that way, in that view of the word “positive” is really a negative, masquerading as a positive. When it isn’t Anyone who thinks it’s a positive to ignore the evils, just to make one’s self feel good. Are doing nothing to fight the absence caused by the darkness of sin.
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I think people misunderstand what positivity means. See, the doing something about poverty in your example IS you being positive.

True negativity would be 'yes there’s poverty and no point even trying to do anything about it" or worse, ‘I’m not poor myself, and people who are probably deserve it for some fault of theirs, so no point even treating them with common courtesy or decency’.

Yes some people have the attitude you describe, but imho there is so much recognition of inequality and injustice and so many charitable and other efforts to remedy it - probably as much now as ever. A lot of it is on a micro level though.
 
St. Paul says to give thanks to God for everything. And that means everything. Try it and it will change your life.
 
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