How far away would you move......with kids.?

[shannyk]

Would you move out of the country? To a country with a totally different culture, language, climate, et al?

I have been asked to move for work, and don’t know if it’s something that is just too monumental to consider. It would be for a period of 2 years, so it’s not ‘open ended’ I know we will come home at some point, and it does seem like an interesting opportunity for us, but…I just don’t KNOW!!!

Anyone ever done this? Advice welcome!

 

[Phemie]

As long as the entire family was moving together I’d move anywhere in the world. Strange language? We’ll learn. Strange school? Broadening experience for the children. We would have jumped at the chance.

 

[agnostic]

Travel - the greatest leveller and educator of all If you can all work it out - I say go for it

 

[KarenElissa]

Would you move out of the country? To a country with a totally different culture, language, climate, et al?

I have been asked to move for work, and don’t know if it’s something that is just too monumental to consider. It would be for a period of 2 years, so it’s not ‘open ended’ I know we will come home at some point, and it does seem like an interesting opportunity for us, but…I just don’t KNOW!!!

Anyone ever done this? Advice welcome!

Here is a blog from a lady who moved to China. She and her husband have a son and one on the way. I’m not sure how long they’ve been there as I only recently started reading it.

 

[monicatholic]

Shannyk,

for two years:
if we could manage a way to hold onto our house,
if we could homeschool in that country
if we could be near a Catholic Church,

i would prayerfully consider going.

where are they asking you to move to?

 

[shannyk]

Here is a blog from a lady who moved to China. She and her husband have a son and one on the way. I’m not sure how long they’ve been there as I only recently started reading it.

Karen that is my all time fav blog

I do take inspiration from them too. One big difference, she has hubby with her. I’m a single mom and would be working FT, about 1/2 the time from home, with 3 kiddos, one with special needs. I don’t have much help at all now working FT from home but in a pinch there is someone I can call if I need to. I’m not sure how that would go over there…

 

[shannyk]

Shannyk,

for two years:
if we could manage a way to hold onto our house,
if we could homeschool in that country
if we could be near a Catholic Church,

i would prayerfully consider going.

where are they asking you to move to?

monica good things to consider and I could do all of the above, actually the kids would have a tutor at home as I will be working FT, but I would of course try to sneak some of the schooling in myself…And there is a Church…but that has to be more looked in to.

Kuala Lumpur Malaysia

 

[monicatholic]

shannyk,

a few questions present themselves:

can you take a young adult with you as a nanny-- a local catholic college student who would love to study in malaysia for a couple of years?

i read that it’s a big city, but not a huge one-- 1.6 million people. english is a compulsory school language. lots of arts. a certain western influence, though Christianity seems small minority.

what special services does your child need?

how much support will your company give you in securing all your needs-- tutor, comfortable home, special needs services, child care?

does your company have other americans employed there? can you contact some of them?

do you have property here? what will you do with it? where will you live when you come back?

are you responsible, or precariously close to being responsible for aging parents?

 

[os_justi]

Absolutely! Think about what a wonderful opportunity for your children to learn about another culture FROM that other culture, to be able to learn another language and about different foods and another country’s history. What better way to teach them how to be accepting of others than to live among them? Most people never have the chance to visit overseas, and you have the chance to live there. Go for it, and give thanks that you have been given this opportunity!

 

[Teakafrog]

Kuala Lumpur Malaysia

I had a cousin who lived there for several years for work. No kids, though, and definitely not Catholic, so I’m not sure what kind of comparison there would be. She enjoyed it.

 

[Gearoidin]

Karen that is my all time fav blog

I do take inspiration from them too. One big difference, she has hubby with her. I’m a single mom and would be working FT, about 1/2 the time from home, with 3 kiddos, one with special needs. I don’t have much help at all now working FT from home but in a pinch there is someone I can call if I need to. I’m not sure how that would go over there…

I was going to say “yes” until I read this post. Now I would say that it depends on the support you can get to help with the children and how old your children are. Also what kind of special needs?
However, living in another country and very different culture is a wondeful experience for all of you. Your children can learn a different language, get a good understanding of communication across cultures, learn more about themselves and their own culture too. Since this is only for 2 years and if you can get support for your family then I’d go.

Don’t forget that are international schools too and many companies that send families abroad will pay for it. Most are very good.

There is an excellent book called “Third Culture Kids” by David C. Pollock , Ruth E. Van Reken ISBN 978-1857882957 you can get it on Amazon.

Also some excellent website that describe the experience of spending part or all your chidlhood ourside your parent’s culture:

tckworld.com/

tckid.com/

Gearoidin

 

[whatevergirl]

Would you move out of the country? To a country with a totally different culture, language, climate, et al?

I have been asked to move for work, and don’t know if it’s something that is just too monumental to consider. It would be for a period of 2 years, so it’s not ‘open ended’ I know we will come home at some point, and it does seem like an interesting opportunity for us, but…I just don’t KNOW!!!

Anyone ever done this? Advice welcome!

Yes, we would move out of the country. Our kids have always wanted to live either in Italy or Japan, so if my or my husband’s company (both global) wanted to relocate us, or we went for jobs in those locations–my kids said they would be all for it.

I know it must be scary to consider such a move. I can say it with ease right now, because my dh and I are not faced with it though!

I will keep you in my prayers that God gives you a sign to help you make the right decision. In a way–it sounds so exciting, but I can understand your hesitancy.

 

[magic_stick]

Would you move out of the country? To a country with a totally different culture, language, climate, et al?

I have been asked to move for work, and don’t know if it’s something that is just too monumental to consider. It would be for a period of 2 years, so it’s not ‘open ended’ I know we will come home at some point, and it does seem like an interesting opportunity for us, but…I just don’t KNOW!!!

Anyone ever done this? Advice welcome!

In your situation, it depends on where it is. How the kids would relate with a different language? Do they understand it? I would depend on a lot. If I had no kids I would do it. And tha’ts only if I understood the language and also since it’s temporary. Well, maybe if it was a year. I don’t know about 2 years. Hard decision though. good luck!

 

[gettingthere]

It would depend on a few things. One being if it brought us closer to family (we live 4,000 miles from my family currently). A second would depend on the ages of my children and when. I wouldn’t make my kids start over in junior high or high school, and I wouldn’t make them move in the middle of the school year.

That said, sometimes you can’t help it when you have to move. I’d like to be settled and raise my kids in the same general area for their whole childhood, but sometimes moving is unavoidable.

 

[KarenElissa]

Karen that is my all time fav blog

I do take inspiration from them too. One big difference, she has hubby with her. I’m a single mom and would be working FT, about 1/2 the time from home, with 3 kiddos, one with special needs. I don’t have much help at all now working FT from home but in a pinch there is someone I can call if I need to. I’m not sure how that would go over there…

:yup: Ya, I’m really enjoying it!

Ya, you are in a bit of a different situation, I’m sure that makes it harder. I would try and make it happen, but I’m big on traveling! (You can take me too! ) I think it would be a valuable experience.

 

[KCT]

How old are your kids? If I had little kids and not much help, I’d think twice. If the kids are older and could benefit from the experience, I’d consider it.

 

[Just_wondering]

My grandparents raised my father in Kuala Lumpur as an expat family. This was, of course, 60 years ago. However, from what I know of Malaysia, it’s quite common and inexpensive to hire a nanny to look after the children while you work. Of course, a special needs child might require more care than a local nanny would be able to offer. However, I’ve heard many Malaysians speak English very well, so it won’t be as difficult as other countries are.

There are also lots of international schools there. They have a large expat community, and if your children would attend schools in the area, they’d be going to school with kids from a variety of different cultures.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

**For me, personally, no. But I have always lived in the same city…the same part of the same city to be exact. I live only 5 minutes away from where we lived when I was born and now live only a few minutes away from my parents (who live in the same house I grew up in for most of my life) and my sister and her husband. I really value “sameness” and being close to family. But that is just MY personality.

What do you WANT to do? Sounds like it is very interesting/exciting to you but the fears are giving you some reservations… how old are your little ones?**

 

[shannyk]

A day later and I still am not sure what to do.

I have to admit this is a very enticing offer for ME, but I’m thinking not necessarily so for the kids. We as a family have had a lot of changes in the past several years; the sudden death of my husband, then moving out of state, only to move again a year later…and we JUST not a month ago, moved into this new house we have been waiting a year to be done renovating. Then just a couple of weeks ago, the announcement from my daughters parochial school that they can’t give me the financial aid they promised back in April, which means DD has to switch schools AGAIN. The poor girl has been through SO many changes, I don’t know if she can take any more though I’m sure she would say she could.

There is also the BIG issue of my special needs son whom I mentioned before, severe autism and MR along with ADHD, who has major issues with transitioning. The kids are ages 10, 9 and 4, and the four year old is the least of my worries when it comes to this move. She’s a fish in water anywhere we go seemingly.

I work for a provider of intensive autism therapy as the health coordinator. Some families from WI have moved to Malaysia and want to continue services there, and they have piqued the interest of people there and now there is a small waiting list for services, about 6 families. There are just 2 line therapists there now running the show, and they want to send me and 4 other women over to expand the program. I would fill the same position there, and add some duties as well. I’d work from home about half the time, and the Co. would provide a FT one on one therapist/caregiver for my son, and a tutor for the other two. The oldest would go to school there as well. They will pay for my moving expenses, and help rent my house and sell my car. They will pay my rent there in KL, and I will have a stipend for other expenses, which will not cover our needs by any means, but it will help. I’ll be getting a raise as well.

There is not a huge Catholic presence in Malaysia, which worries me…butt he parishes seem to pretty active, if small. I’ve emailed the archdiocese with some questions, and look forward to what they have to say.

I dunno, I just don’t know if this is something TOO big and too much of yet another change for us. I’m leaning toward staying here, but I’m not sure…

 

[nodito]

I’m in my mid-twenties now, but growing up we moved a couple dozen times, usually out of the country. We lived in Japan for 4 years, France for 2 years, China for 2 years, and my parents just moved back to Japan.

I feel that the experience my parents gave me by traveling to different countries was invaluable. I have great stories, great pictures, and great friends from around the world. It has helped me develop a greater appreciation for people who look and act different than I do. Perhaps most importantly, it has solidified my love for the Catholic Church. No matter where we’ve lived, I’ve always been able to attend Catholic mass and receive confession. I am so grateful that this universal Church exists and has maintained a sense of “home” for me, regardless of the continent I’m on.

Pray about your decision in front of the Eucharist and then decide in peace.

Blessings.