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sunflower314
Guest
How long does the church recommend that a couple is together until they can be married in the Catholic Church?
(Being together meaning dating/engaged)
(Being together meaning dating/engaged)
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How long does the church recommend a couple wait until married?
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RolandThompsonGunner
Guest
I’ve never heard of a specific timeline. Probably going to vary a lot from couple to couple based on their specific circumstances.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
The Church doesn’t recommend a timeline. However, here in the USA you’re generally expected to start making arrangements for a Church wedding 6 months to a year in advance, and use that time to reserve a wedding date and go through pre-Cana preparation and any other administrative stuff you need to do. Therefore, from a practical standpoint, you’re expected to have been “together” for at least 6 months to a year, and that would assume you got engaged almost immediately after you started dating, which isn’t going to happen for most people.
I am sure there are some cases where a priest could accelerate the timeline a bit if there’s some compelling reason to do so, such as one of the couple is shipping out with the military, or one of the couple is seriously ill and might be terminal, etc, but it’s not the norm. I also suspect one reason they require the 6 months to a year is to prevent people from getting married too quickly and breaking up as a result.
I am sure there are some cases where a priest could accelerate the timeline a bit if there’s some compelling reason to do so, such as one of the couple is shipping out with the military, or one of the couple is seriously ill and might be terminal, etc, but it’s not the norm. I also suspect one reason they require the 6 months to a year is to prevent people from getting married too quickly and breaking up as a result.
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VeryBlessed
Guest
This isn’t from the church, it’s just from me. If somebody is in an all fired up hurry to get married, beware. Time after time, I’ve seen that the person in a hurry is hiding serious character flaws.
If love is real, it will be real in a year. But if it’s not real, you will regret the hurry. Marry in haste, repent at leisure, my mother used to say.
If love is real, it will be real in a year. But if it’s not real, you will regret the hurry. Marry in haste, repent at leisure, my mother used to say.
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Weserthy
Guest
I knew one couple who were married in the Church that were together for less than a year before they got engaged, though they had known each other for a long time before that (they’ve long since been divorced, a couple of years into their marriage, go figure).
As for how long they’ll make you wait to get married and schedule a wedding, I’ve never seen a parish that allows you to do it more quickly than 6 months, some make you wait up to a year. So I guess that’s the minimum by default.
As for how long they’ll make you wait to get married and schedule a wedding, I’ve never seen a parish that allows you to do it more quickly than 6 months, some make you wait up to a year. So I guess that’s the minimum by default.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
My parents were engaged a couple months after they met for the first time, and married within the year. Dad had to convert to Catholicism first before they got married so he fit that in there too. They stayed happily married for almost 30 years when Dad died. Mom never dated anyone else though men liked her. She didn’t want anybody else.I knew one couple who were married in the Church that were together for less than a year before they got engaged, though they had known each other for a long time before that (they’ve long since been divorced, a couple of years into their marriage, go figure).
Some people, it just works like that. It would scare the heck out of me to get engaged to someone I only knew for a few months. Mom did gather lots of information about him from his workmates and some mutual friends because she was sure a guy like him who was in his late 30s and not Catholic would have a wife or an ex-wife somewhere. Nope.
I always said I would not get engaged to someone unless I had been dating them for at least 10 years and that’s exactly what happened. 10 years almost exactly.
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InThePew
Guest
The question is the couple’s readiness for marriage which includes their undertaking of a pre-marriage education programme. Officially at least, a priest can’t actually refuse to marry a couple (although I know some who will) provided of course they’re free to marry but he would however strongly counsel a couple to wait if he felt that they were rushing into it or hadn’t given sufficient thought to the commitment they were making.
In danger of death of course, the usual rules go out the window.
In danger of death of course, the usual rules go out the window.
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tuffsmurf
Guest
Saints Louis and Zélie Martin got married 3 months after their first meeting. By husband and I married after about 8 months.
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maryjk
Guest
I’ve never seen a timeline given by the Church.
Although I wasn’t practicing my faith, I met my husband and moved in with him after just three months of dating. We were married 2 years later and have been married for 28 years.
There was no hurry up and rush because someone was hiding something. Sometimes, people just know.
Although I wasn’t practicing my faith, I met my husband and moved in with him after just three months of dating. We were married 2 years later and have been married for 28 years.
There was no hurry up and rush because someone was hiding something. Sometimes, people just know.
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