How should I handle converting?

  • Thread starter Thread starter EmilyK856
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
E

EmilyK856

Guest
I’ve been wondering on how to handle this situation.
I am currently 15, and my family attends a Methodist Church. I’ve been thinking off and on about Catholicism for several years but dismissed it because of things like purgatory and the Marian doctrines.
About a month ago, I went to a Catholic retreat with one of my best friends, and I was blown away at how focused it was on Jesus.
Since then, I’ve been pretty set on converting to the Catholic faith.
My mom isn’t unsupportive of me, but she’s understandably not thrilled either. It doesn’t look like I will be able to convert at least until I can drive and have a car, if not till I’m 18 and away at school.
Most of my mom’s issue is more that church is supposed to be a family event.
It may be relevant information that I also sing in the praise band.
My questions are
  1. Should I just quietly stick out these last few years at our church till I am old, or push more for it when I can drive myself around?
  2. Ive heard that Catholics should not accept communion at a protestant church because it doesnt have the real presence. Should I not accept communion at our church then because I accept the real presence even though I’m not a Catholic, pr would it be better to just accept it so as not to make a fuss?
    3.Is it deceitful for me to continue singing in the praise band if I am not intending on staying in the Methodist church, and have rejected many of its core beliefs because they dont make sense?
    Thank you for your time.
 
I am not sure what core beliefs of the Methodist church do not make sense to you, but you are still praising Jesus singing in the praise band.
Do you have a Catholic friend that would take you along to Mass?
We have an RCIA program at the Catholic church for those to attend who are thinking about converting. They generally start in the fall and then if you decide you want to become Catholic you would be received into the Catholic church Easter of 2016.
Since you aren’t Catholic yet and haven’t decided for sure if you will pursue it now or later I don’t know that it is wrong to take communion at the Methodist church as long as you are still attending with your family. I don’t know if you are able to watch EWTN on tv or not, but I would suggest trying to watch that and look at the library or online about what Catholics believe. Becoming Catholic does not happen overnight. There is a lot to learn as Catholicism has a long history as opposed to a Protestant religion.
I would recommend calling your local Catholic church and begin inquiring.
 
Being only 15, you will not be able to join the RCIA classes. They are for adults.
You CAN however, start attending the teen catechesis classes with your parents permission at the Catholic church. There may be a fee for their youth groups, and they would be delighted to have you join any choirs they have.
You really need to see if your parents have an issue with you attending church at the Catholic church. If they do, as their child, you should respect their wishes and continue in your church. When you turn 18, you can make a decision to convert on your own, without their permission, but hopefully, with their blessing.
Ask your friend to get you a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (the green one) and read up and become familiar with what the Church teaches on various subjects. Go to Mass with her when you can, and be the best person you can be in your faith…obedient both to God and your parents. Since you are not Catholic yet, you are not bound by the rule to not take communion in your church. If you feel it is pointless, that is another matter. I would caution you to defy your parents however.
It’s great that you have a friend that is introducing you to the faith. God bless her.
 
This is really a matter of prudential judgment. I know from experience that the UMC contains a wide variety of beliefs, some terrible and some very traditional.

It is generally no sin for you to attend Methodist church with your family or to sing there. If you come to believe in Catholic Communion, you should stop taking the Methodist communion. There is certainly no reason to be disrespectful of your family’s beliefs.

Is it possible for you to attend a Catholic Mass or RCIA class? If not, you may have to wait until you can drive yourself.
 
Hi,
I’m glad you went on the retreat with your friend. I’m going to try to answer your questions but you’ll probably get better info from a local parish.
  1. I’m not sure when you should convert, maybe try inviting your family to go to mass with you and your friends family would help (If you haven’t been to mass before it may be slightly confusing for you and your family). Another option would be to email a priest from your area and ask him the questions you have about Catholicism and what he thinks would be the best way to live a Catholic lifestyle within your family (for example when would be the best time to enter the church).
  2. If you disagree with what your church teaches about communion then I would not recommend taking communion at your church. To do so would be saying you agree to the teachings by your actions while not agreeing with your heart.
  3. I’m not sure about staying in the praise band. On one hand singing praise to God can never be a bad thing as long as it is a song that does not go against His truth but at the same time you’re being a leader in something you don’t necessarily agree with.
Like I said earlier, emailing a nearby priest would be a good step. He is likely to have much better answers than I do.

I’m praying for you,
Dancer1409
 
EmilyK856 said:
I’ve been wondering on how to handle this situation.
I am currently 15, and my family attends a Methodist Church. I’ve been thinking off and on about Catholicism for several years but dismissed it because of things like purgatory and the Marian doctrines.
About a month ago, I went to a Catholic retreat with one of my best friends, and I was blown away at how focused it was on Jesus.
Since then, I’ve been pretty set on converting to the Catholic faith.
My mom isn’t unsupportive of me, but she’s understandably not thrilled either. It doesn’t look like I will be able to convert at least until I can drive and have a car, if not till I’m 18 and away at school.
Most of my mom’s issue is more that church is supposed to be a family event.
It may be relevant information that I also sing in the praise band.
My questions are
  1. Should I just quietly stick out these last few years at our church till I am old, or push more for it when I can drive myself around?
  2. Ive heard that Catholics should not accept communion at a protestant church because it doesnt have the real presence. Should I not accept communion at our church then because I accept the real presence even though I’m not a Catholic, pr would it be better to just accept it so as not to make a fuss?
    3.Is it deceitful for me to continue singing in the praise band if I am not intending on staying in the Methodist church, and have rejected many of its core beliefs because they dont make sense?
    Thank you for your time.
Click to expand...
When you are old enough to drive, you can bring up converting to the Church again with your Mom. Hopefully, she will be more willing to let you do it; if not, then you will have to wait until you turn 18. Receiving communion in your church right now is up to you. Catholics do have closed communion and are not allow to receive in the Methodist Church, however, you are not Catholic yet and are not bound by that rule, so if you still want to receive in your present church, it’s ok. If you want to keep on singing in the praise band, go ahead. The piano player in the choir at my parish is not Catholic, we don’t care and really enjoy his musical talent!
 
pianistclare said:
Being only 15, you will not be able to join the RCIA classes. They are for adults.
You CAN however, start attending the teen catechesis classes with your parents permission at the Catholic church. There may be a fee for their youth groups, and they would be delighted to have you join any choirs they have.
You really need to see if your parents have an issue with you attending church at the Catholic church. If they do, as their child, you should respect their wishes and continue in your church. When you turn 18, you can make a decision to convert on your own, without their permission, but hopefully, with their blessing.
Ask your friend to get you a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (the green one) and read up and become familiar with what the Church teaches on various subjects. Go to Mass with her when you can, and be the best person you can be in your faith…obedient both to God and your parents. Since you are not Catholic yet, you are not bound by the rule to not take communion in your church. If you feel it is pointless, that is another matter. I would caution you to defy your parents however.
It’s great that you have a friend that is introducing you to the faith. God bless her.
Click to expand...
 
I may be wrong ,but I know of a person who did become a Catholic at a fairly young age, entered a well known religious order at 16 and is there today. I assume she had parental permission. Her family converted after she became a Sister. Correct me if I am wrong.
 
Woo-eee, that’s a tough one, but it is also probably more common than you think. Frankly, you really ought to get in touch with a local priest to chart out the best course of action going forward. He can help you navigate your obligations to your parents, your family’s church, and, ultimately, your conscience and Catholic faith.

I suppose that it might, in part, depend on just how opposed your parents are to it all. If your mom is fine with you attending a Catholic parish for Sunday Mass as long as you are able to also attend the family’s Methodist church, then why not do that? You can convert, attend Sunday Mass, and still attend your family’s church–although with some limitations (like not being able to receive communion, for example). Is there a Catholic church within walking distance (even if it requires a bit of an effort)? Is there a bus/subway/light rail that you can take? Do you know anybody at a Catholic parish that wouldn’t mind taking you at least part of the way? You could even attend the Catholic parish on Saturday evenings for your Sunday Mass (the Mass is considered a Sunday Mass in the U.S.) and then go with your parents on Sunday morning to the Methodist church.

With regards to the praise band and communion at your family’s church, I wouldn’t do either. Communion really seems like a problem if you authentically believe in the Real Presence. The problem with the praise band is that you aren’t really a Methodist, are you? It seems weird to me to be leading worship in a church whose beliefs you don’t even share. I’ve heard of pastors staying in their positions at Protestant churches while journeying to the Catholic faith, but your situation isn’t really similar to that.
My advice to you—other than first of all contacting a priest to help you through all of this—is to really commit yourself to it as fully as you humanly can. Set aside time for daily prayer, familiarize yourself with the Catechism and other Church documents, read Scripture, pray the Rosary. Really throw yourself into the arms of our Lord and don’t get too frustrated with the challenges inherent in your situation. Try to spend as much time as you can, within reason, before the Blessed Sacrament. Involve yourself in Catholic life as much as you can. Ask our Lady for the grace of peace when it comes to dealing with your family, especially when they don’t understand the journey you’re on.

I just have to say that I love reading this. My journey was a bit different than yours, but I was basically a Methodist growing up and I was about your age when I started exploring other religious ideas. I know exactly how awkward and difficult that can be and I assure you of my prayers.
 
Mary_Estelle said:
I may be wrong ,but I know of a person who did become a Catholic at a fairly young age, entered a well known religious order at 16 and is there today. I assume she had parental permission. Her family converted after she became a Sister. Correct me if I am wrong.
Click to expand...
RCIA is for anyone 15 years old and up, so, no, age isn’t really an issue in this.
 
Mary_Estelle said:
I may be wrong ,but I know of a person who did become a Catholic at a fairly young age, entered a well known religious order at 16 and is there today. I assume she had parental permission. Her family converted after she became a Sister. Correct me if I am wrong.
Click to expand...
Of course there’s probably exceptions in various places. A beloved Monsignor at our old parish personally instructed many people, even children as young as 12. But it was a very rural parish, and the child’s parents gave full consent.
However, a priest won’t generally allow a “child” to be in formation without the expressed consent of parents. There is a children’s version of these classes, but it’s generally for the un Baptized and scenarios where the parents are Catholic as well, or converting as well.
The church values obedience to parents. Once an adult…that’s a different matter.
 
I should also mention that you don’t even have to do RCIA to convert, if that is a serious problem because of distance or transportation or whatever. When I became a Catholic (7 years ago) I was basically personally catechized by the bishop of my diocese once every two or three weeks in his office for a few months. That wouldn’t work for everyone, and it wouldn’t necessarily be possible, either, but RCIA is not the only route into the Church.
 
I would sit down with my parents and express my desire to be a Catholic. Ask their permission for you to convert and attend catechesis at your local Catholic church.

Although you won’t be able to participate in the sacraments until you are Catholic, there is no embargo against Catholic prayer. I strongly encourage you to say a daily rosary, regardless of your parents’ decision, for your conversion and your parents’ eventual conversion. This is my favourite resource: it contains everything you need to pray the rosary and is free!

rosary-center.org/howto.htm#loaded

Also, the full text of the Catechism of the Catholic Church is available on the Vatican website, linked below:
vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/_INDEX.HTM

God bless and welcome to the path to Catholicism!!! Even if there is a delay from parental permission, know that you will ultimately be received into the Church. That’s a HUGE cause for celebration!!!
 
I am a recent convert. Growing up I wanted to bad to be Catholic but feared telling my family. Looking back I wish I would have tried harder to convert when I was younger. We had many young men and women in our RCIA class my daughter was one of them she is 10 and received all sacraments at the same time as my husband and I. As a parent I understand your mothers feeling that its a family thing. My daughter was given the choice I was scared she wouldn’t want to convert but thankfully she did but would have respected her choice not to. Here is the thing maybe explain to your mom how much it means to you and how you understand how much it means to her you all go as a family to church. Maybe make a compromise where you go with her to church even if you dont fully participate in the things the Catholic church wouldn’t to and that she allows you to go to the Catholic church and learn the faith. Maybe find someone like your friend see if they would be willing to take you to mass or even attend RCIA with you and sponsor you. Who knows what will happen but dont lose faith in time it will happen when it is truly right for you. Maybe over time your change will inspire your family to look in to converting to.
 
pianistclare said:
Being only 15, you will not be able to join the RCIA classes. They are for adults.
You CAN however, start attending the teen catechesis classes with your parents permission at the Catholic church. There may be a fee for their youth groups, and they would be delighted to have you join any choirs they have.
You really need to see if your parents have an issue with you attending church at the Catholic church. If they do, as their child, you should respect their wishes and continue in your church. When you turn 18, you can make a decision to convert on your own, without their permission, but hopefully, with their blessing.
Ask your friend to get you a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (the green one) and read up and become familiar with what the Church teaches on various subjects. Go to Mass with her when you can, and be the best person you can be in your faith…obedient both to God and your parents. Since you are not Catholic yet, you are not bound by the rule to not take communion in your church. If you feel it is pointless, that is another matter. I would caution you to defy your parents however.
It’s great that you have a friend that is introducing you to the faith. God bless her.
Click to expand...
My 14 & 16 year old daughters went through with my wife and I plus we had a 17 year old high school junior in our RCIA class.

My advise get some books to do independent study, join RCIA when he can drive and attend Sat Mass after confirmation then he can go to church with his mother on Sunday morning.

I would invite my mom to go with me to RCIA so she can learn about the faith but no pressure to convert.
 
I really wasn’t going to write this but have a overwhelming urge to so Im just going to give in.

I was Methodist for over 10 years but it is nothing like the Catholic Church and most Catholics would be shocked at some of the things they “allow” members to believe. For example:
  1. There are clergy that teach that no one really goes to hell.
  2. They are supportive of gay rights.
  3. If you believe in a woman’s right to choose they support your right to do so.
  4. The confirmation process is a joke IMO.
It really has become more of a affirmation denomination than one that teaches the story of Christ. I left because I longed for teaching, accountability, instruction and a quality prayer life. I’m constantly amazed at how the Catholic Church has not only fulfilled all my needs but exceeded them. I’m so grateful to have the Holy Mother and Communion of Saints in my life it’s an unbelievable experience.
 
I’m new here and haven’t posted in any forums yet, but I really need to respond to this one.

I spent most of my youth belonging to the Methodist denomination. My parents weren’t fond of me going to any church, so all hell broke loose (literally) when I asked to go to church and gave my life to Christ not too long after that.

Anyway…that was some 45 years ago. Since then I have meandered between Methodist, Baptist, Free Methodist, Full Gospel and the Vineyard movement. The reason I would move on was because I was always looking for the real thing. I knew there was something missing. I knew there was something more.

A couple of months ago, I was at that point again and cried/screamed out to God and told Him that I needed to know the truth. I asked Him why church can’t just be about Him? Why can’t we go to church and just worship You? Why aren’t You the center of our services? I was exasperated and decided I had entered the ranks of the “Dones.”

Shortly after that, I was driving and remembered that I had stumbled onto a Catholic radio station a few months earlier. I felt compelled to find it again. Hallelujah! I found it!!! Almost immediately, I KNEW that this was it! This was the truth! This is what I have been looking for for years.

That being said, I just want to pass on a little advise/wisdom.
  1. The hardest part will be sitting/listening/etc in a Protestant church after you know the Truth.
  2. Use the time to meditate or recite the Rosary, etc.
  3. Let your praise be praise! You will be praising from a deeper place 🙂 (I also play the keyboard and sing in a Methodist praise band)
  4. Don’t divide your family over where you go to church. Consider this prep time to make your full commitment to the Catholic church.
  5. Don’t argue about either faith. The only thing that will do is divide. Live it so well that your REAL faith will be felt and seen in all you do, say and desire.
  6. Learn everything you can about the Catholic faith. Read Church History, the Catechism, conversion stories. Devour the richness and truth of Catholicism! We can all be praying to keep your fire going!
It may seem a little strange that I am responding to your post when I am just now starting this journey myself and have not converted yet.

But…I know it’s TRUTH! And I just can’t stay quiet!

Blessings!
 
SilverStreak57 said:
I’m new here and haven’t posted in any forums yet, but I really need to respond to this one.

I spent most of my youth belonging to the Methodist denomination. My parents weren’t fond of me going to any church, so all hell broke loose (literally) when I asked to go to church and gave my life to Christ not too long after that.

Anyway…that was some 45 years ago. Since then I have meandered between Methodist, Baptist, Free Methodist, Full Gospel and the Vineyard movement. The reason I would move on was because I was always looking for the real thing. I knew there was something missing. I knew there was something more.

A couple of months ago, I was at that point again and cried/screamed out to God and told Him that I needed to know the truth. I asked Him why church can’t just be about Him? Why can’t we go to church and just worship You? Why aren’t You the center of our services? I was exasperated and decided I had entered the ranks of the “Dones.”

Shortly after that, I was driving and remembered that I had stumbled onto a Catholic radio station a few months earlier. I felt compelled to find it again. Hallelujah! I found it!!! Almost immediately, I KNEW that this was it! This was the truth! This is what I have been looking for for years.

That being said, I just want to pass on a little advise/wisdom.
  1. The hardest part will be sitting/listening/etc in a Protestant church after you know the Truth.
  2. Use the time to meditate or recite the Rosary, etc.
  3. Let your praise be praise! You will be praising from a deeper place 🙂 (I also play the keyboard and sing in a Methodist praise band)
  4. Don’t divide your family over where you go to church. Consider this prep time to make your full commitment to the Catholic church.
  5. Don’t argue about either faith. The only thing that will do is divide. Live it so well that your REAL faith will be felt and seen in all you do, say and desire.
  6. Learn everything you can about the Catholic faith. Read Church History, the Catechism, conversion stories. Devour the richness and truth of Catholicism! We can all be praying to keep your fire going!
It may seem a little strange that I am responding to your post when I am just now starting this journey myself and have not converted yet.

But…I know it’s TRUTH! And I just can’t stay quiet!

Blessings!
Click to expand...
Great post and have a blessed voyage home to the Catholic Church. If you have access to a Chapel of Perpetual Adoration take advantage. Unbelievable experience where Christ is the absolute center to be glorified and praised.
 
I am a recent convert. I too was shocked at how much it involves Jesus and the Holy Trinity in general. My conversion was like coming home.

I am quite a bit older than you so my situation is a little different. My mother is not accepting of my conversion. It varies by the day on her view points. Since you are 15, I would have an honest discussion with your mother. Calmly explain your view points. Your goal is not to convert her, but help her understand the Catholic beliefs. There is a lot of misinformation out there. If this does not work, you can always convert when you are 18.

As far as, how much you participate at the Methodist church, that is up to you. You are not Catholic yet, so you are not bound by our rules. It is a personal decision on that one.

I wish you the best on your conversion process. I would encourage you to pray for guidance on these issues.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top