How should non-believers address Catholic Priests?

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AgnosTheist

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*Dear Miss Manners,
I am a 50 year old Catholic priest who appreciates your contribution to a more civilized world. As a priest, people are usually polite and well-mannered in my presence, with one glaring exception.

I confess that I am a bit irked by the growing popularity of addressing total strangers by their first names in the banking industry. The tellers at my bank always address me by my first name, even when I am attired in full priestly garb. I have tried responding, “Oh, do I know you? Since you used my first name, I feel sure I should remember yours. I am so sorry.”

Am I being too persnickety in thinking that one should use a title (Fr., Mr., etc.) when addressing an older, business client? I spoke once to a branch manager who informed me it was the “company policy.” Am I wrong for preferring a little more decorum in these situations?*

Dear Catholics,

How do you think should we non-believers address your Priests?

Dear Fellow Infidels,

How should we address their Priests?
 
Why can’t you say Fr. So-n-So? It is his title, no different than anyone else. I suppose you wouldn’t want anyone else around to actually think you consider a priest a spiritual father:eek: , so just fall back on “Mr.”.
If I was introduced to a Protestant minister or a Rabbi, I would certainly use the “Pastor” or “Reverend” title for the former, and “Rabbi” for the latter.
 
Dear Catholics,
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How do you think should we non-believers address your Priest?
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Dear Agnos Theist:

Common sense and courtesy would dictate that you ‘address’ a person as he or she requests, if you know what he or she requests.

Now if a bank has a policy of addressing by ‘first names’, and you address a man coming in as “Joe” because he signs his name Joseph Smith, and he ‘accepts’ your address, fine.

If he says to you, “Sir, or Ma’am, I prefer to be called Joseph–or Mr. Smith–or FATHER Smith–”, then you have the obligation, under common courtesy, to comply with his request, bank policy of ‘first names’ or not.

So if you know that a man happens to be a Catholic priest, you should address him as “Father”. If he wants you to call him “Joe” (or whatever) he’ll let you know.

IOW, he has a ‘right’ to be given the name or title that he bears (and not what ‘policy’ dictates). . .as do we all.

P.S. That goes for infidels too. I never heard that infidels were ‘excused’ from either giving or receiving common courtesy simply because they were infidels, after all.
 
All ordained persons or religious leaders ought to addressed by his/her title no matter if the addressee is a person of that faith or not. For example, I would always use the title “Rabbi” for a rabbi although I am not Jewish nor a member of the Jewish faith. IT’S JUST GOOD MANNERS.
 
Della said:
All ordained persons or religious leaders ought to addressed by his/her title no matter if the addressee is a person of that faith or not. For example, I would always use the title “Rabbi” for a rabbi although I am not Jewish nor a member of the Jewish faith. IT’S JUST GOOD MANNERS.
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GOOD MANNERS! Seems many have forgotten that little nicety.
 
You know, the issue of ‘non belief’ does not impact address.

As has been pointed out, individuals here may be Catholic but would address a rabbi as Rabbi (even though said Catholic does not profess to be a ‘believer’ of Judaism), would address a pastor as “Pastor”, etc.

So, whether you are a ‘believer’ or not, you should address a person with the same courtesy and respect you would ask for yourself.

Now let’s hope this does not open the usual floodgates of dragging in megalomaniacs, “satanists”, etc. to try to ‘disprove’ or play the ‘hypocrite’ card. :rolleyes:
 
I can’t always tell who is a Catholic priest unless I ask them. I once ran into a priest on a cruise ship and I asked him if he was a Catholic priest and he said, “yes”. It made me happy because I am Catholic too.
But just because someone is wearing a priest type outfit it doesn’t mean they are Catholic. They could be ministers from other religions.
I personally will just say SIR if I am not clear on who they are.
I think it is tacky to call a religious leader/preacher by their first name. It is best just to say SIR. I think that is the best thing for me to say even if I worked in a bank.
 
Tantum_ergo said:
Common sense and courtesy would dictate that you ‘address’ a person as he or she requests, if you know what he or she requests.
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I think it depends on the title and what honors & authority he has in relation to a non-believer. Like would you call a cult leader “Prophet” simply because thats how his followers refer to him? That would be stroking his ego as well as acknowledging that he has some degree of superiority.
 
at the very least i’d think you should call them reverend or pastor or something. i say this because i think the only people who would really have a problem with this would be those who follow the “call no man father” thing.
 
I think it depends on the title and what honors & authority he has in relation to a non-believer. Like would you call a cult leader “Prophet” simply because thats how his followers refer to him? That would be stroking his ego as well as acknowledging that he has some degree of superiority.
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See below:

Now let’s hope this does not open the usual floodgates of dragging in megalomaniacs, “satanists”, etc. to try to ‘disprove’ or play the ‘hypocrite’ card.

as well as:
All ordained persons or religious leaders ought to addressed by his/her title no matter if the addressee is a person of that faith or not.
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I’d call him “father”. When I have, on rare occassions, seen priests speak (at peace rallies, etc.), they are introduced as father so and so. So it must be ok.
 
I think that simple good manners would tell us, to call people by their appropriate titles.
And, of course, there is nothing wrong with calling someone “sir”. (Unless of course, it is a:D lady… Then,😉 “ma’am” is generally preferable. ).
 
If you are in a job or some position where you have to kiss up to people, you have to call them whatever they want. If you like your job.

If you are like me then you don’t call someone father unless they are your dad or God, you don’t call someone rabbi if they teach Jesus isn’t Messiah, etc. I call them by their first name, if they don’t like that then HEY YOU works too.
 
Zooey said:
I think that simple good manners would tell us, to call people by their appropriate titles.
And, of course, there is nothing wrong with calling someone “sir”. (Unless of course, it is a:D lady… Then,😉 “ma’am” is generally preferable. ).
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Yeah, it’s not hard.
Use Sir or Ma’am when in doubt.

Using first names in a place of buisness is unprofessional anyways.
 
If I was an employee, and someone dressed in what appeared to be priestly garb came in, I would probably address them as Mr. Lastname unless there was some indication somewhere in writing that he was a Father.

Why? I don’t know the differences between an Episcopal priest, a Catholic priest, an Orthodox priest, a rabbi, or insert some other person likely to be dressed similarly to a Catholic priest/other religious figure here. I’m reasonably sure “Father” would be an okay address for a priest of an Episcopal, Catholic, or Orthodox church. However, I don’t think the rabbi would be too happy with it. And I don’t know what the differences are.

At the grocery store I worked at, we always addressed customers by Mr./Mrs./Ms. and the last name. First names would be unthinkable with a stranger and a customer to boot! It’s common courtesy. It’s not that difficult, is it?

If I knew that the person was a Catholic or Orthodox priest, I would call them Father. I would probably call the Episcopal priest Father as well, since that’s what I’ve always heard them referred to as.

I’m actually Christian, but I would think non-believers could and should do the same. It’s a title for priests, and if you know for sure that’s their title, then you should use it.
 
AgnosTheist said:
Dear Fellow Infidels,
How should we address their Priests?
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‘Father’. Bishops get ‘Your Excellency’, cardinals ‘Your Eminence’ and so on and so forth. Same like many varieties of Protestant minister get ‘Pastor’ or ‘Brother’. I have an Episcopal relative who I’d refer to as ‘Mother’ if I had to talk officially in any capacity. It isn’t about belief, it’s about courtesy and respect: they are shepherds and leaders.

One thing you’ve gotten me curious about that I haven’t run into yet is – what is the proper term of address for an imam, mullah, or other Muslim cleric? 🙂
 
Sorry, I’m not Catholic, but if I call priests anything, I call them Father

Curious
 
His alone, you better read that scripture againl. It also says to call no man reverend. And since you brought it up, why then does Paull refer to himself as Father? It also says not to call anyone teacher or rabii. yet there are many forms of the word teacher…mister, doctor come to mind.

This is a typical pulled out of context usage. I understand where you’re coming from because I used to believe the same but got so confused at the mixed messages from scripture. Now I have a better understanding of the real underlying issue that Jesus was addressing.
 
panoikei said:
His alone, you better read that scripture againl. It also says to call no man reverend. And since you brought it up, why then does Paull refer to himself as Father? It also says not to call anyone teacher or rabii. yet there are many forms of the word teacher…mister, doctor come to mind.

This is a typical pulled out of context usage. I understand where you’re coming from because I used to believe the same but got so confused at the mixed messages from scripture. Now I have a better understanding of the real underlying issue that Jesus was addressing.
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You know the bible says do not swear let your yes be yes and your no be no.
So if I am ever called upon as in court to swear I politely say I do not swear.
Im funny like that.
 
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