Hi Jimmy:
I’ve been addicted to porn since I was 11 or 12. I can clearly remember the first time I ever looked at it. I have not looked at porn for the past 2 years, and I were you right now, I wouldn’t believe that I could ever go that long without it.
I too tried devotions, the rosary which I said over and over. The confessional where I would go sometimes every day for years and years. My wife eventually found out about my problem, and even at the possibility of her leaving me I couldn’t put the stuff down.
Jesus says that if you lust in your heart, you have already committed adultury in your actions. Getting rid of my computer wouldn’t have worked for me. My problem was inside and not outside.
The way I got clean was through honesty. I told my wife, that I had failed her again. I told my parents that I was addicted to porn. I talked to a priest named Fr. Emmerich (do a search on the net) and learned that the only way I could stay “sober” was to check into the nearest 12 step program. I found an accountability partner that I talked to every night. This must be someone you trust, that you can tell everything to. Every night tell them what your temptations were, and how you fell, or didn’t fall. It’s amazing how much power is taken out of temptation if you know that you will be talking about them later.
I can’t tell you what the answer is for you, I can only tell you what has worked for me. Let me assure you, the road is long, but there is an abundance of peace available for you.
The only way for me to stay “sober/pure” is to do my best, and reach out to others.
Internet porn blocking programs are necessary, throwing out catalogues is necessary, exercise is necessary, but he most important thing is that without Christ nothing is possible. Without the grace of God, I would be in your shoes, today. I just want to tell you that there is hope.
Get a hold of Paul Rasavage at Pornnomore. He is a Godsend. And buy the book he recommends by Rosemary Scott called Clean of Heart.
You can phone Sexaholics Annonymous and receive free counselling over the phone. I don’t know the #
Or phone the Helpline for Pornography Addiction at 1-800-583-2964. They are trained counselors who offer assistance to addicts or their spouses.
This website:
www.xxxchurch.com provides free software that can be downloaded. It doesn’t block porn, but it will send a list of every questionable site that you have visited to your accountability partner.
There are many online SA meetings. I’ve been to them and they are great. You have to go to
www.sexaa.org to find out about these sites, or do some more asking around, but they are worth it for sure, just let the Holy Spirit guide you.
Jimmy, right now you are reaching out, and that’s the last thing Satan wants you to do. He will use his biggest weapon, FEAR to hinder any further attempt at pursuing any of the things that I have mentioned. Just know that although Jesus is is manifest wholey in the Catholic Church he is also present outside it too. Don’t be afraid to look for him in Protestant or non-denominational programs. You need to get clean, and with God’s help you will.
Just don’t be afraid to reach out, and say, “My life has become insane and unmanageable and I’m powerless over my addiction.” This has nothing to do with your will power or strength, only by surrendering this problem to God, and asking him to fight the battle instead of you, will you succeed.
And by the way, don’t think that marriage makes porn addiction any easier.
God bless you Jimmy and all those reading who battle this awful addiction. Sorry I wrote for so long.
Shaun
PS Print this off and use the addresses as a reference.