How to avoid the big M

[joecap]

Greetings all!

This may help with the sins regarding the Big “M”, I think we all know what I am talking about.

It is my opinion that the little venial sins…such as sudden anger or impatience, or a quick curse word, etc. are the most difficult sins to avoid, as they usually happen very quickly.

I find that if I suddenly “snap” at somebody in anger, I did not really have time to ponder what I was about to do. While I am not making excuses for these type of sins, they usually happen so quickly that there is no real intent to purposely do something that is against God’s laws.

I pray for the grace to keep myself from doing them, and I ask forgiveness for them, but I think they are termed Venial because there is no pre-meditation.

Now, regarding the more serious sins, such as fornication and M, I have found a way to avoid this because of the fact that a sin like this DOES require some kind of awareness of what I am about to do.

I find that when the temptation hits, I can at least pause and remember the past sins I have done of this type. Do I regret them? Of course I do! I sincerely wish I had never done them!

So if I fall to my current temptation, will I regret it in the future and wish I had not done it? Uh, yeah…duh!

So what I am trying to say, is that how can I agree to do a new sin while at the same time regretting the same sin in the past?! That would mean that I really don’t regret them! I just can’t rationalize in my mind that I can truly regret a past sin if I am willingly just about to do the same one.

If I think about this hard enough, it scares me enough to think that my past confessions are not valid!

I know this is a convoluted way to think, but remember, in a sin that is not spontaneous, we actually DO have time to think about what we are about to do.
I believe that is why sins of this nature are grave and Mortal. Our mind is more complicit in the act.

This has helped me be “M”-free for the past 6 months!
By the grace of God.

 

[DanteAlighieri]

If I think about this hard enough, it scares me enough to think that my past confessions are not valid!

I know this is a convoluted way to think, but remember, in a sin that is not spontaneous, we actually DO have time to think about what we are about to do.
I believe that is why sins of this nature are grave and Mortal. Our mind is more complicit in the act.

This has helped me be “M”-free for the past 6 months!
By the grace of God.

Way to keep yourself free from the sin of Manicheism!

Seriously, though, I know what you’re talking about. With regards to impulsive sins (lashing out in anger, for example), it can become mortal if one does not strive to correct it – which it sounds like you are doing. To control such impulses requires a complete reconditioning of the will, such that one’s natural impulses change over time.

Regarding the big M, however, some folks struggle with a compulsion to commit this sin, which may reduce their culpability a bit. In those cases, reflecting on their regret for having sinned in the past may not be enough to overcome their present urges. I commend you for keeping yourself from getting to that point, because it takes a lot of Manicheism to become a habitual Manichee!

Peace,
Dante

 

[RachelB]

Thanks for this helpful post and congrats on being… heresy-free for 6 months

I find beginning to pray the Rosary helps a lot, too

 

[Smber2c]

Hey, I think this is great. Anything one can do to stregnthen their resolve is a great support.

Just like using the embarassment of talking to a priest. The weight of sharing with an accountability partner.

Being very philosophically minded, this idea of being able to have repented while about to indulge in the sin again…it seems to not really fit in the same head at once.

 

[puzzleannie]

another thing that works is getting so old and sick you don’t have the energy for M or any other letter of the alphabet. Then your venial sins become your mortal sins, because they are the ones capable of doing the most damage: things like sins of the tongue (last thing to go after the knees, back, arteries, and brain cells) as St. James warns in his epistle.