How to Combat Anxiety About Prayer?

[Ricky_C]

I’ve recently been finding more and more that I struggle with prayer, not in that I don’t know what to say, but in that I just don’t feel sincere when I do. I’m pretty sure it relates to my scrupulosity somehow, but I just haven’t been able to put my finger on it.

I have a prayer routine where I pray once as soon as I wake up (thanking God for the day He’s given and asking for various intentions), once before each meal (thanking God for the food, asking Him to bless it, and asking Him to provide for those without food and keep them close to Him), and once before bed (evaluating the significant events of the day, and praying for help in my issues).
The prayer routine itself is pretty solid, and when I consider what I’m actually praying for, I know that it’s true and that the things I ask are things I honestly want, but there’s always this voice in my head that’s telling me that I don’t mean what I say, and I just can’t feel what I’m praying.
Like, I can ask God to protect the victims of a fire, and I won’t have any apathy for these people; I honestly want them to be helped in their situation, but something just keeps me from feeling like I’m making an honest prayer, as much as I honestly want the intention to be carried out.

I’ll have a split-second where I’m making this intention and I feel like I’m honestly praying for it, then a split-second where what I’m saying feels fake, and after that, things fall apart and I’m unable to convince myself of what I’m praying for. I can’t “lock” myself into this first split-second, and I always subconsciously think that it’s not a real intention, and that thought becomes a self-fulfilling thought.

It happens the most with prayers I’ve recited multiple times, like traditional prayers (the Hail Mary, the Our Father, etc.) and my grace prayers before meals; I know that at some level I honestly feel what I’m praying, but I just can’t dispel this doubt that’s in many of my prayers.
I understand that this is an extremely vague thing to describe, but would anyone happen to have any knowledge on what’s going on with me, or what I can do to resolve this? Any help is appreciated so much; thanks a million, and God bless!

 

[Jelrak_TB]

I’ve recently been finding more and more that I struggle with prayer, not in that I don’t know what to say, but in that I just don’t feel sincere when I do. I’m pretty sure it relates to my scrupulosity somehow, but I just haven’t been able to put my finger on it.

I have a prayer routine where I pray once as soon as I wake up (thanking God for the day He’s given and asking for various intentions), once before each meal (thanking God for the food, asking Him to bless it, and asking Him to provide for those without food and keep them close to Him), and once before bed (evaluating the significant events of the day, and praying for help in my issues).
The prayer routine itself is pretty solid, and when I consider what I’m actually praying for, I know that it’s true and that the things I ask are things I honestly want, but there’s always this voice in my head that’s telling me that I don’t mean what I say, and I just can’t feel what I’m praying.
Like, I can ask God to protect the victims of a fire, and I won’t have any apathy for these people; I honestly want them to be helped in their situation, but something just keeps me from feeling like I’m making an honest prayer, as much as I honestly want the intention to be carried out.

I’ll have a split-second where I’m making this intention and I feel like I’m honestly praying for it, then a split-second where what I’m saying feels fake, and after that, things fall apart and I’m unable to convince myself of what I’m praying for. I can’t “lock” myself into this first split-second, and I always subconsciously think that it’s not a real intention, and that thought becomes a self-fulfilling thought.

It happens the most with prayers I’ve recited multiple times, like traditional prayers (the Hail Mary, the Our Father, etc.) and my grace prayers before meals; I know that at some level I honestly feel what I’m praying, but I just can’t dispel this doubt that’s in many of my prayers.
I understand that this is an extremely vague thing to describe, but would anyone happen to have any knowledge on what’s going on with me, or what I can do to resolve this? Any help is appreciated so much; thanks a million, and God bless!

The brain is trained to filter out the habitual and to pay closer attention to the novel. This is why commuters on a familiar route might often find they have traveled entire blocks without being actively aware of their progress. In this way it is possible that the very routine nature of your prayer cycle is suggesting to your brain that it need not focus as much on the task. This may be making it difficult to achieve a full feeling of sincerity. Regardless of what action you may consider to resolve such a difficulty it is certain that God would not mind this inconsistency on your part. Were it me I would attempt to associate the prayers for individuals with pictures (either of them or a suitable association) to infuse a bit more clarity into your mental image.

 

[St_Francis]

What counts is what you *will *to do, not what you feel. Your emotions are not entirely under your control, so these flickers of feeling “insincere” are nothing more than temptations to get you to stop doing the right thing.

That being said, are you working on improving your prayer life? Learning to pray well is like learning a musical instrument. Right now, you are playing a few scales each day. It may be time for you to expand your repetoire by adding in some more vocal prayers, the Rosary, and moving up to mental prayer.

Also, it can be helpful to change your regular prayers from time to time. Given what Jelrak wrote, the novelty might help you focus.

Do not worry about achieving perfection in prayer! Esp when you start, you will not feel prayerful, you will be continually distracted, and it will seem like a mess. Persevere. Just like an instrument, you will get better through practice, and it will become a great pleasure.

 

[fred_conty]

I would suggest that you pause before praying and think about a scene of Jesus in the New Testiment.

In the morning start with thinking about Jesus on the Cross offering himself to the Father on our behalf. Then make your morning offering in like spirit.

At mealtime, pause to think about the Last Supper where he was filled with love for all of us. Or at Cana, where he supplied the meal with wine. Or on the hillside of Gallilee where the people were listening to him and he fed them. Or when he was a boy and ate supper with Joseph and Mary.

At night, to think of him in the garden praying to his Father or at other times when he went off alone to pray in the desert or hillside.

Our imagination is a wonderful gift in rousing our love for him before we pray to him.

We are just human and that is all that Our Lord expects us to be, which means we are imperfect in what we do. But if we take an image of Jesus that pleases us, and use it to make him real in our mind, our mind can touch him and make his presence real. It is much easier for us to see him first and then converse with him. A picture is worth a thousand words.

St. Teresa of Avilla highly recommended this help in prayer … to place the image of Jesus in our mind first.

 

[Bookcat]

Feelings are not the barometer of prayer.

 

[Bookcat]

I will re-post another older post of mine.

A person struggles with scruples - what ought they do?

A person with scrupulosity --ought to have a* “regular confessor” who can direct them --and even give them some general principles* to follow -to apply (principles for them due to their particular scruples -they are usually not for those with a normal conscience).

Thus with their direction they can “dismiss scruples” (in the older language despise them) - “act against them” (agere contra).

Scruples are to be dismissed ~ not argued with.

To borrow and image from a Carthusian from centuries ago: Scruples *are like a barking dog or a hissing goose -one does not stop to argue with a barking dog or a hissing goose does one? * No one keeps walking.

Such ‘obedience’ to a regular confessor who knows of ones scruples (except in what is manifest sin - such as if he told them it was ok to murder someone or something certain like that) is key. Such is the age old practice.

Also counseling -(especially if one also has OCD) could be helpful depending on the case -but one would want to look for a counselor who can assist one in following the Churches Teachings - not go contrary to them (I have heard CA staff mention catholictherapists.com/)

Here was a not too long ago post from Jimmy Akin of CA that I saw in the Register and saved for those who struggle with such.

ncregister.com/blog/jimmy-akin/6-tools-for-the-scrupulous

And a regular confessor can also help one in terms of knowing the “feelings” are not the barometer of prayer. To “act against” (agere contra) such fears.

 

[Bookcat]

You will it - that is you pray. Do not look for feelings nor think that if there is no feeling that you do not mean it. You are willing it…thus you mean it.