How to confess to a priest?

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Newgirl13

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A bit about my story: I’ve been baptized in the Holy Church as an infant, but my parents where never really catholic. As a child, I took catechism lessons and had my First Holy Communion. A few years later, I wandered around a few churches and then got involved in the LDS church, got baptized there and even became a leader. In my daily scripture studies, I began to learn more about the gospel and realised that many things preached there where not compatible with Bible teachings and that there were many contradictions, so I started to look for the real Church of Christ again. After many months researching on topics I didn’t understand or thought I understood(but actually didn’t), I finally realised that the Holy Church was exactly what I was looking for. I’m still struggling to get out of the LDS church(since many of my friends are LDS and I know they will try to get me back there), but I made up my mind and I’m ready to go back where I belong.

The only time I’ve ever confessed was before my First Communion and I don’t remember if there is anything I need to say or do right before the confession. Also, for the fact that I was in another church, will I be excommunicated? If so, what happens when someone is excommunicated and what should I do to get back in Church?
 
As far as confession goes, the usual formula probably runs like this. When having entered the confessional, say something to the effect “Bless me Father for I have sinned.” (I always say those exact words up front to let him know I’m there) Then to state how long it has been since your last confession (in your case your first confession when you were a child). Then you tell the priest your sins. The priest will then maybe ask a few simple questions and then give some advise, give you your penance and then absolve you. Rather simple. Nothing should be too different just because you haven’t been in a while.

I don’t think you are excommunicated. I would ask the priest about your situation but as far as I know you just have to go to confession since you already a Catholic. Just one who has wandered. 😉
 
Find a priest to talk to. All you need to do is make a good confession. Joining another church is one of the things you should confess. There are various guides to confession available online. If you have not been confirmed, you should look into that.
 
Entwhistler was pretty much spot on. I would take the time to learn a good Act of Contrition, since faithful priests always ask you for one. If you don’t memorize it, that’s ok. Most confessionals have an Act of Contrition taped to the wall, and it’s not a breach of etiquette to even bring your own card or paper copy.

As for excommunication, don’t believe the media hype. Catholics are not all about things like shunning and disfellowshipping. We leave that to the other sects. We have all “excommunicated” ourselves at various times, for nothing more than having committed a mortal sin, maybe simply missing Mass on Sunday (a precept of the Church), or knowingly cheating on our taxes (stealing). Anything that separates us from the grace of Our Blessed Lord makes us unable to partake of Holy Communion, and that is really what “excommunication” means. There, see, I’ve demystified the whole concept. All we really have to do in order to receive Our Blessed Lord again is have contrition, confess our sins, and perform our penance, which usually consists of about 5-10 minutes of prayerful reflection.
 
Entwhistler said:
As far as confession goes, the usual formula probably runs like this. When having entered the confessional, say something to the effect “Bless me Father for I have sinned.” (I always say those exact words up front to let him know I’m there) Then to state how long it has been since your last confession (in your case your first confession when you were a child). Then you tell the priest your sins.)
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the protocol for confession is pretty well known in popular culture, for anyone who has seen portrayals of the sacrament on tv or movies.

but the critical part of confession is the examination of conscience before hand
 
  1. Go into the confessional.
  2. Kneel down.
  3. Tell the priest what you typed above.
The priest won’t care a whit that you don’t know the proper format. He’ll be overjoyed that you’re there. Like a lost sheep that’s been found. Like a prodigal son who has returned.
 
Ok, I might need help here cradle Catholics but I was wondering… wouldn’t she need to go through something since she was never confirmed Catholic??? She was baptized and had her first Communion but never was confirmed, right. I personally think it would be important to learn the Churces teachings as she never did if she left after first Communion which in our diocese is 2nd grade. Having been endoctrinated heavily as a Mormon she would better be able to confess after learning her Catholic faith. Am I wrong?
mlz

Bottom line…I’d share your story to a priest before doing anything. He is best to advise😊
 
Newgirl13 said:
A bit about my story: I’ve been baptized in the Holy Church as an infant, but my parents where never really catholic. As a child, I took catechism lessons and had my First Holy Communion. A few years later, I wandered around a few churches and then got involved in the LDS church, got baptized there and even became a leader. In my daily scripture studies, I began to learn more about the gospel and realised that many things preached there where not compatible with Bible teachings and that there were many contradictions, so I started to look for the real Church of Christ again. After many months researching on topics I didn’t understand or thought I understood(but actually didn’t), I finally realised that the Holy Church was exactly what I was looking for. I’m still struggling to get out of the LDS church(since many of my friends are LDS and I know they will try to get me back there), but I made up my mind and I’m ready to go back where I belong.

The only time I’ve ever confessed was before my First Communion and I don’t remember if there is anything I need to say or do right before the confession. Also, for the fact that I was in another church, will I be excommunicated? If so, what happens when someone is excommunicated and what should I do to get back in Church?
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Please call your parish office and make an appointment to speak with a priest. He can hear your confession, then and there; walking you through the process. You should also inquire about joining the next RCIA class (it should start in September or early Fall). The RCIA will bring you up to date an Church teaching, also help you with Confirmation and you will meet new Catholic friends. Don’t worry about excommunication, a talk with the priest and a good confession will take care of it. Welcome Home! :grouphug:
 
Newgirl13 said:
A bit about my story: I’ve been baptized in the Holy Church as an infant, but my parents where never really catholic. As a child, I took catechism lessons and had my First Holy Communion. A few years later, I wandered around a few churches and then got involved in the LDS church, got baptized there and even became a leader. In my daily scripture studies, I began to learn more about the gospel and realised that many things preached there where not compatible with Bible teachings and that there were many contradictions, so I started to look for the real Church of Christ again. After many months researching on topics I didn’t understand or thought I understood(but actually didn’t), I finally realised that the Holy Church was exactly what I was looking for. I’m still struggling to get out of the LDS church(since many of my friends are LDS and I know they will try to get me back there), but I made up my mind and I’m ready to go back where I belong.

The only time I’ve ever confessed was before my First Communion and I don’t remember if there is anything I need to say or do right before the confession. Also, for the fact that I was in another church, will I be excommunicated? If so, what happens when someone is excommunicated and what should I do to get back in Church?
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forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=291184&referrerid=116848
 
on_the_hill said:
  1. Go into the confessional.
  2. Kneel down.
  3. Tell the priest what you typed above.
The priest won’t care a whit that you don’t know the proper format. He’ll be overjoyed that you’re there. Like a lost sheep that’s been found. Like a prodigal son who has returned.
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Not always the case. He MAY refuse to hear your confession and ask you to make an appointment. And that is not usually easy, either. Good luck. I was a lost sheep, never made it all the way home, I was adopted out.
 
Casilda said:
Not always the case. He MAY refuse to hear your confession and ask you to make an appointment. And that is not usually easy, either. Good luck. I was a lost sheep, never made it all the way home, I was adopted out.
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:eek:

Oh my goodness!

I am sooooo sorry this happened to you! :console:

A priest refusing to hear a confession is something you see in movies or television (maybe), but I have NEVER heard of this in real life… except in your case.

As someone who left the Church for some 14 years, and had no recollection of how to do an examination of conscience, I just sort of wandered into the confessional one day after daily mass and made my confession. Father helped me through it – and I had done some pretty horrible things in those years – and he did welcome me back.

I suppose there are always exceptions to the rule, but Newgirl, please do not let someone’s horror story keep you away from the sacrament.

And it probably would make you feel better if you called the parish office and just made an appointment to meet with Father. You can make a good confession and ask all the questions you might have, and he will have time to listen and give you advice on moving forward.

Let the Holy Spirit fill your heart and guide you. ❤️
 
mlz said:
…wouldn’t she need to go through something since she was never confirmed Catholic??? She was baptized and had her first Communion but never was confirmed, right. I personally think it would be important to learn the Churces teachings as she never did if she left after first Communion which in our diocese is 2nd grade. Having been indoctrinated heavily as a Mormon she would better be able to confess after learning her Catholic faith. Am I wrong?
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Yes, she should have some catechesis and be confirmed, but does not need to do that before confessing and rejoining communion with the Church.
 
David_Nacey said:
Anything that separates us from the grace of Our Blessed Lord makes us unable to partake of Holy Communion, and that is really what “excommunication” means. There, see, I’ve demystified the whole concept.
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‘Demystified’, maybe, but kinda misrepresented it. 😉

“Excommunication” is a penalty that the Church can declare, in reaction to certain actions of people. (In fact, in some cases, it’s possible that the penalty happens without a formal decree.) Excommunication is meant to be medicinal, not punative; that is, it’s meant to incent a person to repent and to return to the church, not to punish and/or shun them and send them away permanently.

One of the effects of “excommunication” is the inability to receive any sacrament until the excommunication is officially lifted. (Once the excommunication is lifted, reception of the sacraments is again possible.)

On the other hand, there are situations other than ‘excommunication’ in which a person is not permitted to receive the Eucharist. For instance, if a person commits a mortal sin, s/he is unable to receive communion until s/he first goes to confession and receives absolution.

However, this is not “excommunication”; it’s merely the fact that one must be in a state of grace in order to receive communion (and folks in a state of mortal sin aren’t in a state of grace!).

Note the big difference: a person in a state of mortal sin may go to confession and be absolved of their sins; a person under the penalty of excommunication may not even be absolved until the excommunication is lifted.

So, when Newgirl13 asks whether she’s ‘excommunicated’, the answer is “go talk to a priest.” After all, she’s probably not, but a parish priest would be able to advise her (and, one hopes, hear her confession and give her absolution, so that she’d be able to receive the Eucharist!). She can’t receive the Eucharist until after she goes to confession and is absolved of her sins, but that doesn’t mean she’s excommunicated. 😉
 
I second what Gert says.
Don’t let the continual repetition of someone’s “story” keep you from the Sacraments.
Best wishes
 
mlz said:
Ok, I might need help here cradle Catholics but I was wondering… wouldn’t she need to go through something since she was never confirmed Catholic??? She was baptized and had her first Communion but never was confirmed, right. I personally think it would be important to learn the Churces teachings as she never did if she left after first Communion which in our diocese is 2nd grade. Having been endoctrinated heavily as a Mormon she would better be able to confess after learning her Catholic faith. Am I wrong?
mlz

Bottom line…I’d share your story to a priest before doing anything. He is best to advise😊
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Ongoing catechesis is important for each one of us, but she has already received the sacraments of Holy Communion and Confession. Resuming her sacramental life is the next step in her faith life. Confirmation should come after more catechesis, but the lack of confirmation is not a barrier for any cradle Catholic to receiving Communion. The only barrier is sin, which is why she should go to confession first.
 
There are two Forms of the Roman Rite and there are two ways to confess.

In the Extraordinary Form…

Many times, when you enter the confessional, the Priest will automatically say an audible blessing in Latin. If the priest does this, there is no need to say ‘Bless me Father.’ You immediately state: 'It has been x weeks since my last confession and then confess your sins.

When you make the Act of Contrition, the Priest will say the words of Absolution in Latin at the same time. You might find this awkward at first but you’ll get used to it. The Priest alters the pace of his words to finish when you finish your Act of Contrition.

In the Ordinary Form…

You enter the Confessional and say ‘Bless me Father’ but the Priest very rarely blesses you with an audible prayer. After you make your confession, the Priest will wait until you’ve said your Act of Contrition before he says the words of absolution.

Conclusion

Confession is the same in both Forms but there are slight differences. The penitent should say the same things but the actions of the Priest will be slightly different.
 
I just read an excellent history on the Sacrament of Reconcilliation.

Here are the stages this Sacrament has seen
  1. Canonical Penance - early church once off Sacrament that enabled early Christians who sinned to come back into the Eucharist. Note a once of only.
  2. Celtic Penance - around 3 rd century Ireland . Monks focussed on giving out Penance. People would come and confess sins, and get something like x time on bread and water. It became a Sacrament that could be repeated.
  3. Confession - around 7th century the Irish Monks took Celtic Penance to Europe. The Sacrament was changed over time to absolving the penitent. Penance was lessened greatly to ie. six Our Fathers instead of 10 years bread and water.
  4. After Vatican 11 it became Sacrament of Reconcilliation. God’s Love and Mercy became the focus. The penitent seeks to move back into the love of God. The graces are overflowing.
Dempsey 1919 what you described in the Extraordinary form is the pre Vatican 11 form.

I will copy and paste the article in a new thread for everyone’s interest. Once I work out how to do this. I found it very fascinating.
 
Dempsey 1919 what you described in the Extraordinary form is the pre Vatican 11 form.
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It’d be more accurate to say that it’s the Extraordinary Form and not the Pre-Vatican II form. I say this because it was used during Vatican II itself and continued to be used afterwards. The Traditional Latin Mass and the Sacraments have always been available alongside the newer Forms. It’s unfortunate that the vast majority of Catholics haven’t had the opportunity to experience the Extraordinary Forms.
 
Dempsey1919 said:
It’d be more accurate to say that it’s the Extraordinary Form and not the Pre-Vatican II form. I say this because it was used during Vatican II itself and continued to be used afterwards. The Traditional Latin Mass and the Sacraments have always been available alongside the newer Forms. It’s unfortunate that the vast majority of Catholics haven’t had the opportunity to experience the Extraordinary Forms.
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Yes, it was one of the last things to change, Pre Vat 11 , confessing sins in the vernacular, absolution in Latin. Focus was on a more legalistic paradigm.

After The revision of The Rite of Penance was mandated in Vat 11 the paradigm became the Eucharist.

In 1973 revisions were approved by Holy Father Pope Paul VI and introduced in Lent 1976

There is quite a difference in the Sacrament pre and post Vat 11.

I went looking to find out how or why it had changed so much.
 
There is quite a difference in the Sacrament pre and post Vat 11.
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I agree. I don’t like the different approach taken to the Sacrament post Vatican II. I can’t prove causation, but the revisions might be the reason people no longer go to Confession as often. In my parish and across my town, the lines for Confession are very small and the scheduled confession times are very short. This is a real shame because Confession is very cathartic - people don’t realise what they’re missing!
 
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