How to deal with Immodesty around you in today's era?

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TheLowestHumanBeing

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For My Traditional Brothers and Sisters Only:
How to deal with Immodesty around you in today’s era? This is the difficulty that I am heavily dealing with. I want to become a pure and chaste gentleman but man’s instincts are more powerful. Besides not going near to occasions of sin, if the scenario, or case is unavoidable like going to public places with family, what am I going to do?

Thanks In Advanced for your replies.
 
That is something I would also like to know. I understand how you feel.
 
Blessings !
Memorize scripture verses for modesty, purity of mind, chasteness of body, etc. Psalm 54: CREATE IN ME A CLEAN HEART, OH LORD! Politics is so frustrating. The Hate on the L is palpable. There are a few ppl, to whom, I wish harm would come. Before I dwell on it, I’m quoting that scripture verse. Then, scold myself for not being Christ. Then, a short discussion, why lightening bolts aren’t coming out from the sky… Create in me…
I know, you are sad for the women & girls, who reveal too much. They are someone’s daughter, wife, Mother(?).
If it was your daughter, you’d get upset. Think on them as blood relatives. The sadness, hopefully, would keep your Spirit in prayer.Dont keep looking…
You might make this a ministry of sorts. You could make up a calling card, that says,”You are beautiful. God created you a treasure to be cherished. Love yourself to dress w mystery, modestly. Don’t be a sex toy in today’s standard. Be a Princess.”
Are there boys, to whom you could speak, like CCD? Where are Godly men, as yourself, to pass the baton on, in a relay race of life.?

God, give me grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
which should be changed,
and the Wisdom to distinguish
the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as Jesus did,
This sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it,
Trusting that You will make all things right,
If I surrender to Your will,
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with You forever in the next.
Amen
Lord, inflame our hearts and our inmost beings with the fire of Your Holy Spirit, that we may serve You with chaste bodies and pure minds. Through Christ our Lord. Amen
Google purity prayers & scripture verses
 
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The key lies in the title: around you.

The world and sometimes the communities we are in can oftentimes not be the most ideal places for us to be—individually, as a family, or as a smaller group. They surround you, but they are not within your mind, body, and soul.

You can fill those, using yourself as a vessel, with chastity and whatever else needed.

The blessing with that approach is that it doesn’t matter what the world looks like, you can participate with joy in it without feeling pulled towards sin.

It’s important to realise that this is something you need to work on, and not something others should shoulder the blame for.
 
Ultimately I have found that the only real answer is to just avoid sinful behaviors and reject sinful thoughts. God gives us the grace to conquer sin. We can and should always pray for more grace, but ultimately there is no “trick” or “strategy” that will keep you from sinning. It is just a matter of not sinning. You just have to refuse to sin. If you fall, get up, get to confession, and start over again.

This is the number one most asked question on every single religious board, and the answer is tough, but simple. Just stop sinning.

At least thats how I see it and once I realized this about myself, it helped me both overcome my own sins AND JUST AS IMPORTANTLY overcome my despair when I messed up and ended up sinning again.

Sin is always two-fold. Satan tempts you to sin, and then once you sin he hits you with an even stronger temptation to despair. It isn’t okay to sin, but Jesus can forgive us. He can’t forgive us if we let ourselves be consumed with despair.

You and I are weak. We shouldn’t be surprised when we sin. We should be surprised when we don’t sin! The answer is to try to be better tomorrow than you were today, and every single day, at the end of the day, ask God to help you be better tomorrow than you were today.
 
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One of the biggest things is what is called “custody of the eyes”. I’m sure someone will come along to explain it. It’s a virtue that we men need to be more knowledgable about and practice.

I’ll let some good soul define it here, or you can google it.
 
It takes time. You’ve grown up in a world that has warped your sexuality by exposing you to lustful imagery, stories, innuendo, etc., for many years. Undoing the damage done takes many years too, but it can be done – not by you in your own strength, but by the Holy Spirit operating within you. He will fix you slowly but surely if you keep up your prayer life and don’t give up. Don’t get frustrated when you thought you’d gotten better at it and then something happens to remind you that your lust is still there. Don’t expect to be perfectly chaste in a year or so. For a man to defeat lust in himself can be a lifetime’s work. In the mean time, you already know to stay away from the near occasion of sin. And as JamalChristophr suggested, learn to take custody of your eyes. In general, be modest, even shy around girls; don’t flirt.
 
Remember that sexuality is a joyful and beautiful gift, that the body is a work of art and that the people who perform in pornography or suggestive entertainment made bad choices, but they aren’t bad people.

The sin of pornography is not that is shows too much, but that it shows too little (ie, you see the body parts, but not the whole person).
 
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I am not traditional, or even a Catholic, but something I have always done that really seems to help is to learn to say to yourself “That is someone’s child” when you see something which leads your thought down a wrong path.

Since you are Catholic, you may say “That is God’s child”.

You may need to take 5 or 10 seconds and meditate on what you just said in order for it to make an impact. It is easy to do. You can just close your eyes for that time, regardless of where you are or who you are with.
 
And follow that by praying “Lord, I thank you for creating this woman. Thank you for beauty. May you richly bless her.”
 
It is a process that takes time. Pray and be patient, the time will come that such things don’t have the effect they used to.
 
go out and get the book “The Spiritual Combat”. a wonderful guide for everybody
 
May I ask what you are considering as immodesty?

I think there is a certain sort of approach that almost sensitizes us in a bad way, to the clothing of others. Sometimes concerning ourselves too much with modesty and purity actually leads us to constantly be thinking about those around us in terms of their body and clothing.

I’ve even noticed it a bit, that after being on here I’d constantly notice when women were wearing sleeveless or cold shoulder tops. Whereas if I hadn’t been reading modesty discussions that wouldn’t even have registered.
 
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Most Awesome reply coming from a devotee of Saint Therese of the Child Jesus and Saint Catherine of Siena. Million Thanks JamalChristophr friend. May God bless you and the Virgin Mary be with you.
 
@TheLowestHumanBeing

Psalms 119:9-11 How can young people keep their way pure?By guarding it according to your word.
10 With my whole heart I seek you;do not let me stray from your commandments.11 I treasure your word in my heart,so that I may not sin against you.

Luke 2:19 But Mary treasured all these words and pondered them in her heart.51 Then he went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them. His mother treasured all these things in her heart.

Wisdom 5:19 he will take holiness as an invincible shield,
 
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