I’m sorry you lost your parent. It’s a significant loss in your Life
[Alan, I feel for you, may God bless you as you deal with what is for both you and Jason, a lifelong loss.] I lost my mother in my teens and my Dad last year, and my brother not so long ago, and they stay in your heart. You do need them around in a tangible sense but they’re not, and it’s lonely without them.
However, with the divorce and the addictions of parents, you have felt betrayed. The people who should most be there for you haven’t been there in the trustworthy way you needed in order to be totally secure in their love.
It’s not easy to overcome security issues, Jason. You can overcome them to a degree, but it can take awhile…I had trust issues, and it took a few years to overcome that and attendant self-esteem issues. There isn’t an easy fix…but the thing that does help to fix it is to be concerned with others needs and doing whatever things help to make other’s life easier.
When you do have trust and security issues, you can more easily understand others who have such issues, and in little ways, help them to feel better. I’ve had a lot of tough things happen in my life. The end result of that is that I can feel empathy, and try to give some sort of support, to others going through any of the stuff I’ve been through.
You will be able to do that.
It’s thinking of others, trying to be there for them in healthy ways, that gets you past that inward-looking sense of insecurity etc.
Even then you can sometimes sink like a stone over something that challenges your security, and sense of your value as God’s child, but with time you can get over those times more easily.
God bless you
