How to find a church when I am transsexual

[feverforever]

Note: please don’t reply if you either don’t think that being transgender is real or if you are going to discriminate.

I am a pre-operative transsexual and haven’t changed my legal name because I am not full-time, yet. I am trying to find an Anglo-Catholic church, but I am unsure since I do not know if they will accept me or not. My birth certificate is obviously not changed yet either. I want to enter the Catholic learning course this September, but worry that I will not find a church willing to take me on because of my situation. To me personally, God gave it to me. My post-operative transsexual friend said this to me and I completely got it. I feel like this is one of my many life lessons while on earth before I go to Heaven. But, I am completely scared to death that I will be discriminated against. I have never been discriminated against so far, so I can only hope that the first church I find will accept me. It’s not like I can cover it up since I am not post-operative, my birth certificate is not changed, my legal name is not changed and my infant baptism record is of course in my male name and sex.

Has anyone got any advice on finding a church in my situation?

Thank you very much in advance.

 

[St_Francis]

Anglo-Catholic churches are not the same as Catholic churches. Do you want to prepare to be Catholic, in union with the Pope? Or Anglican (UK) / Episcopal (US)?

The Catholic Church accepts everyone; however, your situation may be problematic–the Church teaches against mutilation of the body, and in the eyes of the Church you would always be male and thus in going through the surgery you would be rendering yourself unable to marry, as known impotence is a bar to marriage.

I don’t know about the Anglican/Episcopals.

 

[SaintFrancis333]

Anything goes with anglicans/epicsopals because they are a religion for people, not a religion for Christ. You will have to talk to a Priest about it. Mutilating the body is definitely a no-no, so any kind of surgery to alter the natural state God created you as, is a huge problem. I do not judge you because we all have to carry our cross in life. If you were born with the physical body of a male, you are a male and will forever be a male. Society will tell you it’s ok to mutilate your body to fit your mindset, but Christ would tell you to alter your mindset to match your body. It will not be easy, but to follow Christ the very first thing you must do is deny yourself. Going into surgery to change your sex is the exact opposite of denying yourself. I hope you find a Priest who can help explain it better. I hope I don’t sound stand offish or condescending. I certainly sympathize with the struggle you face.

 

[RoseMary131]

I am a pre-operative transsexual and haven’t changed my legal name because I am not full-time, yet. I am trying to find an Anglo-Catholic church, but I am unsure since I do not know if they will accept me or not. … But, I am completely scared to death that I will be discriminated against. … so I can only hope that the first church I find will accept me. It’s not like I can cover it up since I am not post-operative, my birth certificate is not changed, my legal name is not changed and my infant baptism record is of course in my male name and sex.

Hello Fever, God has one Church for everyone. He excludes no one from His Holy Church. Do not let your fears keep you from looking for Christ and His Church.

Is there a parish near you that you want to join? Are you looking for a Church in unison with the Pope, the Vicar of Christ?

Do you believe in the teachings of the Holy Catholic Church?

Can you make an appointment with the priest near by?

Sometimes God asks us to grow, to listen, to hear, and to reflect and pray.

May you have the strength to take this journey into the Fullness of Faith.

Peace.

 

[MidnightSun12]

The Church is ready to welcome anybody and everybody home with open arms. Our Lord wants every single human being on this earth to be Catholic and you are no exception here!

In exchange for this warm welcome, however, it’s important that we also try our very best to embrace our Lord with open-arms. One of the ways in which we need to embrace our Lord is by being willing to accept the possibility that what He wants for our lives is not the same as what we want for ourselves.

For example, when I converted to Catholicism a couple of years ago, I was a man who came from a past where I had long participated in sexually immoral acts with women to whom I was not married. I had thought for sure that, since I was in the process of becoming Catholic, God would promptly give me a Catholic women who I could marry and not be alone. The thought of being alone indefinitely scared me tremendously and was something I could simply not accept as being God’s Will for me. Over time, though, I realized that this was what God wanted for me for the time being and eventually my fear of being single started to subside. Rather then being miserable and unhappy as I thought I would be, living a single chaste life has actually proven to be a wonderful blessing (I no longer have anxiety or panic attacks like I did before my conversion, and I haven’t felt this at peace with myself since I was a child).

The important thing that I want to emphasize is that God never forced me to remain single. All along the way, while I was dating and searching for the woman I wanted, God kept giving me the attractive ladies that I was so desperately looking for, the only problem was that to be with any of these women I would ultimately have had to compromise on my faith and turn my back on God. It was that small voice telling me that I had already been down this path before and that I knew the anxiety and pain that waited at the end.

I pray that you also listen to this small voice. I also pray that God gives you the same graces He lent me during my conversion so that you can also realize that the life where you least expect to find happiness is truly the only place where it can be found!

God bless you!

 

[feverforever]

Anything goes with anglicans/epicsopals because they are a religion for people, not a religion for Christ. You will have to talk to a Priest about it. Mutilating the body is definitely a no-no, so any kind of surgery to alter the natural state God created you as, is a huge problem. I do not judge you because we all have to carry our cross in life. If you were born with the physical body of a male, you are a male and will forever be a male. Society will tell you it’s ok to mutilate your body to fit your mindset, but Christ would tell you to alter your mindset to match your body. It will not be easy, but to follow Christ the very first thing you must do is deny yourself. Going into surgery to change your sex is the exact opposite of denying yourself. I hope you find a Priest who can help explain it better. I hope I don’t sound stand offish or condescending. I certainly sympathize with the struggle you face.

But if I “change my mindset” to fit my body, then I would be homosexual (since I am female and attracted to the opposite sex, men), which I think is an even bigger no-no in most of the Catholic traditions. And then of course someone will say then I have to change my mindset to be attracted to women. But I tried to push down the fact that I was actually the opposite sex since I was around the age eight. And I was very religious throughout my life. Then I ended up giving in and researching. Then it all made sense to me. I was indeed female. I have already ‘mutilated’ my body, if you will, by being on female hormones. And a lot of the changes are irreversible. My Catholic mother always complained at first about how I am mutilating my body, but she accepts me and still loves me. I am very thankful for that considering how many parents would disown their child in that situation.

I can honestly say that I have no intention of changing my mindset to feel male since I am completely comfortable being female inside and a woman on the outside. I realise that I will be forever born male because as a post-operative transsexual, I am only changing my body to match my real mental sex. I’m actually glad. Of course I wish I was born female, but I wasn’t. I don’t really mind. I just want to find a church where I can worship with others in a loving community. I’ve always talked to Christ and what was the answer always? “Worship me.” He didn’t ask me to do anything but worship Him. And so I will.

 

[LoyalViews]

This is an internet forum, and we can only give light advice. I really think you should contact a good priest in the diocese where you’re located. If you’re anywhere near Westminster, there’s a priest always running around somewhere in the Cathedral.

By Anglo-Catholic, what do you mean? In the Ordinariate? Or a Catholic-like Anglican? Or High Church?

 

[feverforever]

Hello Fever, God has one Church for everyone. He excludes no one from His Holy Church. Do not let your fears keep you from looking for Christ and His Church.

Is there a parish near you that you want to join? Are you looking for a Church in unison with the Pope, the Vicar of Christ?

Do you believe in the teachings of the Holy Catholic Church?

Can you make an appointment with the priest near by?

Sometimes God asks us to grow, to listen, to hear, and to reflect and pray.

May you have the strength to take this journey into the Fullness of Faith.

Peace.

Yes, I have found three churches that I like. I am not sure about looking for a Church in unison with the Pope, etc, since I have not learned much about them things yet. I have bought the Catechism of the Catholic Church and the NASB. I also have a TSB which was my grandmother’s.

Thank you.

 

[feverforever]

This is an internet forum, and we can only give light advice. I really think you should contact a good priest in the diocese where you’re located. If you’re anywhere near Westminster, there’s a priest always running around somewhere in the Cathedral.

By Anglo-Catholic, what do you mean? In the Ordinariate? Or a Catholic-like Anglican? Or High Church?

I’m not exactly sure since I have not learned much about this. But I have found several churches in my area that called themselves Anglo-Catholic and not just Anglicans.

 

[PaulinePresbytr]

Note: please don’t reply if you either don’t think that being transgender is real or if you are going to discriminate.

I am a pre-operative transsexual and haven’t changed my legal name because I am not full-time, yet. I am trying to find an Anglo-Catholic church, but I am unsure since I do not know if they will accept me or not. My birth certificate is obviously not changed yet either. I want to enter the Catholic learning course this September, but worry that I will not find a church willing to take me on because of my situation. To me personally, God gave it to me. My post-operative transsexual friend said this to me and I completely got it. I feel like this is one of my many life lessons while on earth before I go to Heaven. But, I am completely scared to death that I will be discriminated against. I have never been discriminated against so far, so I can only hope that the first church I find will accept me. It’s not like I can cover it up since I am not post-operative, my birth certificate is not changed, my legal name is not changed and my infant baptism record is of course in my male name and sex.

Has anyone got any advice on finding a church in my situation?

Thank you very much in advance.

The Church teaches that Christ came to save the world, not to condemn it. Regardless of what sins were committed in the past each person is, in Christ, a new creation. Saul of Tarsus was an anti-christian murderer, Paul of Tarsus was the Apostle to the Gentiles and author of more than half of the New Testament. Any Parish which is truly Catholic will forgive you and help you in reconciliation. Remember, if God wanted to damn us he would not have died for us on the cross.

 

[KP3243]

Oh how I wish I knew a priest like Fulton Sheen that I could have you speak with right now. I will pray that you are directed to someone that can answer all your questions and give you the guidance you are looking for.

 

[KP3243]

The Church teaches that Christ came to save the world, not to condemn it. Regardless of what sins were committed in the past each person is, in Christ, a new creation. Saul of Tarsus was an anti-christian murderer, Paul of Tarsus was the Apostle to the Gentiles and author of more than half of the New Testament. Any Parish which is truly Catholic will forgive you and help you in reconciliation. Remember, if God wanted to damn us he would not have died for us on the cross.

I would agree with this a lot of our great saints and a lot of us, were great sinners before we found the way, the light and truth in Jesus Christ in His Church. Perhaps try Confessions by Saint Augustine might be helpful to understand how this one sinner went on to become a Doctor of the Church.

 

[MaryT777]

Oh how I wish I knew a priest like Fulton Sheen that I could have you speak with right now. I will pray that you are directed to someone that can answer all your questions and give you the guidance you are looking for.

 

[feverforever]

Thank you everyone who has posted so far.
I really do want to become a Catholic since it is the only religion that is calling out to me and I relate to it so strongly - although my views have always been more liberal, even though I really dislike politics. Jesus is pushing me toward the Catholic tradition Himself. I can feel it. I can only hope and pray that I find a loving church and priest that doesn’t mind me being transsexual.

 

[jmcrae]

Note: please don’t reply if you either don’t think that being transgender is real or if you are going to discriminate.

I think your feelings are certainly real, and that you are firmly convinced that you are a woman trapped in a man’s body.

Has anyone got any advice on finding a church in my situation?

The church you go to should be one that teaches you how to accept yourself as you are, and that teaches you how to live as God created you, instead of trying to change things. There is a reason for it, and I would hate for it to be too late when you find out what the reason is.

 

[KP3243]

I guess we could ask Blessed Fulton Sheen to pray for the OP. Interesting fact about our dear friend Blessed Fulton Sheen when and I say when because I don’t think there will be an if, at least I am praying for the when but when he is declared a Saint again I am so hoping and praying for his sainthood, he would be the first native born American male saint.

 

[sw85]

Just FYI, “Anglo-Catholic” is typically used to mean “high Anglican,” i.e., an Anglicanism that more closely resembles Catholicism than, say, Episcopalianism. I suspect, though, the OP wants a Church that is in the “Anglo-Catholic tradition,” i.e., the OP wants a high liturgical church (not mere evangelical Protestantism).

To the OP, your first priority needs to be finding a church that proclaims the truth, not finding one that suits your demands/desires/lifestyle/whatever you want to call it. When I converted to Catholicism, I knew that it would present some very serious difficulties for me (having become accustomed to sexual libertinism of various sorts) but I knew that the Catholic Church represented the fullness of Christian truth and so I conformed my life to those truths, albeit with great difficulty.

If you enter a church simply because it “accepts” you then you will, essentially, have reduced religion to an ornament to your sovereign will. You will, on other words, be missing the point. So do not ask yourself “will it accept me?” but, rather, “is it true?”

 

[feverforever]

Just FYI, “Anglo-Catholic” is typically used to mean “high Anglican,” i.e., an Anglicanism that more closely resembles Catholicism than, say, Episcopalianism. I suspect, though, the OP wants a Church that is in the “Anglo-Catholic tradition,” i.e., the OP wants a high liturgical church (not mere evangelical Protestantism).

To the OP, your first priority needs to be finding a church that proclaims the truth, not finding one that suits your demands/desires/lifestyle/whatever you want to call it. When I converted to Catholicism, I knew that it would present some very serious difficulties for me (having become accustomed to sexual libertinism of various sorts) but I knew that the Catholic Church represented the fullness of Christian truth and so I conformed my life to those truths, albeit with great difficulty.

If you enter a church simply because it “accepts” you then you will, essentially, have reduced religion to an ornament to your sovereign will. You will, on other words, be missing the point. So do not ask yourself “will it accept me?” but, rather, “is it true?”

But I feel that being accepted is also a consideration in picking the church for me. I do need a priest that will accept me. But, like you said, I need a Church that is true. At the end of the day, if it is a true Catholic church and if the priest accepts me whole-heartedly, then I will more than gladly join.

 

[Lisa1967]

Note: please don’t reply if you either don’t think that being transgender is real or if you are going to discriminate.

I am a pre-operative transsexual and haven’t changed my legal name because I am not full-time, yet. I am trying to find an Anglo-Catholic church, but I am unsure since I do not know if they will accept me or not. My birth certificate is obviously not changed yet either. I want to enter the Catholic learning course this September, but worry that I will not find a church willing to take me on because of my situation. To me personally, God gave it to me. My post-operative transsexual friend said this to me and I completely got it. I feel like this is one of my many life lessons while on earth before I go to Heaven. But, I am completely scared to death that I will be discriminated against. I have never been discriminated against so far, so I can only hope that the first church I find will accept me. It’s not like I can cover it up since I am not post-operative, my birth certificate is not changed, my legal name is not changed and my infant baptism record is of course in my male name and sex.

Has anyone got any advice on finding a church in my situation?

Thank you very much in advance.

I do not know if this church operates in the UK, but you might want to google the Metropolitan Community Church (MCC). The church has a special ministry to GLBT folk but all are welcome. The church was founded by Troy Perry in 1968 when other Christian churches would not accept GLBT people. They are not Anglo-Catholic per se but the one I belonged to in Albuquerque, NM had a lot of Catholics. If you want more information, feel free to send me a private message and I’d be happy to chat.

 

[feverforever]

I do not know if this church operates in the UK, but you might want to google the Metropolitan Community Church (MCC). The church has a special ministry to GLBT folk but all are welcome. The church was founded by Troy Perry in 1968 when other Christian churches would not accept GLBT people. They are not Anglo-Catholic per se but the one I belonged to in Albuquerque, NM had a lot of Catholics. If you want more information, feel free to send me a private message and I’d be happy to chat.

I looked it up and found it was a protestant church . I am not actually looking for a GLBT church, but just a Catholic church with an accepting priest. There is one in my city, but is not a church but just a centre to talk.