How to forgive James Holmes

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My heart goes out to those who lost friends and relatives, and those who are suffering the acts of insanity that occurred in Aurora, CO. I have been praying for those who are grieving, and I grieve. I was angry, too, looking for someone, some cause, some influence, some aspect of human nature that I can find at fault for such a horrendous thing to happen.

Is it time to forgive yet? Maybe not for some/most of us. I am ready to start. Of course, it is easier for me because the loss of life and limb does not affect me directly, I have no friends or relatives among those killed and injured. But all of us, at some time, even those who lost sons and daughters, will have to either choose to hang onto resentment and anger or to choose to forgive.

I don’t know James Holmes story. Apparently, 13 or so years ago he lived in our county here in California, and those who knew him as a young person say he was well-liked and very motivated in school. Quiet, but athletic, and a joiner, not a loner. He was an 11 year old kid.

It is obvious, though, that the young man developed a blindness to the goodness, the love, and the value of what it is to be human. On the other hand, he may have never developed a natural empathy, that the only thing that kept him from doing harm before was his own fear of consequence. In either case, he set out to destroy, and in his own eyes what he destroyed was insignificant, worthless. Such is the mindset necessary to carry out such acts. Undoubtedly, his own need for power, status, or control played a part in his motivation, and we all have those parts of ourselves with which to reconcile.

Is it, perhaps, inherent in the depiction of the universe in terms of Power of Good vs. Power of Evil (the Star Wars theology), we set the premise that there is some part of humanity that we can justifiably destroy? Is violence so prevalent in our society because conflict resolution in all our media and foreign policy and even talk-show radio is solved by the gun barrel and bullying rather than reconciliation? Is it time for a new agenda?
 
Christ forgave the men nailing him to the cross. He did not wait to forgive. Neither should we.
 
sllhouette said:
Christ forgave the men nailing him to the cross. He did not wait to forgive. Neither should we.
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I agree. I have already forgiven him. My heart goes out to him. I don’t know what happened to drive him to this. I pray for him as much as I pray for the victoms and their families.
 
Well, it’s not a matter of forgiving the person.

Christ can forgive our sins if we repent (forgiveness is not “automatic”, that would be a Protestant belief).

What we have to think about is that what we condemn is the act, the evil actions, the choice to commit them. Those things are evil. Those things are sins. Repentance is the only way for God to forgive them.

But the man? The soul that gives him life? What do we need to forgive about them? God made man and He saw it was very good. He made the soul in His image and likeness. Period.

A man sins? His sins are despicable and the acts are to be hated and despised. Repentance and forgiveness of sins are between God and the sinner. We have nothing to do, other than pray for the good of souls, and it is not up to us to judge and condemn, which means neither to judge a person as good, nor to judge a person as bad. We leave every judgment to our Beloved, and pray indiscriminately for all sinners, that is, for all of us.
 
sllhouette said:
Christ forgave the men nailing him to the cross. He did not wait to forgive. Neither should we.
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The man was repentant.

The other man on the cross was not, and we don’t know if he was forgiven or not.

In the case of Holmes, it’s difficult.

Part of me says, he needs forgiveness, but the other part of me says, he should’ve already faced execution.

It’s a conflict of the heart I know and it’s a struggle I’ve dealt with all of my life.

I pray for the victims and their families, and I also pray for Holmes’ family, who are also suffering.

I guess right now, I just pray for that the Lord give us wisdom enough to know how to bring compassion and justice to the victims in His way.

Jim
 
JimR-OCDS said:
The man was repentant.

The other man on the cross was not, and we don’t know if he was forgiven or not.

In the case of Holmes, it’s difficult.

Part of me says, he needs forgiveness, but the other part of me says, he should’ve already faced execution.

It’s a conflict of the heart I know and it’s a struggle I’ve dealt with all of my life.

I pray for the victims and their families, and I also pray for Holmes’ family, who are also suffering.

I guess right now, I just pray for that the Lord give us wisdom enough to know how to bring compassion and justice to the victims in His way.

Jim
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I was talking about the men nailing him, not the men hanging with him.

One must distinguish forgiveness and reconciliation. Although we forgive James, we can not feign a reconciliation that does not exist. Reconciliation requires repentance, Forgiveness does not and necessarily must precede reconciliation.

No one deserves execution. I don’t care what they have done. The only justification for the death penalty is that it may be needed to protect the innocent. In this case, I don’t know if that is justified.
 
JimR-OCDS said:
Part of me says, he needs forgiveness, but the other part of me says, he should’ve already faced execution.
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Well, those two statements are not contradicting one another. They could both be true, or maybe the second one is false.

If the law of men condemns him to death, is God bound to man’s judgment?

Will execution accomplish anything from the spiritual standpoint?

As for his need for forgiveness, that’s rather clear…without forgiveness, he is already dead, even if he lives for many more years. But that is between the Divine Judge and the soul.
 
My opinion is that I have suffered no loss at the hands of James Holmes, therefore it is not my place to forgive him. Only the person who has suffered damages has the right of forgiveness. We, as consumers of the media, have no right to offer forgiveness on behalf of those directly affected.

His acts were despicable and vile and I have every right to abhor what he did, but I have no right to offer him forgiveness.

I personally think he was acting either in response to a psychotic episode or as a result of a drug-induced episode, but of course I won’t know until the investigators decide to share that information with the public. I pray for him and his poor family, for the innocent victims and their families. What a horrible, horrible thing for them all to suffer through.
 
For many, forgiveness is a difficult virtue to master. When we learn the power and wisdom of forgiveness, we are bound to have reached an advanced level of spiritual maturity. Regardless the nature of any possible abuse that we may have endured, nor the severity of that abuse, full recovery from abuse cannot be achieved until we truly forgive our abuser(s). Any anger or resentment we hold within us, live and thrive within us, and become a part of our very self. We will never rid ourselves of this anger and resentment until we experience true forgiveness towards all. Seeing our tormentors suffer a thousand times over will only add to our own misery.
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On the other hand, to endure unnecessary torment and misery is never righteous, but a perversion.  Also, the righteousness of forgiveness should never involve our condoning abuse or any other forms of evil.

True forgiveness requires our valuing peace and love above all else.  Experiencing forgiveness towards those who have wronged us resembles perfect love more so than perhaps any other human experience.  Forgiveness involves recognizing and valuing the potential for love that exists within every human soul, including our own soul.  Sins cannot be completely forgiven until we forgive, and find an inner peace with, everyone who has ever wronged us;  for every ounce of anger and resentment that we hold against any other(s), there will surely exist an ounce of sin held against us -- for harboring anger and resentment within our self is sin.

The Golden Rule states, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you!"  Our forgiving everyone, especially those we consider our enemies or adversaries, is to demonstrate to God that we are worthy of His forgiveness.  Likewise, to find love for all our enemies and adversaries is to demonstrate to God that we have suffered long enough with our hatred, and we are ready to receive His love.

Again, to experience the true power and wisdom contained within the virtue of forgiveness is to develop great spiritual growth!
 
R_C said:
Well, those two statements are not contradicting one another. They could both be true, or maybe the second one is false.

If the law of men condemns him to death, is God bound to man’s judgment?

Will execution accomplish anything from the spiritual standpoint?

As for his need for forgiveness, that’s rather clear…without forgiveness, he is already dead, even if he lives for many more years. But that is between the Divine Judge and the soul.
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We can not be pro-life and pro-death. This is one of the more difficult things for me as well, but we can not rail against those who would murder children and then cry out for the death of adults.
 
TheDoors said:
We can not be pro-life and pro-death. This is one of the more difficult things for me as well, but we can not rail against those who would murder children and then cry out for the death of adults.
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But to forgive someone is not equivalent to being pro-life.

The Catechism explains very clearly the position of the Church on death penalty. And as far as I can tell, it is neither pro-life, nor pro-death (though those definitions are rather vague, since of course the Church is exclusively pro-life!).

Abortion is an entirely different issue, as far as I can tell. The Church stands united against abortion no matter what.
 
mynamesjoe said:
Forgiveness is more than saying “i forgive you” and forgetting the act. I refer the rest of my reply to a man who is more qualified and knowledgeable on this

youtube.com/watch?v=eY8CffVn5Sk

:knight2:
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Thanks for adding the link here. And thanks to all who responded, all of your comments help in working through this.

One person commented that we do not have the “right” to forgive. There is no scriptural basis for this. It is indeed our call to forgive all those who trespass against us. The “us” includes everyone we care about, be they the unborn, those on death row, everyone we love. And, since the gospel calls us to love everyone, then forgiveness is a calling in all cases.
 
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