How to Forgive?

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Montie_Claunch

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I am having a hard time forgiving somone. Does anyone have any suggestions or refrence material that could help me on this journey to let go? Thanks and God bless.
 
I meant to write “Forgive” in the Title. I just noticed it and it is to late to edit. Please forgive the blunder on my part.
 
In the Our Father it says that we should forgive others in whatever way we wish to be forgiven of our wrongs.
 
Montie, have you talked to Father Paul about it? I’m sure he has great insight that could help you.

There’s a priest at St. Elizabeth Hospital, Father Jerome, that is wonderful at counseling. I recently did an ACTS retreat with him, and the people coming out of confession were just raving about him. You may want to drop in and talk to him sometime.
 
cheeto1 said:
In the Our Father it says that we should forgive others in whatever way we wish to be forgiven of our wrongs.
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I seem to be able to forgive. But I can’t forget somethings that have been done. I forgive someone for not meeting me at a certain time and place, but I can’t forget. So, I hesitate to make another meeting with that person (I had someone stand me up three times). I also forgive someone for taking a long time to pay me back money, but I can’t forget so I don’t loan them any more money.

I think the forgiving part is easy. To hold a grudge against somebody doesn’t make me feel any better. I can’t put myself in a vulnerable position to let that person do wrong. Is there a line between forgiving and forgetting? I used to think it was a cop out to say, “I can forgive, but not forget”. I don’t know if this line of thinking is right or wrong.
 
Oblaidon said:
I seem to be able to forgive. But I can’t forget somethings that have been done. I forgive someone for not meeting me at a certain time and place, but I can’t forget. So, I hesitate to make another meeting with that person (I had someone stand me up three times). I also forgive someone for taking a long time to pay me back money, but I can’t forget so I don’t loan them any more money.

I think the forgiving part is easy. To hold a grudge against somebody doesn’t make me feel any better. I can’t put myself in a vulnerable position to let that person do wrong. Is there a line between forgiving and forgetting? I used to think it was a cop out to say, “I can forgive, but not forget”. I don’t know if this line of thinking is right or wrong.
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i think what you are doing is right… you should not put yourself in a position to be hurt again… i know that i help out a lot of people but if they hurt me in return, i do not hold a grudge but i will not help them out again.
like they say, trust once lost has to be gained again.
 
Forgiving is a lot easier than healing the wounds that were inflicted. Through prayer and time these will heal. A good thing to reflect on is how our transgressions have caused wounds to others, and although they may have forgiven us, their wounds also take time to heal.

It should be a red flag for us to think about the harm we do, when we hurt other people.

Jim
 
cheeto1 said:
In the Our Father it says that we should forgive others in whatever way we wish to be forgiven of our wrongs.
Click to expand...
Exactly. That is why I really want to work hard on forgiving this person. But, I need a little help and advice. I am having a hard time with it. Some times I forgive the person that I get just so irrate at them and have to rework the thing all of over again.
 
Montie_Claunch said:
Exactly. That is why I really want to work hard on forgiving this person. But, I need a little help and advice. I am having a hard time with it. Some times I forgive the person that I get just so irrate at them and have to rework the thing all of over again.
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it is ok if you get irate and have to rework the thing all over again… like it has been mentioned in the Bible - “The Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak”…

i am sure He looks at your struggle and loves you all the more for it… just keep offering it up to the Lord.
 
First of all, forgiveness is a decision, and one you may need to make numerous times. Second, forgiveness is not saying that the person shouldn’t be held accountable for his deeds. We’re not saying, “What you did was OK.” We’re saying, “I will not allow you to continue to victimize me any more. I will let go of this hurt and anger and resentment.” So, forgiveness is about us, not them. Third, God asks us to forgive others as He forgives us. If we hope for God’s forgiveness, then we must learn to forgive others for God’s sake.

Peace,
Linda
 
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