How to Get Over My "Mariaphobia"?

[anjoh66]

Greetings everyone!

I’m a recent convert to the Catholic Church (received on Easter of this year), from Mormonism and am having a hard time getting used to Marian devotions. I’m already comfortable with the Rosary, and I believe I owe much of my conversion to our Blessed Lady’s intercession as I began praying the Rosary before having ever stepped foot in a Catholic church. I think the Rosary helped as a “stepping stone” (if you will). Though it’s an obvious Marian devotion, the fact that all the prayers are Bible-based made it easy for me to pursue it despite my anti-Marian upbringing.

The statues, icons, and Marian chapels at church, however, are another story. I’m still a little uncomfortable genuflecting, bowing, or kneeling in front of Marian icons/statues/etc. I know its nothing but a cultural anxiety I’m feeling having come from a religious tradition that essentially lambasted Catholicism for perceived “idolatry”. Though I know its not the intent of such devotions to place Mary on a pedestal higher than Christ himself, I can’t help but sometimes feel that I’m “robbing” Christ of worship due to him even though I already know that the veneration of Christ’s Saints especially his blessed mother indirectly venerates God.

Any advice or tips you can offer to help me get over this irrational angst?

This is one of the reasons i propagate for longer catechumenate, it is never good when a person is baptised or converted too quickly, it should pass at least 2 years so they get familiar with the teachings of the catholic church to awoid misunderstandings and get more time to investigate the things themselves.

The importance should not be on running gauntlet to easter vigil for getting baptised, also the catechumens should be informed that they are already a part of christs body when they accepted the faith, that is not something that is happening at easter vigil.

Also there is no demand that you must follow all the marian devotion, but a longer catechumenate would have cleared it up what it really means.

 

[5254rrn]

Jesus Christ is still the only intercessor between God and Man. We use the saints as a source for intercessory prayer, “When two or more of you pray together I am with you” Matt 18. We choose to pray with the saints not to them! Since they are in heaven, we know they worship at the throne of Christ. Why not use them as a prayer partner? They are closer to God and they will make a better prayer partner than anyone here on earth. While we are on the subject of finding prayer partners. Can you ever find a better prayer partner than Jesus’ mother? Do you think Jesus answers her prayers? Praying with the saints is a gift. The practice has always been with the Catholic Church. Who ever gave the protestant reformers authority to question and change this Tradition in the Catholic Church? Keep praying that Rosary, you can not find a better prayer partner than Mary.

God bless

 

[beckycmarie]

A friend of mine had a similar problem when he converted, and included it in an essay on obedience. Thought you might find his words helpful:

I have found obedience to be a salvation. Two examples:

My Conversion to the Catholic Church: When I finally sat down and took a look at Scripture honestly (and literally) I found that it was the Catholic Church, not the Baptist Church who truly interpreted Scripture literally. (i.e., the Real Presence, the Chair of Peter). When I looked at history I found that, too, the Catholics were right after all. When confronted with these Truths, I had a decision to make. Either obey Truth, or follow delusion—either become Catholic, or remain Protestant. I obeyed the Truth even though I didn’t understand it all.

My devotion to Mary: Although I was convinced of the authority of the Church, the Real Presence, and all, I was not so convinced about the communion of the saints and the doctrine on Mary. That took a little while longer. But since I knew that the Church had the AUTHORITY to declare these doctrines, I simply OBEYED.
Was my “belief” from the heart? No. Did I “feel” the devotion to Mary? No. I merely obeyed the Church and believed in the doctrine of Mary and the communion of the saints out of shear cold obedience.

But then something odd happened. Almost immediately after I obeyed the Church on this and submitted my mind and will to the Church’s teachings, all of a sudden, I began to understand the doctrine. It was almost like magic. I began to “know” what these doctrines were about. In short order I found myself no longer obeying in cold submission, but in understanding also. I had come to understand and to agree with the doctrine through the reason of my mind.

Still, something was missing—the devotion of my heart. Within one month after the cold obedience, followed by the revelation of intellect given to me to understand (only after the obedience), finally came an understanding of the heart.

From Obedience: The First and Foundational Virtue

 

[TJ_2582]

Jesus Christ is still the only intercessor between God and Man. We use the saints as a source for intercessory prayer, “When two or more of you pray together I am with you” Matt 18. We choose to pray with the saints not to them! Since they are in heaven, we know they worship at the throne of Christ. Why not use them as a prayer partner? They are closer to God and they will make a better prayer partner than anyone here on earth. While we are on the subject of finding prayer partners. Can you ever find a better prayer partner than Jesus’ mother? Do you think Jesus answers her prayers? Praying with the saints is a gift. The practice has always been with the Catholic Church. Who ever gave the protestant reformers authority to question and change this Tradition in the Catholic Church? Keep praying that Rosary, you can not find a better prayer partner than Mary.

God bless

Well said 52:thumbsup:

You definitely can’t get a better prayer partner than Mary. I once came across a post on another thread where someone said that when you pray the Rosary it’s like you’re holding Mary’s hand and looking at Jesus. I thought that was a really cool way of putting it. Whatever angst you’re going through right now, the Rosary can only help you get through it(and probably quicker than alot of things).

BTW, your angst isn’t irrational Even if you understand things, it’s only natural to feel that way when you come from a religion that’s so much against what we teach on certain things. So just give it time…you’ll get over it soon enough And welcome home!

 

[valient_Lucy]

Greetings everyone!

I’m a recent convert to the Catholic Church (received on Easter of this year), from Mormonism and am having a hard time getting used to Marian devotions. I’m already comfortable with the Rosary, and I believe I owe much of my conversion to our Blessed Lady’s intercession as I began praying the Rosary before having ever stepped foot in a Catholic church. I think the Rosary helped as a “stepping stone” (if you will). Though it’s an obvious Marian devotion, the fact that all the prayers are Bible-based made it easy for me to pursue it despite my anti-Marian upbringing.

The statues, icons, and Marian chapels at church, however, are another story. I’m still a little uncomfortable genuflecting, bowing, or kneeling in front of Marian icons/statues/etc. I know its nothing but a cultural anxiety I’m feeling having come from a religious tradition that essentially lambasted Catholicism for perceived “idolatry”. Though I know its not the intent of such devotions to place Mary on a pedestal higher than Christ himself, I can’t help but sometimes feel that I’m “robbing” Christ of worship due to him even though I already know that the veneration of Christ’s Saints especially his blessed mother indirectly venerates God.

Any advice or tips you can offer to help me get over this irrational angst?

First of all, welcome home!

As for the statues, icons, and chapels, some thoughts.
1 Catholics bow to the altar, and genuflect to the tabernacle. There’s no obligation to bow or genuflect to a statue. Many people kneel before a statue to pray, but we don’t have to kneel to pray, so feel free to stand by the statue and pray.

2 Do what you feel comfortable doing around the chapel or statue. You don’t have to force yourself to do something you feel uncomfortable doing. Don’t be too upset with yourself.

3 Pray. Talk to Jesus (especially before the Blessed Sacrament) about your discomfort.

 

[Trishie]

Welcome to the Church!

By the way, we only genuflect to God

It’s always been my custom to pray primarily to God. Years ago, I said to Jesus in my mind, “I know You love Your mother. Please help me to know how to approach her.” He official bithday was in a few days, and I wanted Him to help me with a gift for her. When the day came and I felt He’d given me nothing, I said to her sadly. “I have nothing to give you, only myself.” Later during the day I sat at the kitchen table to write a family letter…which didn’t get written because I simply wrote two prayers one after the other. The first was:

Woman of faith, pray for us

Dear Mother Mary, you have been honoured, blessed, and gifted by God. You are our mother because in figure of John, Jesus gave us to you as your children as He hung dying on the cross. We ask you to speak to God on our behalf.

It was through your faith that Jesus first manifested His power at Cana, thus beginning His work before the appointed time. Although it concerned neither life nor death, nor eternal salvation but the human feelings of others, He granted your trusting prayer. Such was your faith, and God’s love for you, Saint of all saints!

Therefore, we trust our prayer to Your faith in God!

You see everything that we need in service of God, and all that we desire for each other. You feel the aching of our hearts and hear our longing prayers. You behold our faith, our repentance, and our love.

Stand not silently by, Mother! Our Father!

Your Son, and the Holy Spirit who overshadowed you and blessed you with our Saviour—They cannot refuse you!

Please give us your unfailing intercession before God so that the fullest gifts and blessings are granted to each of us. We stand humbly before you, Mother, and entreat you with our hearts, minds, and spirits…Mother! April 1980

Next morning I read the prayer and cried like a child, curled up on my bed.

I guess Jesus gave me her gift. The second prayer He gave made absolutely no mention of her. Was it for her the true gift, a gift for her Son?

I should post it separately as otherwise the post is too long.

Warm regards, Trishie

 

[Trishie]

**
This was the other prayer. I didn’t set out to write it, but I saw it as fitting, that I wrote it, felt impelled to write it on her birthday that day…because she directs us to God, just as she did at Cana, “Do whatever He tells you.”**

Reparation through suffering

God of all peoples, please receive from all ages the sufferings of the innocent and the contrite, in reparation for the sins of the guilty!

Behold—
the bereaved and the deserted…the hopeless and the despairing…the displaced and the poverty-stricken…the injured and the physically sick…the mentally and the emotionally ill…the retarded and the incapacitated…the frustrated and the afraid…the isolated and the elderly…the addicted, the imprisoned and the persecuted. Behold those young, to old, sinned against by injustice, misunderstanding, abuse and neglect…those whose hearts this world has broken…those crushed by remorse and racked by misery and sin…those with lives empty of purpose—
all persons with suffering within or with suffering imposed from an external source!

Please receive their pain, grief and loneliness, their weariness, anxiety or desperation—in conjunction with the spiritual, mental and physical anguish of Your Son, as reparation for all the sins of humankind.

Our God, through Your love of Jesus, please bless and welcome the sufferers! Hold them gently in Your arms and comfort them. Heal them, claim them, and fill them with Your life and peace.

Please accept all the undirected suffering of those who do not know God. Receive this suffering in atonement for all offences against You and any person. Allow Your mercy, compassion and power to release humankind from bondage to sin, suffering, and death.
You grant me compassion to desire to bring their pain to Your redeeming grace.

Therefore, gather their tears, those fallen and those unshed. Draw them up into yourself through the sun of divine love, to purify them as a rain of mercy to fall upon the parched souls of humankind. Thus, we may grow in Your love and the earth may be filled with life and fruitfulness pleasing to Your divine purposes.

Our God, out of all the cries and moans and tears, hidden or revealed, from earth’s beginning, please hear our prayer. Joined as one with Your Son we all cry out—“My God, my God, why have You abandoned me?” Of those who torment and those who pass by uncaring and unseeing, we say—“Father, forgive them. They know not what they do and fail to do!” With Him we then cry trustingly—“Father, into Your hands I commit my spirit!”

Our God, please listen to our prayer, in union with Your beloved Son whom You raised from death to everlasting glory and joy. In Him who bore all humankind’s sins, please receive all suffering, struggle and sorrow that sin has brought upon our race.

Anything separated from God is meaningless, but in God, all becomes renewed and holy. Please accept from Jesus’ hands the suffering of every person throughout time, held within His own redemptive suffering. This that the whole price of atonement is met, and harmony is restored to Creation in the eternal triumph of Your Kingdom. Thank You, God of our redemption! September 8, 1980

Do you get what I mean? I’ll share some of the prayers I wrote to Mary over time, as each of them involves profound feeling, and each shows, I guess, her realation to God and to us.
I figure it could be some kind of training wheels for you to feel more comfortable with her place in your life.

Oh, yes of course I cried with this one. And with the subsequent ones, because in me at least they touch a deep chord…I still pray primarily to the Lord, but do love the Mother.

 

[Trishie]

Woman, behold your Child

Dear Mother, please intercede with the Father that I may grow in worthy fraternity with Jesus, for this kinship was His dying wish. So deep was this astonishing desire, that He bridged earth to heaven for me by the racked sufferings of His soul, mind, and body.

As His humanity strained to shattering point, He knew even then my sins and faults, which He understood and forgave even as He suffered. He knew that I do not comprehend the heinousness of offence against God or against others whom He lovingly created. He knew that I could not grasp the greatness of His act of incarnation and immolation, of His redemption of us, of me. For selfishness and worldliness dims the human soul’s limited perception regarding truth and love.

He, this suffering Being subject to all human vicissitude and weakness, was aware—with pain that deepened His own—of the anguish that filled your being and drenched your face with unconscious tears of love and distress as He died for me. He knew the depth of your pain—poignant with memories of the best of sons, of the greatest of men—loving, wise and innocent, compassionate, beloved, and vibrantly human.

Disfigured beyond recognition, He died for me in apparent failure and disgrace, yet He still asked your maternal love for me, inviting me to loving fraternity. Your love, transcending all, accepted me wholly.

Lovely Lady, pure crystal of divine glory, I humbly slip my hand in yours with obedient trust. I feel unworthy, sinful, wondering and hopeful. Why has He, this wonderful, promising, intelligent young man allowed Himself to be degraded and destroyed, emptied in loving endurance that escalates throughout indescribable torment—piercing your soul?

Why has He done this for one such as me, who am so insignificant and sinful! Yet He draws me into His household and gives me His own Mother and His divine Father.

Gentle Mother, most blessed, you were chosen from amongst all women to cooperate in the incarnation of the only begotten of the most high God! You were entrusted with His nurture, His moulding and protection from conception until the beginning of His public ministry. Now your suffering eyes are filled with love and pity that calm the shame, confusion and discouragement that might otherwise overwhelm me.

Mother, intercede that what He has done, and all that He promises, be fulfilled in me and in everyone for whom I pray. Please lead me to love your Son and our God as He has loved and to cherish others with such love. Lead me to give my paltry all to Him in humble, obedient, creative service.

Let this small gift be blessed in your maternal love for me and in the intercession of the entire heavenly household. Thus may I live for His glory, offering atonement, gratitude and petition for us poor sinners—so that His joy and delight in me, and yours, is as great as His suffering for me, and yours.

Mother as gift to Him for such undeserved love, please obtain of the Father, that whenever Jesus looks upon me He knows only gladness, finding in me for Himself…the pleasure of an innocent child…the love and nurture of Nazareth with you…the intimacy and repose of a perfect Bethany. Let Him know with thrilled awareness, that His blood and torment, and your tears, are not wasted to me nor to souls whom His salvation reaches through me. September 29, 1981

 

[Trishie]

The grieving heart

Dear Mother Mary, please comfort each grieving heart in the waves of pain that frequently engulf it. Sustain it when dark mourning closes out all light of comfort and hope , and when prayer seems no longer possible. Obtain the gentle understanding and warm companionship of others to nurture the stricken heart and lead it towards hope and new life. Sustain it with faith and bring it to true generosity of spirit even in its sorrow.

You deeply experienced the laceration of suffering and bereavement, Mother. It entered and filled your Son’s life, piercing your soul, echoing through all your years. You watched your beloved Child follow a path that led to His earthly annihilation. Grieving, you were powerless to murmur or to prevent Him who must be about His divine Father’s affairs. You suffered, prayed, and loved in silent faith, as so many parents must.

Like innumerable mothers throughout the ages, you watched with anguish the struggling progress of your Son’s destiny, amid rising danger of circumstance and others’ opposition. Finally, you beheld as others’ selfishness, unbelief, ambition, fear and pride, destroyed Him who only loved them and sought their salvation.

He hung there, your boy, cruelly nailed, struggling for breath and faith. You helplessly watched life drain from His pure, loved body as His struggle deepened in pain, fever and weakness. You would have protected Him whom you loved in excruciating intensity, but you could never choose to betray the divine intention that entrusted Him to you. “Your will be done!” your being replied endlessly with His to the divine Father.

Have pity on the anguished helplessness issuing from inability to alleviate the sufferings of dear ones. Mother crucified of heart, as we suffer with our dear ones’ pain and grief, please obtain for us such courage, obedience and selflessness as your own and His, so that the highest will of divine love shall be fulfilled in each of our lives.

Mother have pity on that terrible grief, that chasm of loss, the emptiness that stretches before the bereaved as they embrace their dead in their desolate hearts, as you have done. Let them find hope in Your dead son’s resurrection even when their hearts are still frozen with grief.

Thank you, dear Mother. 1981

Maybe my stuff won’t speak to you, or maybe it will give someone else’s perspectives as kind of ‘training wheels’ for you to see Mary’s place through another’s eyes.

 

[Trishie]

The following was a kind of overall picture i put at the beginning of my section on "Mary, Woman of Faith

2.14 Mary, woman of faith

When humankind first sinned against our Creator, God immediately condemned the tempter, saying, “*** I will make you enemies of each other: you and the woman, your offspring and her offspring. It will crush your head***.” [Genesis 3:15] Mary, whom Jesus made mother of all persons from the cross, [John 19:26-27] please, with the Angels, fight the ancient enemy in our lives, for sake of the redemption that your Son won for us.

You were obedient: “I am the handmaid of the Lord, let what you have said is done to me..” [Luke 1:38]

You were unselfish and kind. Although yourself pregnant, you hurried to assist your older cousin in her pregnancy as soon as Gabriel informed you of it. God rewarded your faith and love by allowing the Spirit to speak to through Elizabeth:
“Of all women you are the most blessed, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. Why should I be honoured by a visit from the mother of my Lord? For the moment that your greeting reached my ears, the child in my womb leapt for joy. Yes, blessed is she who believed that the promise made her by the Lord would be fulfilled.” [Luke 1:39-45]

In you, the Spirit responded,
“My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord
and my spirit exults in God my saviour;
because He has looked upon His lowly handmaid.
Yes, from this day forward all generations will call me blessed,
for the Almighty has done great things for me. Holy is His name,
and His mercy reaches from age to age for those who fear him.
He has shown the power of His arm, He has routed the proud of heart.
He has pulled down princes from their thrones and exalted the lowly.
The hungry He has filled with good things, the rich sent empty away.
He has come to the help of Israel his servant, mindful of His mercy
—according to the promises He made to our ancestors—
of His mercy to Abraham and to his descendants forever.” [Luke 1:46-79]

Mary, you rejoiced for the blessing given to you, and for those given to all persons through the Child whom you carried in your womb—for we also are descendants of Abraham, by faith. [Romans 4:12] You, in this loving concern for others, interceded for their needs even while on earth, exhorting them to obedient faith like your own, “do whatever He tells you”. He initially reproved you—“My hour is not yet come.” [John 2:4, 5] However, He granted your humble request.

Woman of faith, although your life held many perplexities and seeming inconsistencies, you treasured and pondered these brief manifestations of divine action in your Son’s life without losing your humble trust. [Luke 2:19-20] For it might have seemed that God could make better arrangements for the conditions of His divine Son’s birth!

When you heard of the terrible slaughter of the innocent infants, intended to include Jesus, this massacre devastated your maternal heart on behalf of those other mothers. You might have said, “How can God allow this?” When you fled as a refugee with all the grief, displacement and destitution that refugee families may suffer you still kept faith. Again, you trusted, as He hung dying horribly wounded and humiliated upon a criminal’s cross.

Mary, we thank you for your care of that incomparable Child, whose coming was foretold centuries before. We thank you—for the Child whom you bore and nurtured is Saviour of all humankind! Thank you for your faith, for your obedience, for your faithfulness through all those years when the extraordinary promise made to you might have seemed lost in daily routine.

My focus was to hopefully help achieve getting your emotions aligned with your reason!
Okay, I’ve done my best.
We all have. I hope we’ve helped.
I’ll keep you in prayer. God bless

 

[Pax_Vobiscum_57]

[SIGN]WELCOME HOME!!![/SIGN]

I’m a cradle Catholic revert, and the rosary was hard for me, too. Not everyone has a Marian heart, so don’t feel intimidated by it. I have a very special relationship with the Blessed Mother, but it didn’t happen overnight. Not even over months. Don’t beat yourself up for not feeling called to pray the rosary. We all have different charisms; different devotions.

 

[Cluny]

Mariology, the true doctrines concerning the Theotokos (as opposed to the warped versions so popularly believed), is properly an extension, or subset, of Christology.

And approved and traditional Marian devotions are about who JESUS is.

Even the very word THEOTOKOS/Mother of God is really about the relationship between the divine and human natures in Jesus Christ.

Does this help?