How to handle Protestant in-laws?

[felsguy]

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It is definitely not our wishes to have a huge blowup with the in-laws and we want to be as charitable as possible as to make our lives and our children’s lives as stress-free as possible. To this end, we still plan on attending Christmas Eve services and the like with our in-laws in addition to our mass obligations.

But, maybe this ignorance is good in that one day, when she does ask us a question, we can give her information that may open her eyes. She does crave spiritual experiences so I’m hoping that the lives of the saints and the miracles of the Catholic Church will appeal to her. I actually think she’d enjoy praying the rosary, if she understood it.

I think you are taking a very prudent approach here, keeping the door open and not escalating things. A little deflection as opposed to confronation can be useful sometimes, granted not always,

such as:

“I’m not upset that you are going to church there, but I’d probably rather you not. I don’t think it matters where you go to church as long as you are praying, reading your Bible, and love the Lord.”

“Glad to know you’re praying and reading your Bible, Mom. Anyhow, how’s your day going? What’s dad up to? Are we still planning to get together Saturday, etc.etc.”

or

probably best not allow this for now, especially since my girls are still young and don’t quite understand the Mass yet, or the significance of it.

maybe rephrased slightly along the lines of “Not right now but thanks. We think it might confuse the girls. Perhaps when they’re a lttle older…like 30 or 40 maybe” Well, probably best just to think and not say that last part out loud.

As Saint Davy of Crockett (you young’uns may have to google him) always said *“Be sure you’re right, then go ahead.” *

 

[Kelfa28]

I have a Protestant MIL.

This is something my husband handled immediately upon his conversion to Catholicism. So, this is more from him then me.

He told her almost immediately that the reason why he was converting was because he knew that Catholicism was the one true faith. He wasn’t just switching denominations but was converting to Catholicism because it was the Truth…based on history and the Church Fathers.

I know she has tried a couple of times to intersect. She insisted that we get married immediately in front of a Judge when she found out that we were expecting a child around the time we got engaged.

We told her we couldn’t do that and had to explain that it wouldn’t be a valid marriage until we got married in the Church and we’d still be sinning.

She couldn’t understand the need for us to baptize our daughters right away.
She couldn’t understand why we would turn down invites for her Church services just because she would be kind enough to attend ours.
She was a little bit taken aback when we told her we were expecting our third baby so soon after our first two…despite the fact that we were both unemployed (“you can’t use anything?”)

Each and every time we explained to her what the Church taught and why and that we believed it with all of our hearts because we knew it was the Truth.

My advice?
Tell her what you believe and why.
Become well-versed in what you believe and why.
Do not compromise. So, no the kids absolutely cannot attend those services.
Do not let her undermine your parenting authority. Ever.

This is your family and these are your kids….not hers. If you choose to practice Catholicism then she needs to respect that and not undermine you authority.