How to judge what just happened

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spirocatania

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i have two problems.

i had a impure thought and which started from an attraction or just looking at someone. and i found myself liking it and i cannot say that i didn’t know what i was doing i may have know. it was brief and i relized what i was doin and said sorry lord but then i prayed telling him that i am confused because i dont know how to judge what just happened.

i get confused when it comes to sins with the mind. i always say since it was short and I didn’t continue it then no mortal sin was commit but i am never sure.

also

impurty also start or I start it due to weakness. I get alot of brief images in my mind. i cdould look at a lady,sence a image is coming, the moving image is in my head doing stuff for one of two seconds then its over/ i get annoyed because they happen alot. Sometime all day.

how do i judge both of these everyweek i get cionfesued, every week i dont know if i should or should have holy communion.
 
I think the key here is whether or not you are putting up a fight or road block to these mental images. Deliberate consent with full knowledge is was it takes for it to be mortal and in this case willfully entertaining these thoughts for pleasure. You are also wondering how much time the thoughts stayed in your mind for it to be considered sin. That’s your own judgement.
 
discuss these matters with your confessor. He is the one who should know you the best and be able to give you the best advice for your particular situation.

Based soley on what you have written I think that sin is involved but it is not Mortal sin. The very fact that you are asking about this indicates that you are not embracing these thoughts (full consent of the will) and that you are fighting against them.
However, based on the frequency of thier occurring it appears you need to “beef up” your spiritual life - more prayer time, more frequent confession, more frequent communion, more time before the blessed sacrament etc…
Also seek to become active in works of charity, be they large or small, around your parish or in your community.
These types of sneaky demons are best expunged by more active prayer and by practicing acts of virtue, even little ones, and practiced often.

Naturally you may not be able to to all that I mention above, but try to do all with great Love.

Peace
James
 
In judging this or other things remember one needs not only the grave matter…but full knowledge and complete (deliberate) consent.

If you do not have one yet…please get a regular confessor who can help you determine these things etc… very important.

This post i will post again…please read it slowly and think about your situation:

Regarding thoughts

while Jesus makes it clear that one can sin in ones thoughts…just cause some lustful thought happens does not mean that one sinned…

(and one can have a sufficiently good reason to think about sexual matters…for instance studying moral theology…but care must be taken to avoid things that would be a problem…but that is another question)

What should we do with* unwanted* sexual thoughts? Those pesky temptations that can come …even though we are not seeking them etc…

(there are of course some things we should avoid that cause them…and there can be sin if it is something one should reasonably avoid…but often they come uninvited)

First…Relax. Do not worry.

Now are they mortal sins?

For a mortal sin one needs a grave matter …full knowledge AND deliberate consent!!!

A. If you do not want the thought…it the thought displeases you: it can be a sign actually that you did not give consent or do not give full consent.

B. Even if you felt a temptation for the thought – and were drawn to it —but rejected it and maybe even turned to God : again a sign not full consent.

C. But what if one has a tempting thought --say of a sexual nature and even hesitated for a moment…but then rejected it for one did not want to sin? : it can be partial consent perhaps (and thus a venial sin)-- or it may be no sin at all but rather a strong temptation that drew you but then you saw what was happening and turned away.

D. A temptation can even be very strong or the thoughts very often – but this does NOT mean one has consented! so worry not…even it they go on for a long time…

remember --for it to be mortal there must be that deliberate consent!

What to do? on the spiritual side–relax first of all and remember the above.

Next – know that the more one fears the thoughts the more likely they are to come… or said another way --the more a person seeks to avoid the thoughts the more likely he will have a problem with them. (but do not worry about this either!)

for example: for the next 10 seconds try NOT to think of an apple.

tick tock …

tick tock…

Ok what did you think of? Most likely an apple.

So it is best to ignore them and just not consent and then turn your attention to some other good thing…for instance whatever you are doing. Simply do not consent and move on. and do not worry

another point – thoughts can just happen --they are the stuff with which we think…it is up to us to consent and take them further or not. and just because they are REAL VIVID and almost “think themselves” does not mean per se that one has given ANY consent.

they can be annoying…but need cause no actual harm …
 
Remember too:

The classic stages of temptation when we are tempted are:
  1. Suggestion (the evil is proposed to us in some way) this can be quite attractive …can be thoughts that happen, ideas etc.
  2. Pleasure (a kind of automatic pleasure can happen from the suggestion) this pleasure can just happen…one is not “trying to have it” not wanting it…this is just a reaction.
3…then one either consents or does not consent.

(one can either consent fully and thus engage in things willingly …or not consent and perhaps thus grow in virtue…following Christ!)

Now it can often happen that one begins to “partially consent” but then rejects it and thus does not give full consent.

When one is tempted…

Some signs that one lacked consent or gave only “partial consent”:

If even though there was some instinctive pleasure …we do not want it…we are unhappy or horrified about the evil…or struggle to not be overcome …we turn to God in Prayer --these are some signs of no consent (if of course we stay in this stage…and do not later consent)

(For example some thoughts come out of the blue just cause one happened to see an attractive person…and one does not want the thoughts but turns to God in Prayer or is horrified by them and turns to something else etc…no matter how much they come back…if one does not consent at all…there is no sin…but rather possibly growth in virtues)

If one hesitates for a moment but then does not want to sin and so rejects it and does not give full consent (thus a fault against prudence)

If one resists but the resistance is half hearted…one does resist but it is weak or slow…but in the end one rejects it…such would seem to be half consent and thus venial

Of course if one then gives in and gives full consent…then such can be mortal…remember…partial consent or half consent is not full consent…and thus not mortal.

In the end …if there is still doubt that one consented:

if the person is lax …one can urge confession for it is likely they consented otherwise it would not bother them…

for the delicate conscience or the scrupulous or one with scruples…one can rule out full consent for if they would have fully consented…it can be said that would know it.

(Based on A Tanquery… he bases things on S. Augustine…but much of this is simply repeated in various places…for it is the basics in judging such)
 
thanks for all the help but i am stuck with this problem and dont know how to beat this once and for all. its a weekly thing and i do not know what sin is anymore.

At the end of the day when i see what my sins are i really dont know. All i can see is my stuggles and then say maybe their is sin their. I mean dont get me wrong if i punched someone i know that is sin. when it comes to actions i know them but other thing esp when it had to do with the mind i really stuggle with.

all i know is that there was something in my mind and i sort of was aware it was their and liked the thought and went with it but then switched it off complete after 2 seconds and said i am very sorry lord. I guess when i swited it off I fully relized that i shouldn’t be thinking this.

what i stuggle with is because i was sort of aware of it is it mortal.mi dont know anymore
 
spirocatania said:
thanks for all the help but i am stuck with this problem and dont know how to beat this once and for all. its a weekly thing and i do not know what sin is anymore.

At the end of the day when i see what my sins are i really dont know. All i can see is my stuggles and then say maybe their is sin their. I mean dont get me wrong if i punched someone i know that is sin. when it comes to actions i know them but other thing esp when it had to do with the mind i really stuggle with.

all i know is that there was something in my mind and i sort of was aware it was their and liked the thought and went with it but then switched it off complete after 2 seconds and said i am very sorry lord. I guess when i swited it off I fully relized that i shouldn’t be thinking this.

what i stuggle with is because i was sort of aware of it is it mortal.mi dont know anymore
Click to expand...
FEAR NOT
Please Take those words to heart.

This is a problem that we all must confront and deal with. You are indeed “stuck” with this problem and likely will be for some time. That is simply the way it is with habits. Also, satan knows that this is bothering you so he will attempt to exploit it in order to get you to dispair.

BUT, what satan does not know is that, by recognizing the habit, and resisting it, you have ALREADY beaten it. Now, all that is left is the work of “cleaning up the mess”. This takes time and effort, but little by little you will overcome and eventually you’ll look up and see that this problem, that looks so big and troubling now, has shrunk to a rare, tiny pest.
Don’t get me wrong, it won’t happen over night. It will take time and effort. But it will happen.

Keep your eyes upon Christ from whom comes your strength.

Peace
James
 
spirocatania said:
thanks for all the help but i am stuck with this problem and dont know how to beat this once and for all. its a weekly thing and i do not know what sin is anymore.

At the end of the day when i see what my sins are i really dont know. All i can see is my stuggles and then say maybe their is sin their. I mean dont get me wrong if i punched someone i know that is sin. when it comes to actions i know them but other thing esp when it had to do with the mind i really stuggle with.

all i know is that there was something in my mind and i sort of was aware it was their and liked the thought and went with it but then switched it off complete after 2 seconds and said i am very sorry lord. I guess when i swited it off I fully relized that i shouldn’t be thinking this.

what i stuggle with is because i was sort of aware of it is it mortal.mi dont know anymore
Click to expand...
Please read the two posts I posted above…print them out for reference…read them from time to time…they will help…they are time tested things (not just my ideas)

ALSO get a REGULAR CONFESSOR who can help you with these things…this is very important for you.

And above all: seek the face of Jesus Christ…he loves you … get to know him more and more…he is the Good Shepherd who loves you!

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/messages/youth/documents/hf_ben-xvi_mes_20100806_youth_en.html

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/messages/youth/documents/hf_ben-xvi_mes_20090222_youth_en.html
 
ok one last time

I looked at someone, a thought came to me or i created it myself. I went with the thought liking it and wanting it. this happened for a couple of seconds. as i was in the thought liking it and taking part in it I was relizing what i was doing and i felt that i commited a sin and said i’m very sorry lord and stoped the whole thing.

I was aware of the thought and all i wanted was the thought but then as i wanted the thought I also thought to myself i should not keep this thought and stioped it but didn’t stop it with hatred for the thought but because i knew i shouldn’t be in it.

is this mortal sin do i stay away from communion.

The priest on here said he sees no sin here but i feel maybe I explained it to him wrong.

what if it is mortal sin and i recieve holy communion thinking that it not mortal sin
 
spirocatania said:
ok one last time

I looked at someone, a thought came to me or i created it myself. I went with the thought liking it and wanting it. this happened for a couple of seconds. as i was in the thought liking it and taking part in it I was relizing what i was doing and i felt that i commited a sin and said i’m very sorry lord and stoped the whole thing.

I was aware of the thought and all i wanted was the thought but then as i wanted the thought I also thought to myself i should not keep this thought and stioped it but didn’t stop it with hatred for the thought but because i knew i shouldn’t be in it.

is this mortal sin do i stay away from communion.

The priest on here said he sees no sin here but i feel maybe I explained it to him wrong.

what if it is mortal sin and i recieve holy communion thinking that it not mortal sin
Click to expand...
OK, one last time.

It would appear that no mortal sin occurred. It is difficult to draw from what you have written that you had given full concent of the will in the “few seconds” you are refering to. I would not feel the necesity to refrain from communion over this.

BUT - For One last time…
Go to confession at your earliest opportunity and discuss this with your confessor. We here are NOT equiped to give you a definitive answer…

peace
James
 
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