How to overcome false humility?

[WildCatholic]

Let’s just say i like to think of myself as humble to the point that I don’t really mention what is good about myself. In fact one of the hardest things to do for me is to write 10 good things about myself (I struggle and get mad and ask "why does it matter what i think of myself. God’s thoughts are all that matters) and honestly the only thing I think of myself that I take pride in is my intelligence, granted when it comes down to it most people are intelligent in one way or another so it isn’t that big of a deal. Also i tend to downplay my accomplishments. I currently accepted a teaching position at a small Catholic school and i get a lot of compliments for that but to me everything seems like straw and that people just are being nice so they can say “oh i’m such a nice person look how nice i treat everyone even if i think they are a creepy weirdo loser like this guy”

Another thing is that I always seem to be negative. I feel like i’m some socially retarded weirdo who while not ugly is not attractive enough to draw people near. Also i seem to have lots of problems like losing my temper (usually at home in private. People have said I have the patience of a saint in public, especially in volunteering in a high needs special education class). Honestly I just don’t see a lot of good in me other than i’m smart and that i love god. But strangely i feel that’s enough and I question why its so important to “love” myself and be positive when at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks including myself. it’s God’s opinion that matters and as long as i live by his rules I can hopefully get to heaven.

 

[Julie_de_Sales]

We should recognize the talents that we have received from God, in order to thank Him for them. We have so many reasons to be grateful towards God and nothing is more pleasing to the one who makes a gift than seeing that it is appreciated. So humility is recognizing our qualities and accomplishments, but at the same time realizing that all that we have and did, we have it by the grace of God.

As we restrain from judging other people and speaking badly about them, we should do the same with ourselves (even in our own hearts), by being patient and loving ourselves because God loved us first. And it’s so important to have a positive attitude in life.

St Francis of Sales said that he neither talked good or bad about himself.
Humility could mean thinking less about ourselves and more about God and the others and how we can help them and work for the greater glory of God with all our gifts and talents.

 

[nuntym]

+JMJ+

Remember my post about being humble in your other thread, WildCatholic? What do you think of it?

 

[MacQ]

Let’s just say i like to think of myself as humble to the point that I don’t really mention what is good about myself. In fact one of the hardest things to do for me is to write 10 good things about myself (I struggle and get mad and ask "why does it matter what i think of myself. God’s thoughts are all that matters) and honestly the only thing I think of myself that I take pride in is my intelligence, granted when it comes down to it most people are intelligent in one way or another so it isn’t that big of a deal. Also i tend to downplay my accomplishments. I currently accepted a teaching position at a small Catholic school and i get a lot of compliments for that but to me everything seems like straw and that people just are being nice so they can say “oh i’m such a nice person look how nice i treat everyone even if i think they are a creepy weirdo loser like this guy”

Another thing is that I always seem to be negative. I feel like i’m some socially retarded weirdo who while not ugly is not attractive enough to draw people near. Also i seem to have lots of problems like losing my temper (usually at home in private. People have said I have the patience of a saint in public, especially in volunteering in a high needs special education class). Honestly I just don’t see a lot of good in me other than i’m smart and that i love god. But strangely i feel that’s enough and I question why its so important to “love” myself and be positive when at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks including myself. it’s God’s opinion that matters and as long as i live by his rules I can hopefully get to heaven.

You seem a tad confused about what humility is. It’s not an obsessive search for your good qualities so you can demean them. Yes that is false humility (or disingenuous).

Someone gives you a compliment (most likely sincere attempt to affirm or encourage you) and your reaction is that they probably just want to feel good about themselves?
Really?

Since you asked the question about how to overcome it, I’ll give you the dutch uncle answer:

1. Stop thinking about yourself so much
2. Give other people a little more credit

 

[WildCatholic]

+JMJ+

Remember my post about being humble in your other thread, WildCatholic? What do you think of it?

To be honest I don’t think God gives us confidence or doesn’t. Sadly some people are born with it and some are not. I unfortunately was not but I have faith that God will love me no matter what as long as I do what he asks of me and follow his rules.

Also you talk about bowing down to God but not to the afflictions he allows. Well I do bow down to God but I don’t feel like he cares about our afflictions. For some reason I have this image of me as a homeless man and God comes up to me. I ask him to help me out and at least do something. all he says to me is "Well just keep praying and go to mass"and just walks away. it feels like God could care less about my suffering or anyone else’s. it’s all just random happenstance and really God could care less if we are miserable and long as we praise him and follow him.

The last thing is that whats the point of having good things if they don’t get me anything or they aren’t worth anything to most people. I’d probably have more friends if i was outgoing or less introverted but instead God made me someone who at times feels like I’m not even human because i feel like i don’t fit in for some odd reason and I don’t know why. It’s why i turn to god. When I die I hope by following what he’s laid out for us I can have eternal joy rather than just suffering here on earth. At least in heaven everyone is equal because we are all followers of God and his son.

So there it is in a nutshell. A big nutshell

 

[sunburst2014]

Humility could mean thinking less about ourselves and more about God and the others and how we can help them and work for the greater glory of God with all our gifts and talents.

Amen! Humility is all about countering pride, that is, countering the false notion that we are God. I definitely do not think that humility equals low self-esteem or negative self-image. Humility in my experience starts with realizing that we are totally dependent on God (i.e. being poor in spirit) and then to realize all the ways that God is able to work through me when I surrender myself wholly.

 

[animalis]

What is true about humility is that it is always an act of saying no at the face of arrogance. In this sense, it is perceiving yourself as being invisible. A humble person can never truly admit they are humble. Because they realize the estimation is far short of the truth. Nothing in this world is truly great, and our perception is no different . And humility is a great thing.

 

[Vico]

Let’s just say i like to think of myself as humble to the point that I don’t really mention what is good about myself. In fact one of the hardest things to do for me is to write 10 good things about myself (I struggle and get mad and ask "why does it matter what i think of myself. God’s thoughts are all that matters) and honestly the only thing I think of myself that I take pride in is my intelligence, granted when it comes down to it most people are intelligent in one way or another so it isn’t that big of a deal. Also i tend to downplay my accomplishments. I currently accepted a teaching position at a small Catholic school and i get a lot of compliments for that but to me everything seems like straw and that people just are being nice so they can say “oh i’m such a nice person look how nice i treat everyone even if i think they are a creepy weirdo loser like this guy”

Another thing is that I always seem to be negative. I feel like i’m some socially retarded weirdo who while not ugly is not attractive enough to draw people near. Also i seem to have lots of problems like losing my temper (usually at home in private. People have said I have the patience of a saint in public, especially in volunteering in a high needs special education class). Honestly I just don’t see a lot of good in me other than i’m smart and that i love god. But strangely i feel that’s enough and I question why its so important to “love” myself and be positive when at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks including myself. it’s God’s opinion that matters and as long as i live by his rules I can hopefully get to heaven.

Humility includes recognition of God’s gifts and the use of them according to his will, and is opposed to immoderate self-abjection. What others think of you is important in that it is based at least partly upon your behavior, which can give good example, a living example of an image of Christ, as we are created in the image and likeness of God. You can take credit for cooperating with God and responsibility when you do not.

God’s supernatural gifts are: sanctifying grace, actual grace, the infused virtues, and the gifts of the Holy Spirit. The infused virtues are faith, hope, charity, prudence, justice, fortitude, and temperance. The gifts of the Holy Spirit are wisdom, understanding, council, fortitude, knowledge, piety (desire to worship God and to serve God out of love), fear of the lord (desire not to offend God) arising from love.

 

[ready]

Let’s just say i like to think of myself as humble to the point that I don’t really mention what is good about myself. In fact one of the hardest things to do for me is to write 10 good things about myself (I struggle and get mad and ask "why does it matter what i think of myself. God’s thoughts are all that matters) and honestly the only thing I think of myself that I take pride in is my intelligence, granted when it comes down to it most people are intelligent in one way or another so it isn’t that big of a deal. Also i tend to downplay my accomplishments. I currently accepted a teaching position at a small Catholic school and i get a lot of compliments for that but to me everything seems like straw and that people just are being nice so they can say “oh i’m such a nice person look how nice i treat everyone even if i think they are a creepy weirdo loser like this guy”

Another thing is that I always seem to be negative. I feel like i’m some socially retarded weirdo who while not ugly is not attractive enough to draw people near. Also i seem to have lots of problems like losing my temper (usually at home in private. People have said I have the patience of a saint in public, especially in volunteering in a high needs special education class). Honestly I just don’t see a lot of good in me other than i’m smart and that i love god. But strangely i feel that’s enough and I question why its so important to “love” myself and be positive when at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks including myself. it’s God’s opinion that matters and as long as i live by his rules I can hopefully get to heaven.

Do not think about yourself except during prayer, your examens during the day and during your examination of conscience at night, or when you make an Act of Contrition to God after sinning. The only thing that matter is what God thinks about you and that you love HIM. You only need to think about yourself when you are trying to uproot sins and vices or when praying, so don’t dwell on your good qualities; rather use your time in loving God, saving souls and in uprooting your sins and vices. God bless you.